At the whim of a tin-foil hat

The Florida Supreme Court puts Ralph Nader back on the ballot. Says a Nader spokesman, “The Democrats should stop trying to win this election in court and start competing for votes on the issues.” Yeah, at least in courts stacked with Republicans.

If there’s a phrase that right-wingers use that effectively puts their opponents instantly on the defensive, it’s “conspiracy theory.” Team Chimpy deployed this weapon Friday against Kerry’s assertion that Bush has a “secret plan” to call up more reservists and national guards after the election is safely over, and send them to Iraq. The Pentagon gave a better answer: of course we’re planning to screw those guys, it’s not a secret. Which is true, except that it is a secret which guys are going to be screwed, which makes it hard for people to plan their lives (or deaths, as the case may be).

So the “conspiracy theory” charge hangs like a Damocles sword over the heads of journalists and bloggers who write about the doings of the Mayberry Machiavellis, like the right-wing blogger named... Buckhead (yeah we’re all thinking the same thing, but we have too much class to say it) who was able to damage the credibility of the CBS documents within a suspiciously short period of time (i.e., within the same news cycle), and who turned out to be a lawyer who works for right-wing groups. Of course we don’t know for sure if this was a scheme concocted in the feverish brain of Karl Rove, but if we ask “cui bono,” we see that the issue of Bush’s draft-dodging has been effectively defused, or obscured, just as it was becoming a real threat.

Incidentally, it was becoming a threat not because we now know all that much more than we knew years ago (for example, my 1st reference to it in my proto-blog--archived on this site--was way back on 7/8/99; I reported on 9/9/99 that it was the speaker of the Texas Lege who got him into the Guard, on 6/17/00 that he missed his medical on the first year it included a drug test, etc), but because of a slight semantic shift in the way it was being presented: not just as a spoiled rich kid goofing of, but of that rich kid refusing direct orders. And what gave that semantic framing of the Guard issue its salience in 2004, as opposed to in 1999-2000, is precisely the fact that Shrub pushed us into the longest combat situation since Vietnam with an inadequate military, which he’s desperately shoring up with stop-loss orders, national guard units (fun fact: more members of the national guards have already died in Iraq than did in Vietnam).

The problem with Kerry making the “secret plan” accusations is that his plans for Iraq are equally secret, and, since he plans to continue to occupy Iraq until at least 2009 and doesn’t plan on a draft, he will also be using reservists and national guards. Secret plan, unless you possess the powers of logic and common sense.