Saturday, February 24, 2007

A temporary feeling of goodness


Sgt Paul Cortez of the 101st Airborne got 101 100 years for participating in the Mahmudiya massacre, gang-rape, and barbeque. Where one of his accomplices at his own trial explained his actions with the words, “I hated Iraqis,” Cortez said “I still don’t have an answer. I don’t know why.” We’ll check back in 100 years.

Plan your next vacation now: the Guardian visits the Welsh National Wool Museum.

Army chief of staff Peter Schoomaker, who used to run the operation to capture Osama bin Laden, says that it isn’t really that important to capture Osama bin Laden, now that he thinks about it. “I don’t know that it’s all that important, frankly,” he said, and if we did succeed, “then what? There’s a temporary feeling of goodness, but in the long run, we may make him bigger than he is today.” That’s exactly how I feel about Scarlett Johansson not answering any of my letters and emails and invitations to join me in a trip to the Welsh National Wool Museum, and getting that restraining order. I mean, now that I think about it, I don’t know that she’s all that hot, frankly. And if I did succeed, then what? There’s a temporary... okay, I’ll stop there.

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