Thursday, November 19, 2009

Man is the most dangerous game. Fat man, a little less dangerous.


A gang in Peru has been killing people for their fat, which was probably sold to European cosmetics manufacturers. Plan your vacations, and skin care regimen, accordingly.

So not kosher: Rabbi Baruch Chalomish “was so exhausted after three days of constant cocaine-fuelled partying with escorts that his pimp grew worried and cancelled that day’s supply of girls, a jury was told.” He did this “on the ninth day, and after the rabbi had stayed up for three straight days”. And that is why we light the menorah. The caring pimp slash drug dealer, Nasir Abbas (!), “said that he was too scared to attend the trial after the rabbi ‘sent around some heavies’ to threaten him”.

An Alert Reader suggests a Name of the Day: Amy Cunninghis, the legally married wife of federal court employee Karen Golinski. The 9th Circuit judge has ordered that Ms Cunninghis be given spousal insurance benefits, which the Obama admin has been fighting. Fox News will no doubt be claiming that Obamacare will cover cunninghis. I would add that “go linski” also kind of sounds like something lesbians might get up to. If you have any speculations about what it means to “go linski”... well, I wouldn’t be surprised, pervert.

However, my personal choice for Name of the Day: the new president of Europe, Herman Van Rompuy.

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