From the table of contents of today’s Daily Telegraph:
Pets pamperedThe head of the company says, “Then let a father explain to his daughter why her beloved pussy cat has gone.” There’s no picture, but I assume he was twirling long mustaches while he said this.
An authoritative magazine published by the Jesuits lashed out at the culture of pampered pets yesterday, saying animals had no souls or rights. [As the Jesuits like to say, give me the puppy for a year (that’s 7 dog years), and I will give you the dog. I don’t know how exactly that joke relates to that particular story, but it popped into my head.]
Pets face kidnap for debt
The power company that supplies Russia's far eastern port of Vladivostok is threatening to kidnap the pets of customers who fail to pay their bills.
Canadian PM Chretien will retire in February. What will he try next? Marijuana. “I will have my money for my fine, and a joint in the other hand.”
An Israeli tank commander is actually going to be charged for “negligence” in the deaths of 4 Palestinians, 3 of them children aged 5, 6 and 13, during the Jenin Massacre. He negligently opened fire on civilians with tank shells and machine guns. Oops. He’s being charged only because someone videotaped as a tank fired a shell at a group of children on bicycles who had just bought chocolate bars. I’d like to use the word negligence sarcastically again, but I’m too pissed off. Let’s take it as read, shall we?
Bush on the slide in his poll numbers: “Sometimes the American people like the decisions I make, sometimes they don’t. But they need to know I'll make tough decisions based upon what I think is right.” Yeah, that’s what’s worrying us. Hell, he doesn’t even get his news from Fox, he gets what Karl Rove tells him was on Fox.
When Valerie Plame’s name was leaked, a snowball was started down a hill. There are public documents which listed her employer as a company called Brewster-Jennings & Associates. So when Rove or whoever also exposed that firm as a CIA front. Although more specifically, that idiot Novak exposed it today, saying he didn’t believe it was real. It is, and no doubt was the cover for other agents.
The Arnold says he can’t remember making pro-Hitler comments. Anyone else in the world would say that they hadn’t, he says he can’t remember. Which means he did, and just hopes that he has the only copies of the out-takes from Pumping Iron. And returning to the sexual assault issue, he does the “a little bit nutty, a little bit slutty” thing: “One wonders what the motivation is. Why am I getting all this stuff thrown at me now? No one complained.” About another incident in which the victim has gone public (there are now 11 women), he doesn’t remember that either. Several of the actresses he’s worked with have come forward to say that he was a perfect gentleman to them. Of course he was, it’s the powerless women he likes to humiliate.
At an event today he dropped a wrecking ball on a car. This had something to do with the car tax. Gubernatorial candidate Gallagher could not be reached for comment.
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