Thursday, January 19, 2006

People saying stupid shit edition


Clarence Ray Allen, the 76-year old executed in California this week, has asked that if he had another heart attack, he be allowed to die. Prison officials said no. “At no point are we not going to value the sanctity of life,” said a San Quentin spokesmodel.

George Bush, asked by some idiot in Virginia whether the LauraBot would run for the US Senate: “she’s not interested in running for office. She is interested in literacy.” Jeez, George, your example to the contrary, literacy isn’t actually a disqualification for public office.

And don’t think you’re safe just because you don’t know what the squiggly things on paper mean: according to George, “The terrorists have got a weapon: It’s called our TV screens.” Especially those big-screen jobbies, those can really hurt if they get dropped on your foot.

Actually, George says you don’t need to be able to read, you just need to be able to dream: “One of the things about our country is it’s a place where you can start with zero,” you know, son of a president, grandson of a senator, that sort of thing, “you start with a dream and a good idea... and take risk and realize your dream. And it’s really important we keep it that way forever. America has got to be a place where dreamers can realize their dreams. And I love being in the midst of dreamers.”

In a speech today, Dick Cheney called for a renewal of the Patriot Act, saying “I believe the security of the United States needs to be above politics.”

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