Wednesday, October 31, 2001

A French female astronaut has returned from space. She brought a teddy bear with her. Awwww.

I got my notice from the postmaster general today telling me what to do with suspicious mail. I also got a leaflet for the journal Anglo-Saxon England. What would Beowulf have done?

The health & fitness section of the Times today leads with a story "A Career Spent in Study of Training And Exercise, Lap by Grueling Lap." I lost interest when it turned out to be about swimming, not lap dancing.

With "President" Bush at the World Series, the Times says, there were almost as many cops on duty as the time John Rocker returned to play.

Also in today's paper was a piece by Paul Krugman (op-ed) on the alternative minimum corporate income tax the R's are so anxious to repeal retroactively to 1986. It seems that a great percentage of the benefit would go to energy and mining companies. Dick Cheney strikes again, from an undisclosed location.

Speaking of which: Cheney hiding in a bomb shelter, Bush at a ball game. I'm guessing that one of these two is over-reacting and the other under-reacting, and that the appropriate behaviour is somewhere in the middle.

All employees at the Supreme Court were negative for anthrax, but a pubic hair was found in Clarence Thomas's Coke.

Tuesday, October 30, 2001

Government warns us to be worried that something might happen sometime to someone, they're pretty sure. So we should all be on the lookout for...something. I personally think Ashcroft meant that we're about to be invaded by midget Taliban wearing masks; if I see any I'm planning to hit them with a shovel.

Someone looked at the US government documents relating to the coup that deposed the Afghan king we're trying to put back. It seems we didn't think much of him and, oh yeah, had advanced information of the coup (a year in advance).

One of the places the US military is now fighting Al Qaeda is in the Philippines.

And this week we've started training Nicaraguan military officers at the School of the Americas, or whatever it's calling itself this week (you remember how they solved the problem of the place's reputation for training torturers and death-squad leaders by changing its name? if not, there's an article on it in the www.guardian.co.uk/columnists, which compares it with bin Laden's training camps).

Monday, October 29, 2001

Global warming has claimed its first nation, Tuvalu, known only for its valuable internet domain name (.tv). It has given up and will move to New Zealand.

Some guy who saw that annoying French film The Red Balloon (which my two elementary schools both subjected me to many times) set himself aloft with 600 balloons, cutting himself free and parachuting to earth from 11,000 feet.

So the food packets dropped on Afghanistan are yellow and the unexploded cluster bombs are also yellow. That was clever.

The honeymoon is finally beginning to show signs of strain, and as a post-Clinton "president" should have known, it's the spin, stupid. You'll remember I commented a few days after 9/11 that all the talk about reassuring Americans that it was safe to fly was more about spin than about actually making it safe, and was phrased as such: making Americans feel safe. No one noticed that, but when they tried to do it at the start of the anthrax thing, with absolutely no information, just being reflexively reassuring, it began not to look so good. Now they're evidently lying about Bush's health. He's not getting thinner, he just redistributed it.

I have another quote, or paraphrase actually, that applies well to American foreign policy, although it was originally applied by Sir Oswald Mosley to Mussolini's foreign policy: it triumphs like a drunken driver, not by reason of his own skill but because all sober people had been concerned to get out of his way.

Saturday, October 27, 2001

Continuing its failing propaganda war, the US has been dropping wind-up radios on Afghanistan. They are capable of receiving only one frequency. You're probably thinking right now about the irony of sending radios that can only receive American propaganda as a way of pluralism. Or maybe you're thinking about the FCC's decision this week to let Rupert Murdoch own as much of a single market as he wants. But think again about it, and you'll realize that anyone caught with this radio does not have the excuse that he was using it to listen to the Pakistani top ten, so anyone caught with this radio is likely to be killed.

Speaking of unremarked details, I haven't belabored the "anti-terrorism" legislation, with its elimination of any procedural safeguards, privacy, civil rights etc., so I'll just talk about one aspect, which some idiot reporter didn't notice when talking about it on Washington Week in Review yesterday. She said that the CIA has just mounds of data awaiting this bill to pass so that it could share it with law-enforcement officials under the provision allowing for the sharing of info between agencies. OK, first obviously there was nothing stopping the CIA from doing that before, except the fact that the CIA doesn't share information. But what this provision really did was make it possible for evidence collected in, say, grand jury proceedings, to be handed over to intelligence agencies. The criminal justice system was just coopted by the intelligence establishment, and that does not bode well at all.

Friday, October 26, 2001

The Pentagon is plum out of ideas. All it can think of to do is hit the same Red Cross depot for the second time. So it is soliciting the general public to send in suggestions on how to defeat bin Laden. I'm working on mine now, although I hope they don't mind the coffee ring and the powdered sugar from my donut. Ha ha ha, I'm just kidding, I don't even drink coffee. Yes this is definitely the time for them to be encouraging strange mail. This was of course how the Nazis were defeated. Churchill went on the radio and said We shall fight them on the beaches, we shall fight them in the laundrettes, and if anyone out there has any other suggestions as to where we should fight them, answers please on a postcard, winners to receive some book certificates and a seat at the Yalta conference.

My idea so far involves a giant magnet and a giant rubber band, but I'm still leafing through the Acme catalog.

Hurrah for Russ Feingold, the only Senator with any integrity.

Singapore is to show other democracies how it is done. Can you even call it a general election if 2/3 of the seats are uncontested?

See the Tom Toles cartoon for the 26th, easily available on the web.

September 2004: hello to those looking for Tom Toles's Bush refrigerator magnet cartoon. You can find it by clicking here. And then you might want to come back to my site. If you like Toles, you may well like it too.

January 2006: and if you're looking for the Toles cartoon the Pentagon objected to, click here.

Thursday, October 25, 2001

eccentrics / eccentric web sites

There's a mouse in my apartment. It's a good thing I own a cat--no, wait, she's the one who brought it in.

A British prisoner is suing for his right to gay porn. Heterosexuals get their soft core porn, so he wants his. Says it's an abuse of his rights.

For those playing the home game, this is the part where I would normally make a joke. Can you guess what it might be? A little hint: it involves use of the word "abuse."

A steer was stripped of his prize at the Minnesota state fair, for use of drugs. I don't suppose there's a picture of it and the governor together.

The NY Times's Thursday computer section performed its usual function of making me scared of the future, with a story about kitchen appliances being made now with Web access. Your microwave will be able to download recipes and perform them. Watch tv and have videoconferencing on your refrigerator door.

Unnamed administration official in the NY Times: "you can bomb the wrong place in Afghanistan and not take much heat for it. But don't mess up at the post office."

Belgium becomes the second country to legalize euthanasia.

The US claims to have inside information that the Taliban will poison the aid dropped by the US. So if it has come through Taliban control, they say, don't eat it. This is probably the least subtle psyop I've ever heard of, at least since they dropped those bats on the Philippines (don't ask). Oh yeah, we know exactly what the Taliban are thinking about. A 3-year old could see through this, although not the NY Times, which now believes everything its government sources tell it.

Right, I promised web sites:

To get your name if you were a cyborg (that is what your name is an acronym for): www.brunching.com/toys/toy.cyborger.html

Jesusmuseum.com, your site for wacko fundamentalist sites (for example the one that explains how various Hollywood types are working for Satan. Ok, Demi Moore, obviously, but...)

Along the same theme, Jesus.com, a guy who looks like Jesus and wants a date. Click on "Bathe with Jesus," if you dare (I didn't).

And www.jesusdressup.com. Like one of those cut-out books, you can put a hat on Jesus, or a cowboy outfit. Did I mention he's on a cross? Hours of fun.

The pipes, the pipes

The Catholic diocese of Providence says that "Danny Boy" is not
appropriate for funerals. Someone tell the Irish already: Danny Boy is not appropriate for anything, ever. It is not good for children and other living things. I do not want to hear it on a plane, I do not want to hear it on a train.

Congress is working on a $100 billion stimulus package. I mean for God's sake Bill Gates lost $9 billion, something must be done. Fortunately, help is on the way. $2.3 billion goes to all the unemployed. $1.4 billion goes to IBM. Seems fair to me.

Anthrax is found in the White House mail room but Bush says, three times no less, that he doesn't have it, but refuses to say how he knows this: has he taken the test, is he taking antibiotics? Did Uncle Dick tell him he was safe when he tucked him in at night (you laugh, but this is traditional: Al Gore tucked in Bill Clinton, Spiro Agnew tucked in Richard Nixon, Nelson Rockefeller made sure that the guard rails were up so Ford wouldn't fall out of bed.) Anyway, the government tells us that the chance of our getting anthrax is slim. Well, so is Calista Flockhart, and she creeps me out too.

Tuesday, October 23, 2001

America is returning to normal. For example, Texas just executed someone for a crime committed when he was a juvenile. Let the healing begin!

The spin continues. Congress returns to town, trying to speak in a deeper, more manly voice. In Britain, Parliament debates what should have happened to the bureaucrat who sent out the memo I referred to a while back within an hour of the WTC being hit, that now was a good time to bury news. Curiously enough, while this debate was going on, the government was announcing that there would be peace in Northern Ireland, that it was sending the Marines into Afghanistan, and that cannibas would be decriminalized.

Rumsfeld, who just yesterday was pooh-poohing the possibility that the US could ever accidentally bomb a hospital, also said that it was ok to continue the war over Ramadan because sometimes Muslims do that. He then went on to refer to black people as niggers, because sometimes black people do that.

Saturday, October 20, 2001

Before we go to the Times piece on humor and current affairs, let me tell you something really hilarious, no wait I mean horrifying: the actual destination of the 4th plane, that crashed in Pennsylvania. Three Mile Island (or one of two other nuclear power plants in the area).

Even the funny stuff this week is sort of tragic, if only to the people involved. The zookeeper stepped on by an elephant, for example. Or the guy in Pennsylvania who died during the do-it-yourself sex-change operation.

A story in I think the Telegraph tells of the prison in Greenland, where everyone goes out to work during the day, and usually end their prison term with more money than when they went in, plus new clothes, VCRs (they can rent videos in town. In fact, they can do damned well anything, although they do have to have guards with them if they choose to go hunting.) The more serious criminals are sent to prison in Denmark, which is evidently what counts for stern in the "Norwegian countries" as Biden put it.

Friday, October 19, 2001

German prostitutes are to be fully legalized, able to take their johns to court for payment (well, it sounds like there might have to be a written contract, which seems a bit unlikely), and to retire on state pension at 60.

That's my second old-prostitute story in the last couple of months.

Thank god Israel kept its head down and indeed kept its head, and
certainly didn't invade Bethlehem and kill children and assassinate people and make rash comments about the age of Arafat being over. Because that wouldn't be very helpful right now.

Yesterday the Pentagon announced that it had destroyed the camps in Afghanistan, today that it had sent in Rangers. What is this, the war of the Boy Scouts? I picture a lot of people wearing short pants, running around tying knots and rubbing two infidels together to start a fire and ... I think I'll just let this concept die a natural death right here.

I finally figured out what all those comments about bin Laden, Taliban et al not representing "true" Islam reminded me of, and it was the endless, obnoxious, hopelessly smug "Who counts as a Jew" debate that Israel engages in.

Thursday, October 18, 2001

Wednesday, October 17, 2001

Another sign that science must be stopped: phone lie detectors, soon to be used by British insurance companies to deal with claimants. They claim over 90% accuracy rate.

A Guardian columnist, suggesting that the American political elite isn't up to its new task of dealing with foreign stuff, quoted Joe Biden, now chair of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee, who suggested that the Norwegian countries could act as intermediaries with Afghanistan. Knowing Joe, he was just reading off the paper of whoever sat next to him (Jesse Helms?)

Colin Powell is busy negotiating the shape of the next Afghan government with Pakistan, Iran, Peru for all I know, anyone, basically, who isn't actually Afghan. He is willing to include "moderate Taliban members." I think we once exchanged arms for hostages with their Iranian cousins.

Funnier than moderate Talibans was the description on ITN of Rehavam Zeevi, the guy assassinated yesterday, as the hardline tourism minister. Or possibly it was the minister of hardline tourism. I think hardline tourism is where you demand that the locals serve you food you're familiar with, speak your language, and you speak very loudly and slowly to them if they don't. No wait, that's American tourism. Zeevi has been advocating a full-scale invasion of the West Bank and Gaza, so I'm guessing he wasn't that good as a tourism minister. Actually, Zeevi was a big ole shit (I was going to call him a pig, but it didn't seem kosher, although Muslims keep calling Bush a dog, probably because they've heard that he can lick his own genitals, but I digress) and when he joined the government I correctly called it an act of war. I haven't heard what the US reaction has been, although it'll be interesting to see if they label this assassination terrorism but not the one by the Israelis that this was in reaction to, and whether Dubya knows that Zeevi once called his father a lying anti-Semite.

The House by a vote of 404 to 0 suggests that public schools use the slogan God Bless America, presumably because America has just sneezed. The pledge of allegiance is also big just now, even in Madison, which reversed its previous decision and will now allow either the pledge or the Star-Spangled Banner, which under the old rule was to be instrumental only, you know, the easy listening version. This is to comply with a state law requiring a daily display of patriotism. I'm assuming that foreign students are also required to sing God Save the Queen or O Canada or Waltzing Matilda, as appropriate. I don't mind them singing the Star-Spangled Banner, as long as they sing all of it, including the "their blood shall wash out their foul footsteps' pollution" line some of us spent too much time at Santa Cruz trying to figure out how to sing.

Tuesday, October 16, 2001

The 9th Circuit says that a new trial is needed in the case of someone sentenced to death by a judge with a history of major marijuana abuse. They could tell because he kept giggling, I'm guessing.

Imelda Marcos says the new fraud charges against her are a witch hunt. Yup.

Speaking of the free market, the Pentagon has been buying up all the civilian satellite images of Afghanistan. Not because they need them for operational purposes--the Pentagon has 7 satellites including 4 Keyhole satellites over Afghanistan, which are better than the civilian ones. Let me give you a hint: they started this policy last Thursday, when they first bombed a large number of civilians. You're wondering why they didn't just order the satellite company not to sell any photos to news organizations? Yes they have the legal right to do that, but would have been challenged in court under the 1st Amendment by someone (at least I hope they would have been--the news networks were already amazingly supine before they started getting fan mail). It was easier just to buy everything (no I don't know the cost).

The military have also admitted targetting the leaders of Afghanistan's military, which they say is legitimate "decapitation" of command & control. By which definition the plane crashing into the Pentagon no longer counts as a terrorist act.

Saturday, October 13, 2001

The US has evidently given a security guarantee to Uzbekistan. Terrific.

The terrorism bill is moving rapidly towards becoming a law. Who knows what it'll turn out to have in it; not the Congress, which is being asked not to bother reading it (this is supported by chairman of the House Rules Cmte, David Dreier, who I've never heard of). This laziness extends to the newspapers. The Post yesterday (or the Times?) said that it was believed that the government could in practice hold foreigners indefinitely without charges, despite the theoretical deletion of that provision. What's the loophole? The paper didn't say. Russ Feingold had 3 amendments. What were they? Who knows? (It's not on his website either). One had to do with the definition of a cyber-terrorist, which is now anyone who accesses a computer without authorization. I assume all the definitions of new crimes are equally vague, since the one about harboring a terrorist doesn't require any proof of knowledge of any actual
terrorism.

There's a piece below from the Sunday Times by John Le Carre. There is also a good long piece about how Arab countries got the way they are by Fareed Zakaria (www.sunday-times.co.uk, the terrorism section).

Has anyone noticed that Bin Laden still hasn't claimed credit. In fact, his son just denied it.

Saturday's Post has a story whose headline is that Afghanistan isn't just being bombed, but they're smart bombs hitting select targets. Guess that got out there before a smart bomb (and it was a smart bomb) missed it's target by, literally, a mile and took out a village in a poor neighborhood.

I saw a tiny bit of the footage of Dubya continuing to read to children on 9/11. It was on MSNBC and I tuned in just at the wrong time to see much. There were a bunch of reporters and they all knew what was going on and, horrifyingly, started asking Bush about it the second he closed the book, in front of all those children.

Medical tampering in God's domain story of the week: It is possible to transplant working wombs into infertile women. You'd transplant it in from a relative or a hysterectomy patient, have a child or two, and then get rid of it (so you wouldn't have to remain on anti-rejection medication).

It's official: Hollywood is all out of ideas. Despite fewer films than ever being green-lighted, one of them is a version of Hawaii Five-0.

Friday, October 12, 2001

The moron / the war

A nauseating editorial in today's NY Times, "Mr Bush's New Gravitas." It follows what Bush has been saying to his staff, which is that nothing the administration was doing before 9/11 counts anymore (except for drilling in Alaska--that's evidently now a national security issue. Oh, and Son of Star Wars). No no, you only get one do-over in life, and then only if you're white and rich, and he got his at age 40. If Clinton was the
Come-back Kid, Bush is the Etch-a-Sketch Kid.

Asked about Saddam Hussein at his press conference, Bush said that he was an evil man because "he gassed his own people." Right, what was it you used in Texas--electric chair, lethal injection? Mr. Humanitarian, all of a sudden.

Thursday, October 11, 2001

Evil-doers

NY Times headline: "Stock Market Shrugs Off Airstrikes". Who called in airstrikes on the stock market? I mean it's a great idea, don't get me wrong....

That widow will not be deported as an illegal alien. They still plan to take more of her death benefits so she won't be able to afford her mortgage, but lawyers are donating their services on that one.

According to a driver trying to cash in, or perhaps this is inspired by those frat guys at the CIA, some of those hijackers had hookers in their rooms. And, to answer the question you're all asking: 20 minutes.

Speaking of those fun-loving frat guys, do you think they believed that all the news networks would fall for that line about encoded messages? It actually worked, though. CNN promised not to run any more bin Laden et al tapes without asking permission from the government first, and everyone else pretty much followed.

Still more embarrassing than that America Strikes Back thing is how the news channels switched so completely from covering the war to those anthrax cases.

Finally, a quote from Arnold Toynbee from 1954, from a review of the Penguin Dictionary of Modern Humorous Quotes, which sounds like it would be a great gift, a great gift for someone to buy for me, if I was being too subtle earlier in this sentence: "America is a large friendly dog in a small room. Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a chair."

The US is dropping cluster bombs on Afghanistan. Which means children will die when picking up the brightly colored unexploded ordinance (5-12% of the bombs dropped).

I'd have to say Bush has indeed managed to kill more foreigners than Americans now. Within a couple of days he should reach the next plateau, when he kills the same proportion of the Afghan population as died in the terrorist attacks.

At his press conference today, how many times did he use the phrase "evil-doers"? I think he's channeling Adam West as Batman talking about the Penguin.

Tuesday, October 09, 2001

Moron's War


Within an hour of 9/11, someone in a British department was sending a memo to the minister suggesting that now was a great time to release embarrassing information. And they did.

Bush says that his act represents the collective will of the world. Odd, I didn't think it was a UN operation. No, the thing about decision-making in the global world is that it's like the 19th century (or at least 19th-century Britain): a tiny electorate, all rich.

So evidently America Strikes Back. This is the title on the graphic at CNN. And MSNBC. And Fox News. And McNeil-Lehrer. There's nothing like unanimous jingoism.

Ashcroft says that we should be alert to our surroundings. For example, Bush just realized that he lives in the White House now. And don't think he wasn't surprised.

According to the bin Laden tape, the world is now divided between believers and infidels. Great, as long as I don't have to be on the side of either Bush or bin Laden. Go infidels! My peeps!

Finally: Rush Limbaugh is a big fat deaf idiot.

Morons' Crusade

The Taliban Ambassador to Pakistan, looking pointedly at Pakistan, said "Afghans are never prepared to compromise their religion and their honor for money." He later corrected the statement, saying "I meant to say `asked,' not `prepared.' What's up with that?"

A Guardian columnist considers the way the CIA & FBI are puffing up the bin Ladinettes to be excessive. Poison gas, germ warfare, nuclear weapons. Sure they've got all that stuff. But they brought down those skyscrapers with a few penknives. But how can you defend upping the CIA budget 9% to defend against that. So they have to turn him into Ernst Stavro Blofeld (I know I used the Blofeld thing last month, but the Guardian got there 3 weeks late. Actually, I used Darth Vader in '98, and I was saving Lex Luthor for whenever it seemed appropriate. Did you notice Congress decided not to investigate the CIA on how they failed so abysmally? Cause the CIA has always done so well when allowed to regulate itself in the past.

The Slate tries to guess what the hell bin Laden was talking about in his video, like what happened 80 years ago that was so bad. Who knows, really, what the hell he thinks. His head is so full of weird ideas you'd think he gets the internet in that cave. A reporter who interviewed him a while back says he thought that some US states might secede because of Washington's support of Israel.

Monday, October 08, 2001

I facetiously asked what was written on the sides of the bombs. As it turns out, "NYPD".

I could go two ways at this point: either a joke about Dennis Franz's ass, or a reference to "Guiliani Time"--extra points if I work in a mention of a plunger.

Sunday, October 07, 2001

Morons with missiles

To war, to war, Fredonia's going to war.

Would it have been so hard for Tony Blair not to have participated in the first day, when the reporter Yvonne Ridley had been released but was not yet out of Afghanistan?

A new book is due out trashing Clinton for his actions in his last days, written by Barbara Olson. Terrif.

Yes, I'm sure dropping a few aid packages with big notices that they are gifts from the American people will really win over the Afghan people. What's written on the sides of the bombs?

I remember suggesting a pool for when Bush would have killed more foreigners than he has Americans (actually, a comedian I saw on tv said that he wasn't worried about that--Bush was just executing Texans, right?). Did anyone have this week? New pool: when will he have killed more people than he claims bin Laden has.

The FBI went after the American web-site of the Real IRA
(motto: Really!). It was raising funds.

A piece in the Guardian used the term Western Fundamentalism, which I rather like. Its key characteristics mirror those it complains about from bin Laden: unquestioned belief in its own superiority; assertion of universal applicability of its values; lack of will to understand what is different from it.

The problem there, though, is that the Morons Crusade is a step back from an attempt to impose Western beliefs and values. Well, it is and it isn't. We do hear about the Taliban's treatment of women, which hasn't noticably exercised anyone in the US government the last few years (although not about its tendency to drop walls onto homosexuals), but it's not like we're going to care what the next Afghanistan gov does with its women, any more than we pressured the Saudis to let women drive or Kuwait to let them vote. Western values may be a stick with which to beat the
wogs, but it's not like we care that much about it in principle. See an article in the Village Voice (villagevoice.com) on treatment of homosexuals by our new bestest friends. Similarly, we cared so much about the Taliban's cultivation in poppy, but didn't applaud them when they stopped it, or note that our other new bestest friends the Northern Alliance now produces 90% of it. Think anyone will object to Pakistani president for life Musharaf grabbing more power and jailing his opposition, as he did today? Think anyone will suggest to the Saudi leaders that they'd have less opposition if they were less blatantly corrupt? Oh, whatever, I've lost my train of thought and I need a nap. Happy Indigenous Peoples Day, everyone!

Saturday, October 06, 2001

So when they finally identify the bodies of the hijackers, do they give them back? So far, they're trying their damndest not to identify them, but it'll have to happen.

The US (Ashcroft, at least) is pissed at Britain for requiring that anyone it extradites not be executed, as required under European law.

But we are happy to send them back the widow of one of their citizens. The couple had lived in the US I believe 8 years and had 3 sons here. Since they were here on his work visa, the INS told her, two days after he was killed in the World Trade Center because he made sure children and people in wheelchairs got out first, that she would be deported. And they plan to keep 60% of the life insurance too.

On the day Sharon was doing his poor little Czechoslovakia act, he also sent quite a few troops and tanks into Poland. I mean the West Bank.

Has the bipartisan consensus ended yet? Cause I'm getting bored. And because Bush wants to give tens of billions in tax breaks, permanent ones, to the healthiest corporations, just like his airline bailout didn't distinguish between healthy and dying airlines. It's all free money, after all. See the thing is, Bush believes in free money, because it always has been. When he wanted to go into the oil business, his father's friends gave him lots to play with and didn't ask for it back when he lost
it. When he wanted the value of his baseball team to increase
dramatically, the good people of wherever it was decided to raise their sales tax so that he could be a millionaire.

Thursday, October 04, 2001

Gregory Hemingway, son of Ernest, has died, in the Miami Women’s Detention Center. That probably requires some explanation. I know he liked dressing in women's clothing, but he was found wandering around naked, so I'm guessing even the Miami police could tell the difference.

Chinese immigrants to Australia don't die. Only 6 out of 55,000 in the last 10 years. It's assumed their identities are being passed on, but where the hell are the bodies?

Wednesday, October 03, 2001

No need for additional evidence

There must be convincing evidence of bin Laden's guilt. Tony Blair says so.

Although it seems that we're actually beyond the proof phase. This is a technique I have commented on before, adopted from Bush the Elder in relation to Iran-Contra, when he couldn't tell what he knew, couldn't tell what he knew, couldn't tell what he knew, and then, whoops, now it was ancient history and he wouldn't dwell on the past. Yesterday I heard Rumsfeld saying that there was convincing evidence that we should all have been convinced of by now. Rummy: "There is no need for additional evidence." As Alice said to the Mad Hatter, how can I have additional evidence when I haven't had any yet?

The Car Show website has a list of the top 10 gay cars.

The Taliban still want to negotiate with the US over bin Laden. I foresee a Solomonic compromise....

The House intelligence committee calls for a "cultural revolution" at the FBI and CIA. Cool, let's send them into the countryside to learn from the peasants.

For those playing along at home, the last 3 items contain one literary, one religious and one historical reference.

Monday, October 01, 2001

A woman in Britain is suing her (private) school for loss of future earnings because they inadequately taught her Latin. She's going to be a lawyer.

Al Kamen's column in the Post says that the Christian Coalition, under the headline Protect Your Family, says that defending against terrorists isn't enough, you need to give them $23 a month for a porn filter.

Oddly enough, they may be right. An article in the Guardian on the Blair government's proposals, like Bush's, to be able to decrypt any e-mail, it says that actually the bin Ladinistas avoided using decryption, which would just have drawn attention to themselves. Instead, they embedded their messages in porn image files.

What is it with the South African government and bogus AIDS cures? A company owned by the government has been testing one such cure, made from burnt coal, on Tanzanian soldiers. Or were until the Tanzanian government caught them doing it.

I've been reminded that Pakistan's military leader is one of those whose name Bush was unable to come up with when a reporter gave him that pop quiz last year. Remember how some people derided the idea that he'd ever need to know that name, which I seem to recall he guessed as "Mr. General."