The people of Oklahoma do not have blood on their hands

Oklahoma Gov. Mary Fallin wrote a defense of the botchecution of Clayton Lockett, and the only true sentence in it came right at the beginning: “(Warning: this column contains descriptions of a violent crime and is unsuitable for children)”.

She does admit one thing and only one thing wrong about the botchecution: “the process of death by lethal injection took too long.” Delayed the after-party, and we can’t have that: the champagne went all flat.

She complains that “Some anti-death penalty advocates have even gone so far as to say that all Oklahomans have blood on their hands.” In the next sentence she calls them “out-of-state pundits,” smugly implying that every single person in Oklahoma is as comfortable as she is with torturing people to death, which if true would provide a clue to the identity of the liquid on their hands.

“Justice was served,” Gov. Fallin claims. “The people of Oklahoma do not have blood on their hands. They saw Clayton Lockett for what he was: evil. His execution means he will never again harm or terrorize another person.” Unlike yourself, governor.

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Oklafuckinghoma

So not only did Oklahoma botchecute Clayton Lockett, they also tased him that day (why were they trying to x-ray him anyway?), and the IV was stuck in his groin (and then covered with a sheet, which is why they didn’t notice it wasn’t working correctly). And they ran out of their death drugs, so they couldn’t have completed the execution even if they could have found a usable vein.

Says Gov. Mary Fallin, choosing her subordinate, the commissioner of public safety, to conduct an “independent” investigation of the botchecution, “We need to take as long as possible to get the answer right.” I’m sure no one can take as long to get the right answer as you can, Gov. Fallin.

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It’s all about standards, people

Jay “Hey Rube” Carney weighs in on the Oklahoma execution debacle: “We have a fundamental standard in this country that even when the death penalty is justified, it must be carried out humanely.” Also, drone strikes must be carried out gracefully and genocide must be carried out prettily.

Some adjectives don’t belong with some nouns, is what I’m saying.

Also, too, the death penalty is never “justified.”

(Correction: Clayton Lockett did not say “Something’s wrong” during his botched execution. The AP reporter now says that was a guard. He did say, “Oh, man,” which seems equally appropriate.)

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Something’s wrong

Last week the Oklahoma Supreme Court ruled that death row prisoners couldn’t prove “actual injury” caused by the state’s keeping secret the source and makeup of the drugs they planned to use in their executions.

Today, Oklahoma fucked up the first of those executions. Clayton Lockett was still convulsing and trying to speak after they claimed he was unconscious (“Something’s wrong,” according to one report), so after a bit they admitted they’d only partially executed him and called a halt, but 20 minutes later he had a heart attack and died. All in all, it took nearly 45 minutes to torture him to death. The state blamed the botched execution on “vein failure,” because it certainly couldn’t have had anything to do with the Mystery Death Chemicals they were trying to put in his failed vein. Imagine, by the way, what sort of condition Lockett would have been in if he hadn’t had that unexpected heart attack after they’d stopped trying to kill him, with three poisonous drugs running through his body, but not in large enough quantities to do the job.

They didn’t give him the last meal he asked for either. Evidently there’s a $15 limit.

They decided not to go ahead with the second execution, also scheduled for today. I think that guy can prove “actual injury” now, although maybe not to the satisfaction of the fucking Oklahoma Supreme Court.

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