Today -100: July 6, 1911: Of war clouds and heat waves

Turkey’s troops are mobilized in preparation for a war against Montenegro.

So that’s two war scares in Europe, including the one over Morocco. French funds are being withdrawn from German banks.

Major heat wave all across the US. Stories from everywhere about people dropping dead by the hundreds (250, anyway). Life and death before air conditioning.

Habeas corpus

The latest squabbling within the Israeli government is over just which corpses of Palestinians might or might not be turned over to the Palestinian Authority. The government has decided to hold off on the transfer to keep the bodies – some of them Hamas militants killed as long ago as the 1990s – hostage until Gilad Shalit is released. Charming.

Today -100: July 5, 1911: Of race riots and flies

In Hell’s Kitchen, Independence Day was celebrated with a “race riot.” Instigated by the area’s “old timers” who resent the encroachment of Austrian immigrants.

Headline of the Day -100: “Boys Killed 1,250,000 Flies.” A contest in San Antonio. Robert Basse (no age given) won the $10 prize with 484,320 flies.

Visual aids

Reuters: “A mine-awareness team in Uganda was horrified to find an unexploded bomb being used as a bell when it visited a school to teach children how to spot bombs.”

Today -100: July 4, 1911: Of 4th of July torpedoes, Channel crossings, disagreeable surprises, and negro taints

4th of July Story of the, Um, Day -100: Simon Fisher, 46, of Chicago, mistook a 4th of July torpedo (some sort of firecracker, I presume) for a piece of candy. “The ensuing explosion blew away his jaw, inflicting a probably fatal wound.” There’s probably a lesson in there, somewhere.

Taft says in a speech to old soldiers, that all the foreign wars waged by the US, except the Revolution and maybe the Civil War, could have been avoided through arbitration.

The NYT notes that the English Channel was crossed by airplane for the first time only a few months ago, but yesterday eleven planes made the flight from France to England in the space of an hour, which is a great achievement but also a little “disquieting,” given the military implications. “Fortunately, improved instruments for making war do not increase the frequency of wars, but have an opposite tendency. Real wholesale slaughter as a part of the everyday business of life ended when men stopped fighting each other with short swords.” So that’s okay, then.

France expresses “disagreeable surprise” over the German gunboat Panther’s appearance at Agadir.

Headline of the Day -100: “Not Afraid of Negro Taint.” While John B. Collins of St Louis is suing his wife Cora for annulment on the charge that she has some negro blood, her sister Blanche is engaged to automobile dealer Charles Wass, who laughs in the face of negro taints.

Because nothing says austerity like Silvio Berlusconi

The Italian cabinet approves an austerity budget. Henceforth, Berlusconi will throw simple bunga parties.

Ed Miliband Ed Miliband Ed Miliband Ed Miliband Ed Miliband Ed Miliband

My British readers will have seen this interview with Labour leader Ed Miliband last week, in which Ed repeats precisely the same answer about the one-day civil servants’ strike (wrong at this time when negotiations are still going on, the government’s been provocative too, everyone should just get round the table) over and over, expecting it to be cut down to a 10-second soundbite, rather than stuck up on YouTube in all its 2½ minute glory.



Kind of hypnotic, isn’t it?

The ITN interviewer Damon Green has described the whole surreal experience online: “I had an opportunity to ask one last question. I had an urge to say something so stupid, so flippant that he would either have to answer it, or get up and leave. ‘What is the world’s fastest fish?’ ‘Can your dog do tricks?’ ‘Which is your favourite dinosaur?’”

Although obviously Ed Miliband is his own favorite dinosaur.

Education Minister Michael Gove has been criticizing teachers for daring to go on strike, because it is essential that children never miss a single day of school.

Schools were closed for the royal wedding.

The Daily Mail charmingly agrees with Gove:


The sailfish, by the way, is the world’s fastest fish.

Today -100: July 3, 1911: Of serial killers, Sunday speeches, gunboats, pinochle students, and fat men

The Atlanta serial killer has done it again, for the 8th Sunday in a row. Here’s how the NYT alluded to rape in 1911: “It appears that the murder is not committed after the accomplishment of the crime for which negroes are so frequently lynched.”

Taft was traveling yesterday, and crowds showed up each place his train stopped, but he wouldn’t make any speeches because he does not believe in making speeches on Sunday. And it’s too hot.

The German gunboat Panther may or may not have landed troops in Agadir. The semi-official line from Germany now is that the Panther will stay until the French and Spanish troops leave Morocco, which if France and Spain have their way will be never, so the alternative is that Germany also wants a piece of the country if it winds up being partitioned by the European powers. The days when there were still huge swaths of Africa unclaimed as colonies are 30 years in the past, so the competition for the remaining bits is especially fierce. Countries without boots on the ground are also involved: Britain doesn’t want Morocco, but neither does it want Germans sitting on a major port near Gibraltar.

The Federation of American Zionists held its 14th annual convention and discussed plans to purchase 100,000 acres of land in Palestine annually to establish Jewish colonies.

A Bronx gang, the Bergen gang, fight cops in a park where they went “to break up the outing of the Pinochle Students, a Bronx organization”. Sadly, I don’t think the Pinochle Students is the name of a rival gang, as retro-cool as that would be.

Headline of the Day -100: “Fat Men Play Baseball.” The Fat Men’s Club played the East River Pretzel Club. The temperature’s about 100°, is this wise? Unfortunately, Alderman Frank Detzler, the pitcher and 381-pound president of the Fat Men’s Club, dropped the ball, which fell in a swampy spot. Alderman Detzler went to retrieve it, started sinking, and had to be pulled out by the other Fat Men. Maybe all those silent Keystone comedies were really documentaries.

Today -100: July 2, 1911: Of earthquakes, gunboats, pocket moving pictures, crazy Moros, Taft’s soup, bananas, balloons, and hippopotamus skin

Earthquake in San Francisco, the largest since ‘06. No serious damage to buildings, but thousands of underpants need discarding. One man dies of fright. Stronger in Sacramento and Carson City.

Germany sends a gunboat, the Panther, to Agadir, Morocco, with 120 men, ostensibly to protect German businesses and nationals. France is upset because Morocco is mine! mine! mine! Well, technically France is still pretending that its troops are just trying to restore order in Morocco, not to complete its collection of North African colonies, so it’s reduced to complaining that the German move violates a 1909 agreement that Germany has pre-eminent commercial interests in Morocco and France pre-eminent political ones.

A new fad in Berlin: “pocket moving pictures.” You have yourself filmed briefly by a movie camera. Then you can walk around with a box containing a roll of photographs derived from the film, and you turn a crank very quickly to make the photos appear to be moving. All the cool kidz are getting them. Someone plans to import this novelty into the US. I predict it’ll be huge.

Headline of the Day -100: “Kills Crazy Moro and is Commended.” Private John Bonnell of the 2nd Cavalry, in the Sulu province of the Philippines (little-known fact: all provinces in the Philippines are named after Star Trek characters) (c’mon, we were all thinking it), shoots dead a “religion crazed Mohammedan Moro” who had just killed Lt. Walter Rodney. In a letter to his father, Priv. Bonnell (“I like soldiering in Sulu. We have exciting times as the tribes of the Moros are nothing but savages”) writes that not only is he getting a letter of commendation, but also the bloody bolo with which the “wild Moro” killed Lt. Rodney.

Other Headline of the Day -100: “Master Berri Didn’t Step in Taft’s Soup.” And he has a letter from the president to prove it.

Other Other Headline of the Day -100: “Slips on Banana Peel, Dying.” In NY Central Railroad Station, William Buick, evidently a pioneer in slapstick comedy, suffered the fate of all too many pioneers.

Yet Another Headline of the Day -100, because it’s just that kind of day: “Thief Escapes in Balloon.” A pickpocket. An awesome pickpocket. I wonder how many hot air balloon hijackings there have ever been?

A thief who doesn’t escape: Marie Amadeo, Baron Delord, son of the former King Amadeo I of Spain (r.1870-3) and nephew of the late king of Italy, pinched in Paris for trying to shoplift two bottles of scent and a dozen pairs of women’s stockings in a dry goods store. After a little research I can’t believe I took the time to do, I strongly doubt this guy is actually the son of King Amadeo (illegitimate son, which you’d have to read the NYT story quite carefully to realize they were saying).

The US Navy launches its first airplane, a hydroplane, and qualifies its first pilot.

Headline of, oh, you know: “Old Caliph’s Skin a Museum Exhibit.” Does it make this story more weird or less weird that Caliph was a hippopotamus? I can’t decide.

South Dakota can’t degrade pregnant women as human beings, says some killjoy judge

Eighth Circuit Judge Karen Schreier grants an injunction against South Dakota’s anti-abortion bill (which I discussed here and here).

It should be remembered that the supposed justification for this law was to prevent weak-minded females being coerced into abortions against their will. Judge Schreier seems not to share this view of women:

Forcing a woman to divulge to a stranger at a pregnancy help center the fact that she has chosen to undergo an abortion humiliates and degrades her as a human being. The woman will feel degraded by the compulsive nature of the Pregnancy Help Center requirements, which suggest that she has made the ‘wrong’ decision, has not really ‘thought’ about her decision to undergo an abortion, or is ‘not intelligent enough’ to make the decision with the advice of a physician. Furthermore, these women are forced into a hostile environment. ... a woman who chooses to undergo an abortion will experience a high degree of degradation because she will be forced to disclose her decision to someone who is fundamentally opposed to it. Women will also be afraid of being berated, belittled, or confronted about their decision, being subsequently contacted by the pregnancy help center, and having their decision to have an abortion become public information.

Today -100: July 1, 1911: Of unshocking dances

Headline of the Day -100: “Police Not Shocked By Russian Dances.” NY Mayor Gaynor sent the police to the Winter Garden to stop the performance of purportedly lewd Russian ballets, but either they had cleaned up their act or the police were just not as easily outraged as the people who had written the mayor, so the dancing will continue.

Today -100: June 30, 1911: Of wire

The US Grand Jury hands down indictments for 83 members of the Wire Trust for violations of the Sherman Anti-Trust Act. The Wire Trust centers on the American Steel and Wire Company, a subsidiary of US Steel. The men are charged with forming an unlawful combination and conspiracy to fix the price of wire at artificially high levels, “to the great and irreparable injury and detriment, financial and moral, of the people of the United States.” Moral?

The NYT weighs in on the subject of “The Negro as a Policeman,” following the NYPD’s hiring of one. It bows to negroes’ “theoretical right to such appointments” but suggests that the greater difficulties they will meet makes hiring them “injudicious as regards the public interest.”

Obama press conference: I’ll keep on giving you the same answer until I give you a different one

Obama held one of his increasingly rare press conferences today.

He’s still talking about the need to “tackle spending in the tax code” after both Jon Stewart and I made fun of the phrase.

Evidently the deficit (he said we need $4 trillion in deficit reduction, but didn’t say where that figure came from – it came from the Republicans) is the fault of tax breaks for corporate jets, which he mentioned six times. Unless we get rid of that tax break, we’ll have to throw kids out of college, end medical research and compromise food safety. He says we have to make tough decisions like that. Also, oil companies should pay some damned taxes, for once.

Fortunately, he thinks it’s entirely possible that a bipartisan deal can be done, because “there is a conceptual framework that would allow us to make huge progress on our debt and deficit, and do so in a way that does not hurt our economy right here and right now.” Wow, there’s a conceptual framework? Why didn’t you say so before?


UM, NOBODY? “Nobody wants to put the creditworthiness of the United States in jeopardy. Nobody wants to see the United States default.”

First question: how do you get a “balanced approach” including tax increases, when Boehner says no way, no how? Obama says that “in Washington... a lot of people say a lot of things to satisfy their base or to get on cable news, but that hopefully, leaders at a certain point rise to the occasion and they do the right thing for the American people.” Oh dear God, we’re doomed.

OKAY, YOU’RE NAIVE: “And that’s what I expect to happen this time. Call me naïve, but my expectation is that leaders are going to lead.” Or just not paying attention.


REPUBLICANS ARE ALWAYS PREPARED TO DO THE HARD THING: “So the question is, if everybody else is willing to take on their sacred cows and do tough things in order to achieve the goal of real deficit reduction, then I think it would be hard for the Republicans to stand there and say that the tax break for corporate jets is sufficiently important that we’re not willing to come to the table and get a deal done. Or, we’re so concerned about protecting oil and gas subsidies for oil companies that are making money hand over fist -- that’s the reason we’re not going to come to a deal.”

He thinks that position isn’t “sustainable,” and even quotes several Republicans who think it’s not sustainable. Unfortunately, none of those Republicans, like Alan Simpson and Pete Domenici, actually currently hold elective office.

IF THIS WERE A LITTLE GIRL WITH A LISP TALKING ABOUT SANTA CLAUS, IT WOULD BE ADORABLE: “And my belief is, is that the Republican leadership in Congress will, hopefully sooner rather than later, come to the conclusion that they need to make the right decisions for the country... My expectation is that they’ll do the responsible thing.” He genuinely still thinks he can shame Republicans into acting like adults. That’s his negotiating strategy.

That’s not naive, that’s out of touch with reality on a Bushian scale.


Q: What about that War Powers Act? “I want to talk about the substance of Libya because there’s been all kinds of noise about process and congressional consultation and so forth.”

Noise.

“we’ve protected thousands of people in Libya; we have not seen a single U.S. casualty; there’s no risks of additional escalation. This operation is limited in time and in scope. ... And throughout this process we consulted with Congress.”

Consult >verb 1 seek information or advice from. 2 seek permission or approval from.

“So a lot of this fuss is politics.”

Fuss.

He says you need to look at the history of the War Powers Act, which was enacted after the Vietnamese War, so if the kinetic whatsit in question isn’t exactly like Vietnam, the Act clearly doesn’t even apply.

“We have engaged in a limited operation to help a lot of people against one of the worst tyrants in the world -- somebody who nobody should want to defend...” Because if you question his unilateral war, you’re clearly defending Qaddafi. “-- and we should be sending a unified message to this guy that he should step down and give his people a fair chance to live their lives without fear. And this suddenly becomes the cause célèbre for some folks in Congress? Come on.”

Noise. Fuss. Cause célèbre. George Bush could not have been more contemptuously dismissive.


On the McCain-Kerry proposal for a one-year authorization of war in Libya: “I think when you have the former Republican nominee for President, John McCain, and the former nominee for President on the Democratic side, John Kerry, coming together to support what we’re doing in Libya, that should tell the American people that this is important.” Yeah, nothing says “important” like John McCain supporting it.

THAT’S WHAT STATES ARE FOR: “this administration, under my direction, has consistently said we cannot discriminate as a country against people based on sexual orientation.”

He said gay marriage in NY is “a good thing, because what you saw was the people of New York having a debate, talking through these issues. ... I think it is important for us to work through these issues...” Christ, it’s about establishing civil rights, not group therapy. “...because each community is going to be different and each state is going to be different.” For example, in some communities and states, homosexuals will be second-class citizens. And that’s exactly how Obama thinks things should work.

Well, fuck that.

CALL ME NAIVE, BUT MY EXPECTATION IS THAT LEADERS ARE GOING TO LEAD: “it turns out that the president, I’ve discovered since I’ve been in office, can’t dictate precisely how this process moves.” But he can bomb Libya or any other country he wants; funny, that.

A GOOD THING: “But I think we’re moving in a direction of greater equality and I think that’s a good thing.”

Asked later about his evolving personal views on gay marriage: “I’ll keep on giving you the same answer until I give you a different one, all right?”


On the NRLB’s decision preventing Boeing moving a plant to South Carolina to break the unions, he worked very hard to avoid taking a side, saying “we can’t afford to have labor and management fighting all the time”.

Fox’s Mike Emanuel tried to make Obama use the word “victory” as his objective in Afghanistan. He wouldn’t.

He says Qaddafi committed war crimes, which is odd because he just got through saying that this isn’t a war, including “potentially using rape as a weapon of war.” I guess inserting the word “potentially” allows him to keep using a discredited charge.

NEEDS:

Q: Would you accept a political settlement with him involved as success from the American perspective?

Obama: I would accept him stepping down so that he is not directing armed forces against the Libyan people. He needs to step down. He needs to go.

More debt limit stuff. Flashing yellow lights, hard deadlines, “Malia and Sasha generally finish their homework a day ahead of time. Malia is 13, Sasha is 10.” So fuck you Eric Cantor.

And, yes, he got his own kid’s age wrong, but at least he knows the difference between a fake cowboy and a killer clown. Although he’d probably think John Wayne Gacy could be shamed into doing what Obama wants if he just uses the word “responsible” enough.

“At a certain point, they need to do their job.” He thinks raising the debt ceiling is their job; they think demagoging about the debt ceiling is their job.

THAT’S NOT WHAT THEY’RE CALLED: “Now is the time to go ahead and make the tough choices. That’s why they’re called leaders.”

WHAT HE’S BEEN DOING: “I’ve been doing Afghanistan and bin Laden and the Greek crisis.”


Then he talked about Americans who are losing their jobs and homes and contact lenses and whatnot. “And every day that weighs on me. Every minute of every day that weighs on me. ... And these folks are counting on us. They desperately want to believe that their leadership is thinking about them and not playing games.” Then he went to meet a women’s basketball team, but all that stuff was weighing on him every minute.

Unevolved

Last week we were told that Obama’s position on gay marriage was “evolving.” But not actually, you know, evolved. Monday, his spokesmodel Jay Carney announced that Obama now thinks it should be up to the states.

Which is intended to look like he’s not taking a position – he’ll be happy to be thought a wimp on this issue – but it actually is a position: a position that marriage equality is not a right but a privilege that can be granted or not granted at the whim of state legislators.

Well fuck that.

Today -100: June 29, 1911: Of heresies, vile or vulgar language, lynchings, and missing hands

In Socialist-run Milwaukee, the Catholic Archbishop declares socialism to be “a heresy and an evil, the viciousness of which is apparent to every thinking man.”

The Wheeling, VA city council passes an ordinance imposing a fine on anyone who uses vile or vulgar language in a public address. It is aimed at Billy Sunday, who has a revival scheduled.

Judge Brand says that he knew the two black men would be lynched if they were returned to Walton County, Georgia for trial in his court without troops protecting them as he ordered (see yesterday), but says he refused to request those troops because “I don’t propose to be the engine of sacrificing any white man’s life for all such negro criminals in the country. ... I would not imperil the life of one white man to save the lives of a hundred such negroes.” He does say that he opposes lynching. So that’s okay then.

Samuel Battle, the first black man ever hired by the NYPD, begins patrolling (there are two other black cops, who were hired by the Brooklyn PD and absorbed into the NYPD when Brooklyn was annexed by NYC).

Headline of the Day -100: “Hand Blown Off at Wedding.”

Quote of the Day

“Patients should never have to use a tambourine. I also understand anecdotally that maracas were used which was unacceptable.” Damned socialized medicine.

More than the normal techniques

I missed this last week (as did the NYT): at his confirmation hearings to be Director of Central Intelligence, David Petraeus called for the use of torture (or, as he called it, “more than the normal techniques”), but only for, like, “a ticking time bomb scenario.” So it’s good that we’re putting him in charge of the CIA’s secret prisons.

Also, when was the last time a time bomb actually ticked?

Outgunned

Dennis Poust, spokesmodel for the NY State Catholic Conference, on marriage equality: “In many ways, we were outgunned.” Is that a euphemism? That’s a euphemism, isn’t it?

Today -100: June 28, 1911: Of trusts, masonic governments, and lynchings

The US government is suing to dissolve the “magazine trust,” the Periodical Clearing House, for violating the Sherman Anti-Trust Act through a conspiracy to restrain price competition in the sales of periodicals.

In other trust news, a congressional committee investigating the Sugar Trust hears from Joseph Smith, president of both the Mormon church and the Utah-Idaho Sugar Company, which is linked to the trust. The Utah-Idaho Sugar Company employs Japanese to raise its sugar beets.

The bishop of Beja, Portugal attacks the “Masonic government of Portugal” and hopes that it will be overthrown by a return of the monarchy.

“Because [Georgia] Gov. Joseph M. Brown, Judge Charles H. Brand, and Sheriff Stark refused to use the troops to protect them, Tom Allen and Joe Watts, negroes, were lynched in Walton County to-day.” Allen was accused, with little evidence, of attacking a white woman, and Watts of being his accomplice. When Allen’s trial was originally scheduled to begin, he was brought to Monroe, GA with troops for protection. The judge disliked that and made a speech saying that the presence of the troops was an implied insult to the town – then he postponed the trial in a fit of pique. When he did hold the trial, the governor called to ask if he wanted troops (it was not exactly a secret that a lynching was in the offing). He told the governor to ask the sheriff, who said to ask the judge. So no troops, and when Allen was brought back to Monroe from Atlanta for the trial, he was taken off the train, tied to a nearby telegraph pole and shot. The mob then marched 6 miles to town, unmasked, stormed the jail to seize Watts, hanged him on a tree and shot him. This is not the first time a black man up before Judge Brand has been lynched after Brand refused to request troops; indeed, it’s not even the first time this year.

What you missed this weekend

Oh sure, you had your gay pride thingies, but did they have El Colacho, a dude dressed as the Devil, jumping over a bunch of babies?


Well, they did at the Burgos, Spain, Baby Jumping Festival yesterday, as they have every Corpus Christi since 1620.

And did they have competitive snuff-sniffing?


Well, they did at the German Snuff-Sniffing Championships in Kucha, Bavaria Saturday.


Now if they only combined snuff-sniffing and baby-jumping...

Today -100: June 27, 1911: Of stranglers

Atlanta evidently has a serial killer. On each of the last six Sundays a black woman has been found strangled and mutilated.

Caption contest

John McCain tweeted this picture of himself and John Kerry at the Coca Cola plant in Cairo (the 3rd dude is the CEO of General Electric).


So that’s a McCain and Kerry at Coke in Cairo caption contest. Extra points if you continue the “comical K sound” theme.

Today -100: June 26, 1911: Of blood sports

A baseball game in Bloomfield, NJ was delayed for an hour on account of cock-fight. Two roosters happened to meet in front of the grand stand (maybe all baseball parks had roosters in 1911, I don’t know) and they got into it, as roosters will, so the 300 spectators as well as the players decided to watch that instead, betting on the result (the big one killed the smaller one).

I once saw a newsletter or program, I don’t know what you’d call it, from a trans-Atlantic passenger ship from about this time, which listed the various moderately famous people in first class (including Herbert Hoover, I seem to recall) and the various events and entertainments – fancy-dress ball, shuffleboard tournament (or whatever), and yes, a cock-fight. Probably no one thought twice about it.

Mexico has expressed some displeasure at the lynching of a 14-year-old Mexican by a large mob in Thorndale, Texas and the failure of Texas authorities to arrest anyone for it.

Sexy Headline of the Day

NYT: “Euphoria in a City Where Gay Movement Was Born.”

Today -100: June 25, 1911: Of eccentric fashions, smallpox, and a really fat Delilah

In Bucharest, a woman is shot dead for wearing a harem skirt by her boyfriend, who “had often expressed strong views on eccentric fashions.”

Alaska is establishing quarantines to prevent prospectors bringing in smallpox from Dawson City (Canada).

A former member of the Canadian Parliament, J.G.H. Bergeron, who is accompanying the leader of the Conservative Party on a tour of the West campaigning against the tariff reciprocity treaty with the US, has caused an uproar by comparing Canadian Finance Minister Fielding and US President Taft to Sampson and Delilah, respectively. The problem is that in this analogy, Taft is a giiirrrrl, which is horribly insulting. “The incident is causing an uproar among settlers from the United States, and riots in future meetings are feared.”

Today -100: June 24, 1911: Of gubernatorial posses

There was already criticism of Oregon Gov. Oswald West’s program of putting convicts to work on roads. So when one of them escapes, the governor leads the posse that recaptures him.

Today -100: June 23, 1911: Of coronations and Christian Science

Over-Enthusiastic Headline of the Day -100: “Coronation is Most Splendid in All History.” George V’s. To crap novelist Marie Corelli, who wrote the story for the NYT, this over-priced spectacle proves that “England is loyal to the backbone, and Socialism no more than a ripple of discontent on a stagnant pool.” Supposed to be covering the coronation, she goes on and on about socialism.

A detective (private, I assume) for the NY County Medical Society went undercover to capture a rogue Christian Science practitioner for violating the medical law. The detective complained of a stomach ache. Julius Benjamin read her Bible passages and gave her a pamphlet. So she had him arrested.

Obama’s Afghanistan speech: We will not try to make Afghanistan a perfect place

Transcript.

9/11 in the first sentence. Very Giulianiesque.

U.S. MOTTO: ROUTING THE TALIBAN SINCE 2001: “In the days that followed, our nation was united as we struck at al Qaeda and routed the Tahleebhan in Afghanistan.” Just has to stress that second syllable, doesn’t he?

SPENT ENORMOUS BLOOD: “Then, our focus shifted. A second war was launched in Iraq, and we spent enormous blood and treasure to support a new government there.”

EIGHTH, ACTUALLY, BUT DOESN’T TIME FLY WHEN YOU’RE HAVING FUN? “By the time I took office, the war in Afghanistan had entered its seventh year.”

WHAT WE ARE MEETING: “Thanks to our men and women in uniform, our civilian personnel, and our many coalition partners, we are meeting our goals.” For some reason, he offers no proof of this.

So he’s offering to reverse the 2009 “surge,” i.e., to reduce the number of troops he has in Afghanistan to the number there were when he took office, by, oh, just about election day. “After this initial reduction, our troops will continue coming home at a steady pace as Afghan Security forces move into the lead.” A steady pace. Could mean 10,000 a year, could mean 3 a year. But at least it’ll be steady.

ALSO, LIFT AND SEPARATE: “Our mission will change from combat to support. By 2014, this process of transition will be complete, and the Afghan people will be responsible for their own security.”

TAKE OUT MENU: “Together with the Pakistanis, we have taken out more than half of al Qaeda’s leadership.” Although in the Pakistanis’ case, this means taken more than half of Al Qaida’s leadership to dinner and a movie.

OH, AND DID I MENTION LATELY THAT WE KILLED BIN LADEN? “And thanks to our intelligence professionals and Special Forces, we killed Osama bin Laden, the only leader that al Qaeda had ever known. This was a victory for all who have served since 9/11. One soldier summed it up well. ‘The message,’ he said, ‘is we don’t forget. You will be held accountable, no matter how long it takes.’” Way to spin the complete failure to find bin Laden for a decade as a sign of American perseverance, one soldier.

WHERE WE HAVE PUT AL QAIDA: “But we have put al Qaeda on a path to defeat”.

SO YOU MIGHT WANT TO GET COMFORTABLE: “This is the beginning -- but not the end -- of our effort to wind down this war.”

He favors “initiatives that reconcile the Afghan people, including the Taliban.”

WHAT WE WILL NOT TRY: “We will not try to make Afghanistan a perfect place.”

ENDURES & ENSURES: “What we can do, and will do, is build a partnership with the Afghan people that endures -- one that ensures that we will be able to continue targeting terrorists and supporting a sovereign Afghan government.” Forever and ever and ever.

IS IT AT THE END OF A TUNNEL? “And even as there will be dark days ahead in Afghanistan, the light of a secure peace can be seen in the distance.”

NOTHING SAYS “ANCHOR OF GLOBAL SECURITY” LIKE BEING ENGAGED IN FIVE SIMULTANEOUS WARS: “Some would have America retreat from our responsibility as an anchor of global security, and embrace an isolation that ignores the very real threats that we face. Others would have America over-extend ourselves, confronting every evil that can be found abroad. We must chart a more centered course.” Phew, for a minute there I thought he’d advocate one of those less centered courses.

WHAT WE MUST EMBRACE: “Like generations before, we must embrace America’s singular role in the course of human events.” This is just a badly written speech. Who inserted the latter phrase, from the Declaration of Independence, in a sentence about embracing America’s singular role, whatever that means. Is it anything like American exceptionalism?

AS PRURIENT AS WE ARE PRIAPIC: “But we must be as pragmatic as we are passionate”. Just can’t resist an alliteration, can he? Also, could Obama possibly be less passionate about Afghanistan?

“In all that we do, we must remember that what sets America apart is not solely our power -- it is the principles upon which our union was founded. We are a nation that brings our enemies to justice while adhering to the rule of law”. For example, we shot bin Laden in the head and dumped his body in the ocean, but adhering to the rule of law.

WHAT WE STAND NOT FOR: “We stand not for empire, but for self-determination. That is why we have a stake in the democratic aspirations that are now washing across the Arab World. We will support those revolutions with fidelity to our ideals, with the power of our example, and with an unwavering belief that all human beings deserve to live with freedom and dignity.” Unless they live in Bahrain or someplace with oil or US military bases, obviously.

WHAT WE MUST RECAPTURE: “And most of all, after a decade of passionate debate, we must recapture the common purpose that we shared at the beginning of this time of war.” Revenge?

HEY KIDS, WHAT TIME IS IT? “America, it is time to focus on nation-building here at home.”

Kept saying we need to end the war “responsibly.” Responsible to whom, he did not say.

Another Obama speech with no obvious purpose. If he meant to inform us of his vague timetable for troop reductions (what will the 2014 transition from combat to support mean for troop levels, when if ever will all troops be out of Afghanistan?), a three-sentence press release could have handled it. If he was looking for the active support of the American people for something, I missed hearing that call. I think the upshot was that the war is kind of slowly winding down – he actually used the phrase winding down! – so if we all stopped thinking about it and talking about, that would be okay with him, and it’ll probably all turn out more or less okay.

Today -100: June 22, 1911: Of peonage

Taft pardons managers of the Jackson Lumber Company of Lockhart, Alabama who were convicted for peonage (i.e., keeping 186 foreign workers, Germans I think, against their will in conditions of slavery).

Hostilities, redux

The US military’s rules of engagement in Libya “considers
the turning on of air-defense radar in a no-fly zone to be a ‘hostile act’”, to which it can respond with air strikes. Those air strikes, however, are not “hostilities.”

Today -100: June 21, 1911: Of anonymity and ogres who eat raw babies

The NY state senate passes (27-2) a bill requiring all newspaper editorials to be signed by their authors. The bill’s sponsor had been recently attacked in an editorial for his opposition to women’s suffrage.

Zapata, in Mexico City to talk to Madero about the various allegations against him, says, “we are not ogres who ate raw babies.” Um... good?

Today -100: June 20, 1911: Of chiefs of arms, pharmaceutical assistants, and republics

Madero has appointed Zapata “chief of arms” of the state of Morelos, and the state of Morelos is not best pleased, given the whole “bandit” thing and Zapata’s rather rough tactics during the revolution and after.

Kiev orders the expulsion of 1,000 Jewish families, because they are not pharmaceutical assistants.

The US finally recognizes the Portuguese republic.

Today -100: June 19, 1911: Of sulky dictators and wrathful sultans

Porifirio Díaz says, “I have broken all the bonds which hold me to Mexico, and even if I were asked I would not return to take part in the politics of the country.”

In other news, no one is asking Porfirio Díaz to return to take part in the politics of the country.

Headline of the Day -100: “Fled From Sultan’s Wrath.” The vanished former dentist of the sultan of the Ottoman Empire, one Frank Faber, has been found. What happened was this: Dr. Faber was attempting to extract a molar from the sultan, but used too little cocaine. The sultan yelled, as one does, and Faber promptly decamped to Berlin, and just kept running. His wife, who he left behind in his haste, has finally tracked him down in Chicago.

Today -100: June 18, 1911: Of bribery, eyeglass wars, ingratitude, yeggmen, and a highly diverting bill of sprightly vaudeville

Cleveland police charge and club striking garment workers who were threatening scabs.

The Senate is once again investigating the election-by-bribery of William Lorimer. This time they plan to do a less cursory job and will interview the entire Illinois Legislature.

Headline of the Day -100: “EYEGLASS WAR RENEWED. Optometrists Suspect Oculists of a Secret Attack and Plan to Resist.” You wouldn’t hit a guy with glasses, would you?

In exile, Porfirio Díaz issues a statement about the Revolution, accusing the Mexican people of “ingratitude” and claiming that he abdicated to deprive the US of an excuse to intervene. He denies having been a military dictator, saying (I paraphrase), Did you see how crap the military’s performance was? In fact, he says, it was his recent liberalization that created the Revolution because it was seen by his enemies as a sign of weakness. So the lesson he draws is that he should have been an even bigger shit.

The mayor of Cass Lake, Minnesota, a doctor, is arrested for being the “head and plotting genius” of a band of yeggmen, following a shoot-out between two yeggs on one side, and police and Pinkerton men on the other. Dr. Dumas blames the charges on politics.

And opening today -100, a highly diverting bill of sprightly vaudeville:



Also of interest: wordorigins.org offers a list of words coined in 1911 (h/t Fritinancy), including brassiere, air force, floozy and hophead.

Things I can’t be arsed to blog about

The sexism of Obama’s Father’s Day proclamation.

Weiners, cottage cheese, traumatic head injuries, and boobies

From various British news sources:

New Statesman: I haven’t read this, because I don’t really think at this stage in my life I need “Weinergate Explained,” but I just have to wonder if the NS couldn’t have found someone to write it who wasn’t named Cockburn.

Daily Telegraphy: Headline of the Day: “Israelis Call for Facebook Boycott of Cottage Cheese.”

The Telegraph reports on an important article in Acta Neurochirurgica, the official journal of the European Association of Neurological Studies, in which some big-time neurologists (I’m assuming) read through their old Asterix comic books and found the depictions of no fewer than 704 traumatic head injuries.

Independent: Scientific Headline of the Day: “Booby That Inspired Darwin Caught in an Evolutionary Trap.” Would you like to see a picture of a booby? ... Hello, new Google search readers:

Today -100: June 17, 1911: Of rats

Headline of the Day -400... no, wait, it’s evidently still -100: “Rat Plague in London.”

Today -100: June 16, 1911: Of money monopolies and firing squads

NJ Gov. Woodrow Wilson inveighs against the over-concentration of banking, which he calls the “money monopoly.” Such a monopoly must necessarily “chill and check and destroy genuine economic freedom.”

During the fighting in Mexico, the rebels executed a Col. Morelos. But there was some delay because they’d never run a firing squad before, so Morelos had to give them step-by-step instructions. It’s lucky he was there.

Hostilities

In response to congressional demands for a report on why the war in Libya doesn’t violate the War Powers Act, the Obama admin released a report (pdf) today saying the war in Libya doesn’t violate the War Powers Act. So that settles that.

In fact, the War Powers Act doesn’t even apply to this little contretemps. “Given the important U.S. interests served by U.S. military operations in Libya...” Oh, this war is for important interests, why didn’t you say so. “...and the limited nature, scope and duration of the anticipated actions...” Oh, is that what you anticipated. Incidentally, the limited duration of the anticipated actions was just extended by NATO through September. “...the President had constitutional authority, as Commander in Chief and Chief Executive and pursuant to his foreign affairs powers...” What foreign affairs powers are those? To appoint ambassadors, subject to Senate confirmation, to negotiate treaties, ditto, and that’s it. And as to his constitutional authority as Commander in Chief and Chief Executive and Chief Chief Chief, where in the Constitution does it say he gets to bomb any country he wants? “...to direct such limited military operations abroad. The President is of the view that the current U.S. military operations in Libya are consistent with the War Powers Resolution and do not under that law require further congressional authorization...” Further? When has there been any? “...because U.S. military operations are distinct from the kind of ‘hostilities’ contemplated by the Resolution’s 60 day termination provision.” Actually, the War Powers Act applies to “any case in which U.S. Armed Forces are introduced into hostilities.”

“U.S. forces are playing a constrained and supporting role in a multinational coalition, whose operations are both legitimated by and limited to the terms of a United Nations Security Council Resolution that authorizes the use of force solely to protect civilians and civilian populated areas under attack or threat of attack and to enforce a no-fly zone and an arms embargo. U.S. operations do not involve sustained fighting or active exchanges of fire with hostile forces, nor do they involve the presence of U.S. ground troops, U.S. casualties or a serious threat thereof, or any significant chance of escalation into a conflict characterized by those factors.” So it’s Vietnam 1962, not Vietnam 1966.

The argument isn’t just that it’s such a small war that it’s not worth bothering Congress’s pretty head about – compared to the currency our many “real” wars, it’s the take-a-penny-leave-a-penny bowl – but that it’s not real “hostilities” if Americans aren’t dying, only Libyans are, because wogs don’t count.

An exciting time for African democracy

Italians voted this week on several national referenda on Silvio Berlusconi’s policies, put on the ballot by his opponents. Berlusconi’s policy towards the election, therefore, was to tell his supporters not to vote, since referenda fail if they don’t get a 50% turnout (before this week, none had for 16 years), and use his dominance of the state and private media to stifle discussion of the election. But there was a high turnout, and c.94% votes to overturn his plans to build new nuclear plants, privatize water, and give immunity to government officials such as himself who are just too busy to be bothered by corruption trials.

---

A couple of days ago, Hillary Clinton gave a speech to the African Union in Addis Ababa.

SAY, HILLARY, WHAT TIME IS IT? “Let me begin by saying this is an exciting time for African democracy.”


Indeed, “we do know that too many people in Africa still live under longstanding rulers, men who care too much about the longevity of their reign, and too little about the legacy that should be built for their country’s future.” She did not say how many people in Africa is the right number to still live under longstanding rulers, men who care too much about the longevity of their reign, and too little about the legacy that should be built for their country’s future, but apparently the current number is too many.

The Arab Spring (er, didn’t that lead to a military coup, several bloody crackdowns, and an ongoing civil/international war?) sent a message: “The status quo is broken; the old ways of governing are no longer acceptable; it is time for leaders to lead with accountability, treat their people with dignity, respect their rights, and deliver economic opportunity.” So evidently in the past, until earlier this year, I guess, the old ways of governing were perfectly acceptable and it was not time for leaders to lead with accountability, treat their people with dignity, respect their rights, and deliver economic opportunity.

The Arab Spring “has particular significance for leaders in Africa and elsewhere who hold on to power at all costs, who suppress dissent, who enrich themselves and their supporters at the expense of their own people. To those leaders our message must be clear: Rise to this historic occasion; show leadership by embracing a true path that honors your people’s aspirations; create a future that your young people will believe in, defend, and help build.” So evidently democracy will come about by leaders who hitherto have held on to power at all costs, suppressed dissent and enriched themselves and their supporters at the expense of their own people, changing their minds and “showing leadership.” Maybe it’s me, but I’m wondering if we haven’t seen quite enough leadership from people who have held on to power at all costs, suppressed dissent and enriched themselves and their supporters at the expense of their own people.

NOT THAT IT’S A CONTEST OR ANYTHING: “The women of Africa are the hardest working women in the world.”


WELL, NOT THE TIDE OF LIBYAN HISTORY: “There is little question that the kind of activities that, unfortunately, have affected the Libyan people for more than 40 years run against the tide of history.” I don’t think the threat of being “against the tide of history” or “on the wrong side of history,” as she says elsewhere in the speech, is one that really has ever had anyone quaking in their boots. All this “history” talk is the 21st century version of saying that Africans are at a more primitive stage of civilization.

HAS HE CHECKED BEHIND THE SOFA CUSHIONS? “But it has become clearer by the day that [Qaddafi] has lost his legitimacy to rule, and we are long past time when he can or should remain in power.” She does not say when he lost his legitimacy to rule or when and how he acquired that legitimacy in the first place. She says that the AU nations should expel Qaddafi’s diplomats and “increase contact and support for the Transitional National Council.” Maybe the council found the legitimacy that Qaddafi so carelessly lost. Or maybe not, since Clinton doesn’t suggest that African nations recognize it as Libya’s one and true government.

Awkward.

WHAT HILLARY HAS NEVER MET: “We welcome to our shores immigrants from every country represented here... But I have never met an immigrant from Africa who has not said he or she wished they could have done the very same in their own country, among their own people, close to their family, eating the food, smelling the flowers, seeing the sights that are in their blood. I want to see that for Africa, where people are coming home to Africa because this is where opportunity for the future resides.” I believe she’s saying that she wants Obama to go back to Kenya and let her be president.

Oh, and “seeing the sights that are in their blood”? Unless she’s talking about something involving Raquel Welch in a miniaturized submarine, that comes across just a bit racist.

And then she left early, because of a volcano in Eritrea. Volcanoes always seem to be chasing Obama officials out of countries lately, don’t they?

Today -100: June 15, 1911: Of Fisk, ammo and cat chicks

At the commencement ceremony at Fisk University, a negro college, a letter from President Taft is read: “I am not one of those who believe that it is well to educate the mass of negroes with academic or university education.” He did know he was writing to a university, didn’t he? And one with negro students at that? “On the contrary, I am firmly convinced that the hope of the negro is in his industrial education throughout the South, and in teaching him to be a better farmer, a better carpenter, a better machinist, and a better blacksmith than he is now; and to make more blacksmiths and more good farmers than there now are among the negroes. But I have studied the matter considerably, and have also become convinced that it is necessary to have a few...” Just a few, mind... “...high-class negro universities for those who are to be the leaders of the race and who are to figure prominently in a professional way – their ministers, their physicians, their lawyers, and their teachers – because we have got to treat the race as distinct from the white.” He goes on to praise the quality of Fisk, which “is proved not only by an examination of its college statistics, but by the testimony of the best white men in the community where it exercises its influence.” Well, if the best white men in the community say so...

Teddy Roosevelt also sent a letter. He also said that more negroes needed industrial training than higher ed but that “a certain proportion of the race” should have the latter, but he somehow managed to say it without being such a condescending prick.

One possible reason the Mexican military performed so poorly against the rebels becomes clear from an inspection of army supplies at Juarez: really crap government-manufactured ammunition, containing so little powder that it couldn’t fire any distance at all. The stuff the rebels had, smuggled in from the US, was much better. Also, the federales had 200 80mm shells but 70mm mortars.

Headline of the Day -100: “Cat Hatches Chickens.” It must be true: a Baptist Sunday-school teacher in New Jersey says so. He will send the cat and her four chicks to President Taft as soon as they are old enough to travel, although what Taft is supposed to do with these miraculous creatures, I have no idea.

Reading further, I see that the cat is named Barney. I begin to distrust this Sunday-school teacher’s understanding of biology.

Today -100: June 14, 1911: Of monarchists & anti-Semites

Portugal is preparing for an expected invasion by monarchists.

Headline of the Day -100: “Anti-Semites Beaten.” Sadly, not literally. In Austrian parliamentary elections.

Republican debate: Don’t be stupid

Whatever else you can say about tonight’s Republican debate, Neil Patrick Harris did a terrific job of hosting.




Asked about Pawlenty’s claim he could get 5% economic growth, Santorum says he won’t comment on “4% or 5%”, showing the proper Republican dismissiveness of “numbers.”

T-Paw: if China, Brazil can have 5% growth, so can we!

Ron Paul: Why not 15%!


T-Paw refuses to apologize for coining “ObamneyCare™.” But he was really embarrassed at being asked to repeat to Romney’s face the stuff he’s been saying about him behind his back.

T-Paw calls Obama a “declinist.”

Gingrich: if government can set rules for health care, it can set rules for everything in your life, like setting a lifetime cap on wives.

Bachmann says she wants to announce here tonight that Obama will be a One. Term. President.


“De-tax”? Is that a word, Ron Paul?

T-Paw is not for being a chump (something about free trade).

Bachmann: the EPA should really be renamed the Job Killing Organization of America (JKOA).


Gingrich: “right-to-work” states are telling the other states, “Don’t be stupid.”

Bachmann says she fought TARP behind closed doors. Possibly the doors of her padded cell.

Who will support the manned space program? T-Paw kind of. Gingrich wants a decentralized space program, and cut out the bureaucracy. Because we built the Trans-Continental Railroad without a National Department of Railroads.


Mittens: we shouldn’t be asking what parts of the federal government to cut, we should be asking what parts to keep. Isn’t that basically the same question?

Cain says something about throwing our grandchildren in wheelchairs off a bridge. Really, unless he’s talking about setting a national no-anchovy-toppings policy, I don’t really care what Herman Cain has to say.

And he wants us to be just like Pinochet’s Chile, or something.

Santorum: you approach decisions using faith and reason, and if your faith is pure and your reason is right, you’ll come to the same place. Although if that place is your dining room and there’s a fetus on the table, there’s a strong possibility something has gone badly wrong with your faith, your reason, or both.


Cain: when I said I wouldn’t appoint Muslims to my cabinet, I meant the ones trying to kill us. By putting anchovies on our pizzas.

Gingrich says he wouldn’t appoint people not willing to be loyal to the United States. “We did this in dealing with the Nazis, and we did this in dealing with the Communists, and it was controversial both times”. Always nice to have a shout-out to Joseph McCarthy, although I don’t know what the hell he’s talking about with the Nazis.

Governor Romney, spicy wings or mild? Spicy (but ask him again tomorrow, and he’ll say mild). Really, John King asked that question.


Who supports a federal Constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage? T-Paw, Mittens, Gingrich, Santorum, Bachmann do, the rest would leave it to the states. Paul says government should be out of the business of giving marriage licenses, it should be up to the church. Atheists, you’re shit out of luck.

Overturn Obama’s repeal Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell? Pawlenty would leave it up to the service chiefs. Paul: rights don’t come in groups, we shouldn’t have gay rights. Romney fails to answer. Gingrich would listen to the commanders, whose lives are at risk. Bachmann: overturn after listening to the chiefs. Santorum: repeal the repeal.

Whenever some random New Hampshirehoovian asks a question on the big screen, Bachmann responds while looking at the screen and not at the camera, not having learned anything from her State of the Union response.


If there’s one thing Bachmann really wants you to take away from this debate, judging by the number of times she’s brought it up, it’s that she’s fostered 23 children.

Should a 5-year-old illegal immigrant be turned away from a hospital emergency room? Ron Paul says something about no mandates on hospitals, which I take to mean yes. But the Catholic Church should be allowed to take care of him.

T-Paw, Coke or Pepsi? Coke.

Romney: every one of these candidates would be a better president than Obama. Obama doesn’t have a foreign policy.


No one willing to say which of the other candidates they’d choose as their running mate. Ron Paul doesn’t even know what their views on the Federal Reserve are.

Gingrich: “we don’t have even today the intelligence to know what we’re doing.” Okay, he’s talking about Libya here, but it does seem to sum things up nicely.