Today -100: December 19, 1914: Of sultans, lynchings and the usual verdict, spoils, and grungy Wobblies and Seattle coffee shops

The British have appointed Prince Hussein Kemal the Sultan of Egypt.  That sounds weird: sultan... appointed.  One might be forgiven for thinking the real power is the British (Acting) High Commissioner, the appropriately named Milne Cheetham.  Britain promises that after the war Egyptians will be allowed to participate in their own governance “in such measure as the degree of enlightenment of public opinion may permit.”  Which was more or less the Obama policy when it backed Sisi’s coup.  France, which since the 1880s has been hostile to such a move by the British, agrees to it now, while Britain confirms its rights to Morocco.

A negro, Will Jones, is lynched in Alabama, near Port Deposit, for supposedly trying to assault a (unstated but presumably) white girl.  The LAT headline says “Coroner Returns Usual Verdict,” which is death “at the hands of unknown parties.”

Pres. Wilson and Senate Democrats are in a fight over the appointments system.  A couple of days ago, the Senate unanimously rejected his choice for federal district attorney in New York because he was opposed by Sen. O’Gorman.  The Senate is fighting for the “principle” that appointments must be supported by the Democratic senator(s) from that state.  Wilson is fighting back with a whole bunch of appointments opposed by Democratic senators.  He’s also been using recess appointments.  The Senate is fighting back, rejecting an appointment for postmaster of Kansas City.

Mayor Hiram Gill of Seattle orders police to rid the city of Wobblies following mob attacks on a coffee house and a market.  Gills says, “as long as I am mayor of this city, it can be understood that Seattle is through fooling with a lot of anarchists, thugs, firebugs and worse who masquerade as the unemployed and fall in a faint when a bath or an hour’s work is mentioned.  And I don’t want any of the ruling Miss Nancy Goody-Goody outfit coming down here to tell me to be kind to my brother man.  In the first place the I.W.W.’s are not my brothers, and in the second place I’m through monkeying with them.”

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Today -100: December 18, 1914: Of protectorates, imperial swearing, cows, and lions

Britain declares Egypt a protectorate, ending the very nominal suzerainty of the Ottoman Empire.

Votes for Women (London) complains that the number of places from which women are excluded under wartime regulations is growing daily, including public houses during certain hours, the streets of Cardiff (but only for “certain women”), and St. Paul’s Cathedral after 9 p.m.

Germany and France are exchanging interned civilians.

After being told of the losses in Serbia, Austrian Emperor Franz Josef is said to have “swore like a trooper.”

In a lawsuit case of breach of promise of marriage in which the man broke off his engagement when the woman, after consulting a physician and a fortune-teller, told him that she probably wouldn’t have children, NY Supreme Court Justice Benton told the jury that eugenics demands they rule against her, because “Civilization itself demands not only that children be born, but that they may be born to a proper heritage mentally and physically.”  The jury agreed.

Herbert Hoover asks for donations of canned milk to Belgium, all of the country’s cows having been seized by the Germans.

The British military censors plan to close their office for a day and a half for Christmas, so there will be no war news whatsoever.

The official British report on yesterday’s German bombardment of coastal towns says that 108 people were killed.  Hartlepool’s gas works were destroyed.

Headline of the Day -100:  “Five Lions Loose in Theatre Throng.”  They escape after performing their “man-eating lion” act at the Eighty-Sixth Street Theatre, while the quartet was playing, because of course you follow lions with a quartet (barbershop quartet, I think).  One, named Alice, Alice the lion, was cornered by police on the fourth floor of a tenement and shot dead.  The others never left the theater – it’s cold outside in New York in December – and were herded back into their cage.

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Cutting loose the shackles of the past

Obama spoke today about Cuba policy.

OUTDATED: “we will end an outdated approach that, for decades, has failed to advance our interests”. What date was it when this approach actually did work? Outdated seems to be the word Obama uses when he wants to change a policy without admitting it was stupid.

“year after year, an ideological and economic barrier hardened between our two countries”. Funny how that happened all about itself.

“this policy has been rooted in the best of intentions”. Killing Castro, subjugating the Cuban people to the will of American politicians and corporations, you know, the best of intentions.

“no other nation joins us in imposing these sanctions, and it has had little effect beyond providing the Cuban government with a rationale for restrictions on its people.” Oh, and worsening the living conditions of millions of Cubans for decades, you know, “little effect.”

“While I have been prepared to take additional steps for some time, a major obstacle stood in our way –- the wrongful imprisonment, in Cuba, of a U.S. citizen and USAID sub-contractor Alan Gross for five years.” Because one white American guy is more important than... oh, that’s just too silly. Along with the “wrongful imprisonment” thing and the “USAID sub-contractor” thing.

Then he pretended that Gross was released “on humanitarian grounds,” because Gross was important enough to keep the US’s Cuba policy in limbo for 6 years, but not important enough that we’ll admit to having bargained with Cuba for his release. Our release of 3 Cubans was, purely coincidentally, in exchange for a super-secret US super-spy no one’s ever heard of (and still haven’t, since no name of this alleged super-spy has been released). “This man, whose sacrifice has been known to only a few...” Or, you know, none. “Having recovered these two men who sacrificed for our country...” Wait, I thought you said Gross wasn’t a spy?

“Going forward, the United States will reestablish an embassy in Havana, and high-ranking officials will visit Cuba.” Except Congress will never fund an embassy, much less confirm an ambassador.

“But I believe that we can do more to support the Cuban people and promote our values through engagement.” How about not trying to promote “our values” (a phrase he uses three times) at all? Maybe Cuba’s seen enough of our values over the last 116 years and maybe Cubans don’t need to be taught values by us.

“After all, these 50 years have shown that isolation has not worked. It’s time for a new approach.” Or 5 years, really. Also, it’s not really isolation if we’re the only country not interacting with Cuba. But look at that word “worked.” He’s not saying that the goal of changing Cuba’s government for it is wrong, just that we need to find a “new approach” to accomplishing it.

“I’ve instructed Secretary Kerry to review Cuba’s designation as a State Sponsor of Terrorism.” Not that such designations aren’t entirely objective, of course.

“With the changes I’m announcing today, it will be easier for Americans to travel to Cuba, and Americans will be able to use American credit and debit cards on the island. Nobody represents America’s values better than the American people”. Except for MasterCard.

US companies will be allowed to sell them the Internet now. Everyone send any extra cat videos you have lying around to Cuba.

Talking about the Summit of the Americas: “Let us leave behind the legacy of both colonization and communism, the tyranny of drug cartels, dictators and sham elections.” You’ll notice he doesn’t mention anything bad the US has done except direct colonization (unless by sham elections he meant Bush in 2000).

“Countless thousands of Cubans have come to Miami -- on planes and makeshift rafts; some with little but the shirt on their back and hope in their hearts.” And with hope on their back and a shirt in their hearts, but they never lived very long.

“Today, America chooses to cut loose the shackles of the past so as to reach for a better future”. And I’m sure the Cuban people will be profoundly grateful that you’re cutting those shackles that we put on them in the first place.

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Today -100: December 17, 1914: We fully expect the German ships to come again, until they come once too often

German ships fire on the English seaside town of Whitby. Some houses are hit and one man killed. Dracula was uninjured. Hartlepool and Scarborough are similarly bombarded, with more deaths. The London Times notes that attacks on unfortified towns are illegal under international law, but Germany has “jettisoned alike all the principles of international law and all the dictates of society.” Further, “The raid had no genuine military or naval significance, and its objects could only be to relieve the prevalent depression in Germany and create panics in these islands. The second object has entirely failed. The raid was received with complete calmness. We fully expect the German ships to come again, until they come once too often.”

The LAT reports that Albania – or at least tribes in northern Albania, since it’s not like Albania has a real central government – declare war on Serbia.

Serbia’s King Peter triumphantly returns to Belgrade.

Gen. Tasker Bliss threatens the Mexican sides fighting each other across the border from Naco, Arizona that he will use “extreme measures” if any more bullets cross the border. (Tomorrow he will deny that he issued the ultimatum.)

The US Senate is debating the literacy requirement clause in the proposed immigration bill, and specifically discussing how to exempt Jews fleeing persecution from it. One suggestion is to exempt anyone fleeing from a country whose laws explicitly discriminate against their religion.

Well? Will there?

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In case you did not know this already, Americans kind of suck

Separate Pew and CBS polls released yesterday showed that a majority of Americans interviewed believe waterboarding and “aggressive interrogation tactics” (the term used by the CBS poll) are justified. The CBS poll also tells us that 69% believe that waterboarding is a form of torture. Unfortunately, through some combination of poor questionnaire design (waterboarding and “aggressive interrogation” should not have been lumped together like that) and poor reporting of the polls, we don’t know how many people both 1) believe waterboarding is torture, and 2) believe it is justified. Even Dick Cheney won’t say in so many words that he believes torture – a word he barely admits exists in the English language – is justified, but many ordinary Americans... did I mention that we kind of suck?

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Today -100: December 16, 1914: On all sound and sensible lines

Turkey returns the British consul they removed from the Italian consulate in Yemen and apologized (to Italy).

Henry Stimson, who was Taft’s secretary of war and would hold the job again during World War II, says the US is militarily “a great, helpless, unprepared nation.” He wants more ammunition and a bigger navy.

Pres. Wilson writes to the University Commission on Southern Race Questions that “I know myself as a Southern man how sincerely the heart of the South desires the good of the negro and the advancement of his race on all sound and sensible lines... It is a matter of common understanding.”

Michigan Gov. Ferris paroles a prisoner sentenced to life in 1904 for stealing a couple of hams.

Pancho Villa’s men are said to have executed 100 to 150 people in Mexico City.

Pancho Villa drinks alcohol for the first time in his life, with Zapata. Mescal, which the NYT informs its gringo readers is not a beginner’s drink.

Turkey orders every Palestinian to support the war effort by supplying one sack and one tin can.

Women car salesmen. Whatever was the world coming to?

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Today -100: December 15, 1914: Let our hearts beat to God, our fists beat the enemy

Serbia takes Belgrade back from the Austrians, who now hold only a tiny amount of Serbian territory.

Headline of the Day -100: “Ducks Used as Decoys Trap 17,000 Serbs.” Serb spies in Mitrovica manipulated the number of ducks on the River Save (I’m not sure how) to signal the numbers and movements of Austrian troops, until the Austrians figured out the system and used it against them.

A Berlin newspaper asks people how Germans at home should keep Christmas this year. Berlin Police Chief von Jagow: “Let our hearts beat to God, our fists beat the enemy.” Ho ho ho.

The French army asks the families of soldiers not to send so many Christmas packages to the front.

The provincial council of Iceland (still a colony of Denmark) has resigned after refusing to agree to a new constitution which would give the Danish State Council the right to discuss Icelandic affairs.

The US again demands that Mexicans stop shooting at each other where the bullets might cross the border. Naco, Arizona has been getting a little bit shot up lately. Both sides say it’s the other side whose bullets are going astray.

Some humorist put up a sign in a cemetery in Croatia: “Fifth levy of conscripts. Arise ye dead! The Emperor Franz Josef has need of you!”

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Today -100: December 14, 1914: Of stamps, raids, and tabernacles

The French Post Office announces that stamps to certain parts of Alsace will now cost only ten centimes. In other words, France has re-annexed part of the Lost Provinces. Or the post office has.

There are reports that Turkey is hanging some Armenians in the streets.

Fog of War (Rumors, Propaganda and Just Plain Bullshit) of the Day -100: Supposedly, Turkish naval crews have mutinied against their German officers, who were behaving like, well, German officers.

The Turks stormed the Italian consulate in Hodeidha (in Yemen, then part of the Ottoman Empire) to grab British Consul G.A. Richardson. The Italians are not best pleased and neither, I assume, is Mr. Richardson.

Collier’s Weekly sends an investigator to Atlanta to look into the Leo Frank case. He reports what everyone else has: Frank is innocent, unfair trial, etc.

Frank Cannon, the first US senator from Utah in the 1890s and now an anti-Mormon activist, comes to New York City to warn against Mormon plans to build a tabernacle in the city and send in 2,500 missionaries. Now that they can’t proselytize in Europe, out-of-work missionaries figure New York City is the next best thing.

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Today -100: December 13, 1914: Of conciliation, coups, Germans in boxes, lynchings, and suffrage movies

Pres. Wilson’s Colorado Conciliation Commission sees no reason to travel to, you know, Colorado.

Carranza declares that he now holds all executive, judicial, legislative and military powers.

Deposed Mexican dictator Victoriano Huerta, now in exile in Spain, writes the NYT to deny that he is supporting Pancho Villa. “I can never have dealings with Carranza, the four-flusher; Zapata, the highwayman, nor with Villa, the jailbird.”

Headline of the Day -100: “Find German Officer Hidden In a Big Box.” A German spy (?) escapes from internment in Britain and puts himself on a steam ferry to Rotterdam. In a big box. Labeled “non-poisonous safety matches.”

The number of lynchings in the US may be on the decline, but not as much, I think, as reporting of lynchings in the NYT. The AP reports an epidemic in Caddo Parish (Shreveport, Louisiana), 8 in the last year, 5 in the last 10 days. Of the 8, 7 were charged with murdering white men, one with raping a white woman. The latest, Charles Watkins Lewis, was burned at the stake.

Women in London have switched from knitting warm clothing for the troops to something much more practical: rolling cigarettes for them.

The Sunday NYT book review section takes note of a quickie biography of Kaiser Wilhelm II by Asa Don Dickinson (author of “Wild Flowers Worth Knowing”) which declares the monarch “not a bad fellow.”

And the arts section takes note of what it calls the first women’s suffrage propaganda movie, “Your Girl and Mine: A Woman Suffrage Play.” It tells the story of a woman who faces various forms of legal discrimination in states without women’s suffrage before moving to a more enlightened state. Looks like the film hasn’t survived.

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Today -100: December 12, 1914: Which phrase sounds dirtier: large collection of Whistlers, or queer hysterical hip?

Russia rejects the pope’s proposal for a Christmas truce.

Richard Canfield, the “Prince of Gamblers,” dies at 59, after a fall on the subway steps. Canfield, whose ancestors came over on the Mayflower, owned and ran a series of increasingly upscale gambling parlors, culminating in a luxurious one next to Delmonico’s Restaurant, until the authorities cracked down a few years ago. He was an art collector and a friend of the painter James McNeil Whistler, whose portrait of him (entitled “His Reverence”) is below. He recently sold his large collection of Whistlers for $300,000.

And this is Everett Shinn’s 1912 “The Canfield Gambling House.”

The general manager and another employee of the Dominion Chain Company are arrested by the Canadian military on secret charges, which seem to be that the latter sang a German song at a banquet.

Britain says that the sinking of those German ships at the Falklands assures the peace of the Pacific Ocean.

Headline of the Day -100 (LA Times): “Woman’s Queer Hysterical Hip.” The hip in question belongs to a Mrs. Elizabeth F. Murphy Roos, now suing the Central Fireproof Building Company, in whose elevator she supposedly fell. A doctor testifying for the building says Roos, a serial lawsuit-bringer, is faking disability by dislocating her own hip. She agrees to be examined while unconscious under sedation, and is, but there is still disagreement among the doctors. She is awarded $1,500.

Queer hysterical hip would be a great name for a band.

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Today -100: December 11, 1914: Of truces, unkind press, copper, and polygamists

Germany agrees to the pope’s request for a Christmas peace – provided every other nation also agrees.

Joseph Smith III, son of the founder of the Mormons and himself the Prophet-President since 1860 of the non-Brigham-Young, non-Utah, non-polygamist faction of the church, dies at 82.  He will be succeeded by his son Frederick.

Headline of the Day -100:  “French Press Unkind to the Kaiser.”

Though the Colorado coal miners have ended their strike, mineowners are refusing to hire them back.  So Gov. Ammons is begging Wilson to keep federal troops in Colorado, since the miners might be a touch miffed.

The Germans are stripping Belgium of copper.  There are people in my town like that.

Hoboken police are looking for a man who calls himself Karl von Wagner (also Paul Steiner, Otto Burger, Carl Schallenberg, etc) who has been marrying and abandoning German-American women and stealing their money.  Over 50 of them.  That’s polygamy practiced with German efficiency.

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Sitemeter

If anyone cares, I’ve removed the Sitemeter code from this site. I’d assumed that if it was causing problems with the blog for anyone, you’d have complained, but then one of my posts last month had a title referring to “North Korans” for nearly a week, which is the sort of thing you people used to pounce on like hungry jackals. Still, I’m seeing more and more reports about Sitemeter turning evil, so it was time to shitcan it.

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Today -100: December 10, 1914: Of fires, poles, and falklands

Thomas Edison’s factory and labs burn down. The fire started with an explosion in the film finishing building.  Edison blames the West Orange Water Company for lacking sufficient water pressure.  His workers (and wife) rescue what they can, including patent documents.

Rep. C. B. Smith (D-NY), former chairman of the House foreign affairs committee, wants to annex the North Pole.

The American Red Cross decides to limit its work in Europe to caring for sick and wounded soldiers.  Suck it, civilians.

An Allied airplane (whose country of origin is for some reason not mentioned) bombs a German pontoon bridge in Belgium, then mocks the German soldiers shooting at it by flying loop-the-loops.

The British Navy sinks four German cruisers and damages two others trying to raid a coaling station on the Falkland Islands. These were most of the few German ships which were on the high seas at the start of the war.  2,200 sailors German die, including Admiral Maximilian von Spee and two of his sons, both lieutenants.  Admiral “Blinker” Hall, head of British Naval Intelligence, later claimed to have sent Spee a fake order by wireless, using broken/salvaged German naval codes, to mount the raid, which is probably not true, though the codes were used three months later to locate and sink the Dresden, a light cruiser which escaped the Battle of the Falklands.

The British do enjoy sinking shit off the Falklands.

Leo Frank is sentenced to be hanged on January 22.

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Today -100: December 9, 1914: A war with which we have nothing to do

In his State of the Union Address, Woodrow Wilson is defensive about the condition of the US’s military defenses (he’s been fighting off attempts in Congress to investigate that).  “It is said in some quarters that we are not prepared for war. What is meant by being prepared? Is it meant that we are not ready upon brief notice to put a nation in the field, a nation of men trained to arms? Of course we are not ready to do that; and we shall never be in time of peace so long as we retain our present political principles and institutions. ... We are at peace with all the world. ... We are, indeed, a true friend to all the nations of the world, because we threaten none, covet the possessions of none, desire the overthrow of none.”  Indeed, he says, increasing military spending more than the tiny amount it has been increased, creating a standing army “would mean merely that we had lost our self-possession, that we had been thrown off our balance by a war with which we have nothing to do, whose causes can not touch us, whose very existence affords us opportunities of friendship and disinterested service which should make us ashamed of any thought of hostility or fearful preparation for trouble.”

He’s less concerned about the military than by the deficiency of commercial ships, because he’s positively licking his lips at the thought of American companies taking over the trade with Latin America and elsewhere that European companies can’t currently handle.  He wants the government to step in and buy ships, which he compares to the government subsidy of the Transcontinental Railroad.

He also promises businesses that he’s done with adding new regulations on them: “Our program of legislation with regard to the regulation of business is now virtually complete. It has been put forth, as we intended, as a whole, and leaves no conjecture as to what is to follow. The road at last lies clear and firm before business. It is a road which it can travel without fear or embarrassment. It is the road to ungrudged, unclouded success. In it every honest man, every man who believes that the public interest is part of his own interest, may walk with perfect confidence.”

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The United Mine Workers end the strike in Colorado after 14 months.  Quitters.

Pres. Wilson orders an inquiry into whether James Sullivan, his ambassador to the Dominican Republic, used his influence to get Dominican government contracts for his family and friends.

Headline of the Day -100:  “Osborne Sets Up Convict Republic.”  Sing Sing Warden Thomas Mott Osborne will allow an inmate “court” to deal with infractions (on the theory that it is unrealistic to ask prisoners to fink to the guards).

Fog Smoke of War (Rumors, Propaganda and Just Plain Bullshit) of the Day -100: The Daily Mail (London) accused the Germans of burning down the French village of Domremy, the birthplace of Joan of Arc, showing their disregard for sacred blah blah blah.  Actually, it was a different Domremy.

Albert A. Michelson, the first American to win a Nobel Prize in the sciences, in 1907, says he’s invented a new type of super-strong steel, which will make possible taller skyscrapers and indestructible forts, which would end all wars.  Super Steel™ is not mentioned in Michelson’s Wikipedia page.

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In other words, he was a comforter

George Bush was interviewed by Candy Crowley on CNN about his book on his father. Hey, did you know his father was ALSO president? What’re the odds?

IN OTHER WORDS: “Well, I think I’m introducing him to our country in a way no one’s ever known him. In other words, he’s an extraordinary person, not only because of his accomplishments but because of his character.”

PLEASE, YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW A PRETZEL WORKS: “And secondly I understand how history works; it takes a long time for people to get to know him, get to know somebody and then analyze their decisions. But I wanted to be one of the first people out in the evaluation of George H.W. Bush.” Most of the rest of us actually evaluated him when he was president, but George was pretty drunk those entire four years.

MEANS NEVER HAVING TO SAY YOU’RE SORRY. “And it’s a love story. I mean, there’s - I love him.”

IN OTHER WORDS: He denies having daddy issues: “Yeah, stiff competition is overstated. In other words if you love somebody as much as I love my dad, and my brothers loved my dad, my sister, there’s no need to compete.”

He says he didn’t discuss presidential stuff with his father: “And I think part of it has to do with how he raised us, and that is I love you no matter what you do.” Or he just gave up on you ever getting anything right a long time ago.

IN OTHER WORDS: “But I hope when people read this, and I hope they do, is that they understand that when he reached across and grabbed my arm after the speech on September the 14 in the National Cathedral, I mean, incredibly emotional moment for me, it was in many ways symbolic of what he’d meant for me as president. In other words, he was a comforter. A lot.” No, he just seemed like a comforter because he was feather-brained.

DOESN’T KNOW A LOT OF ADJECTIVES, DOES HE? “and so he was confident I had a good team and that I would make decisions based upon good judgments of a lot of good advisers.”

IN OTHER WORDS: Still won’t admit being wrong about Putin’s soul. “Well, I think he’s become more zero-sum type thinker. In other words... it’s almost as if he says that if the - if the West wins, I lose. And if I win, the West loses. As opposed to what can we do together to enhance our respective positions?”

He explains how to defeat ISIS: “Well, first thing is there has to be a goal, and the president has laid out what I think is a good goal, and that is to degrade and defeat ISIS.” Why, that’s so crazy it might just work!

IN OTHER WORDS: On Jeb: “So when you’re weighing the presidency, you think, ‘Do I fear success?’ In other words, can I handle it if I win?” But he has “no clue where his head is now” and hasn’t talked with Jeb about 2016. Jeb hasn’t called to ask for advice, George hasn’t called to ask if he’s running. Tell us again all about how close your family is, George.

He also has “no clue” about whether Hillary will run for president in the conservatory with a candle stick.

Similarly, “The [Eric Garner grand jury] verdict was hard to understand”. Also, door knobs.

“But it’s sad that race continues to play such a, you know, kind of emotional, divisive part of life. I remember back in when I was a kid, in the ‘70s...” George was born in 1946. “...and there was race riots with cities being burned. And I just think we’ve improved. I had dinner with Condi the other night and we talked about this subject, and, yes, she just said you got understand that there are a lot of, you know, black folks around that are just incredibly more and more distrusting of law enforcement.” And then I forgot she wasn’t the maid and told her to clear the plates.

The Eric Garner video is “very disturbing to me. And, yes. I mean it just - it calls into question what needs to be done to heal...” Er, nothing, he’s dead. The cop choked him to death.

“...to get the country united again.” And there you go: the poster boy for unearned white privilege thinks there was a golden age of race relations, if we could only figure out how to return to it.

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Today -100: December 8, 1914: Of iron crosses, neutrality, and truces

Now that the unwritten ban on Jews in the German military has been lifted, several have been promoted to be officers and 710 have received the Iron Cross, to which some have responded, “Dude, we’re Jews and you’re giving us a cross?”  (I believe the German for “dude” is “mein duden”).

The US Supreme Court denies Leo Frank’s writ of error.

Charles M. Schwab of Bethlehem Steel and Shipbuilding has given in to Pres. Wilson’s request that he not make submarines for Britain, which Wilson seems to think would violate his neutrality policy.  Evidently the government had no legal way to stop Schwab had he ignored it.

Germany claims to have captured Lodz.

The pope wants a truce in the Great War over Christmas.

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Today -100: December 7, 1914: Of horses, mules, olympics, and Jewish bravery

One of Mexico’s competing presidents, Eulalio Gutiérrez, moves into the presidential palace in Mexico City.  He doesn’t make a speech, but does send someone out to say that his soldiers have not come to steal horses and automobiles, but to work for the welfare of the nation.  It’s probably not a great sign if you have to say that, but he is backed by bandits Villa and Zapata, so the horse-thief/president line might be a little bit blurrier than elsewhere.

Britain is buying pretty much all of Georgia’s mules.

The European war may put a crimp in the 1916 Olympics.  The 1916 Berlin Olympics.

Bankers and stock brokers in Chicago want to change their time zone from Central to Eastern, because it would be convenient for them to sync up with the NY Stock Exchange, but the railroads disagree.  There will be discussions.

The German governor of occupied Antwerp bans the distribution of any pictures of Belgian ruins.

Headline of the Day -100:  “The Jew’s Bravery Established in War.”

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Today -100: December 6, 1914: It still has that new revolution smell

Headline of, Oh, Pretty Much Once a Week -100:  “New Revolution Begins in Mexico.”  Led by a couple of Huerta’s generals, Emilio Campo and José Inés Salazar.  Salazar escaped a couple of weeks ago from jail in Albuquerque, where he was held on a perjury charge, which I think must relate to his acquittal by a federal jury in May on a charge of smuggling 100,000 rounds of ammunition into Mexico.  After this current revolutionary movement fails, Salazar will once again flee into the US, and a year from now will be acquitted again.  Somehow he’ll wind up joining Pancho Villa’s forces, even though he had been in charge of fighting Villa under Huerta.  He’ll be killed in battle in 1917.

The departure of the Lusitania from New York harbor is delayed while the new “war tax” on tickets is collected from passengers.  This amounts to $3 for steerage passengers on their $37.50 ticket.

According to official reports, “Nothing of importance happened in the Carpathians yesterday.”

Vice President Marshall says no one cares that he’s taking paid lecturing gigs.

Belgium is reported, falsely I assume, to have hidden some of its art treasures, including a Rubens, from the Germans at the bottom of the River Scheldt.

Theodore Roosevelt has an op-ed in the NYT entitled “Our Responsibility in Mexico” (this link is more readable than the NYT’s; it’s his 1916 book Fear God and Take Your Own Part [!]; today’s article starts on p.230 at the words “THE SOUND OF LAUGHTER AND OF PLAYING  CHILDREN HAS BEEN STILLED IN MEXICO.”)  TR accuses Wilson of doing both too much in Mexico (refusing to recognize Huerta’s coup regime in the first place, then landing troops at Vera Cruz) and too little (not... actually I’m not sure what he thinks Wilson should have done, but he accuses him of having “hit soft” and withdrawn before accomplishing anything).  I believe this type of criticism is called the Full John McCain.  He says that Wilson’s putting the American finger on the scale in favor of Carranza/Villa has “produce[d] much evil and no good and [made] us responsible for the actions of a peculiarly lawless, ignorant and blood-thirsty faction” and cites the many acts of violence and the harassment of the Catholic Church.

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Today -100: December 5, 1914: Of censorship, and crimes negroes are prone to commit

The British authorities finally allow the press to report the sinking of the Audacious, although not the name of the ship or the location.

The German authorities suppress an issue of the Vossische Zeitung for reporting on a super-secret meeting of a committee of the Reichstag at which, they say, Chancellor Theobald von Bethmann-Hollweg said the war would go longer than expected and the German people had better tighten their belts.  The government denies he said anything of the sort.

And the Budapest authorities are trying to suppress newspapers that reported that Hungarian Prime Minister Count Tisza got a poor reception in Berlin when he tried to get troops sent to protect Hungary’s border.  Kaiser Wilhelm is reported to have been particularly upset about the “egotism of some people” whose desire not to be invaded by Russia would upset Germany’s meticulous war plans.  The Hungarian secret police are literally ripping newspapers out of the hands of people in cafés.  Everyone in Austria-Hungary is coming to realize that all decisions are now being made in Berlin.  Hungary especially was never thrilled with this war.  It disliked Archduke Franz Ferdinand and doesn’t share the Austrian interest in territorial expansion, which would just bring in more troublesome Slavs.

Fog of War (Rumors, Propaganda and Just Plain Bullshit) of the Day -100: Germany claims to have discovered in a town in Belgium super-secret pre-war papers from the British army detailing Belgian military information, showing that Belgium was never neutral, so it was totally okay for Germany to violate its neutrality.

Fog? The London Morning Post says that two of Kaiser Wilhelm’s sons had to flee the Russian army in Poland by airplane.

France, which doesn’t seem to be pressing its advantage while Germany is distracted by losses on its eastern front in Poland, is also fighting a colonial war in Morocco, where a lot of officers have been beheaded by Arab insurgents.

Massachusetts Gov. David Walsh wants to suspend labor laws, including those regulating child labor, overtime, and the 54-hour week, so that the state can take advantage of all the extra orders coming in due to the European war.  It’s called opportunity, people!

The journal American Medicine, which is published in New York, has an article by a psychologist trying – and failing – to figure out why Atlanta is so eager to execute Leo Frank for a crime Jim Conley, who testified against him, obviously did, despite the fact that “The crime [presumably rape rather than murder] is one which negroes are prone to commit, and if a white man is guilty he generally, if not always, shows signs of mental disturbance.”  It’s just science.

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Today -100: December 4, 1914: Of the just aspirations of Italy, naval mishaps, moral surveillance, shell shock, and hangings

Italian Prime Minister Antonio Salandra tells Parliament that just because Italy is neutral in the war doesn’t mean it won’t try to scavenge the bones of the Austro-Hungarian Empire and annex Trento and Trieste (“the just aspirations of Italy,” he calls this goal).

British newspapers are again complaining about censorship, specifically the continued refusal to let the public be informed of “a certain naval mishap” (i.e., the sinking of the Audacious on October 27) of which the German public is fully informed.

After a campaign by suffrage and other feminist groups in Britain against a government circular to local police forces asking them to enquire into the moral worthiness of soldiers’ wives, the government backs down only slightly, and police will continue to consider it their business whether those wives are drinking or screwing around.

Headline of the Day -100:  “Shell Fire Wrecks Reason.”  They don’t have the phrase “shell shock” yet, but will soon.

Pennsylvania holds its last hanging (they’re switching to electrocution).

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Core principle

Another week, another Obama statement about a dead black man killed by a cop who gets away with it.

He has a strong finisher – “When anybody in this country is not being treated equally under the law, that’s a problem. And it’s my job as President to help solve it.” – but most of what leads up to it strains so strenuously to avoid speaking hard truths about how this country is policed that it seems to suggest, in as many words, that the only problem is a perception problem on the part of overly sensitive minorities:

...the concern on the part of too many minority communities that law enforcement is not working with them and dealing with them in a fair way.

communities of color and minority communities that feel that bias is taking place

they’re [cops] only going to be able to do their job effectively if everybody has confidence in the system.

And right now, unfortunately, we are seeing too many instances where people just do not have confidence that folks are being treated fairly.

And I am absolutely committed as President of the United States to making sure that we have a country in which everybody believes in the core principle that we are equal under the law.

And unicorns.

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Today -100: December 3, 1914: Of war credits, presidents, and legitimacy suits

The Reichstag votes $1.25 billion in war credits and adjourns for three months.  The only no vote was socialist Karl Liebknecht’s and the rest of the SPD should be ashamed of itself.

South Africa captures rebel leader Gen. Christiaan De Wet.  It seems that automobiles are better than horses in a chase.

Zapata and Pancho Villa confer, and guess what, they both support different people to be president.

Austrian troops finally occupy Belgrade, which will make a nice present for Emperor Franz Josef for his 66th anniversary as emperor.

The Slingsby legitimacy suit opens in London.  I’ll admit I just clicked on this story because of the glorious phrase “Slingsby legitimacy suit,” but it turns out to be darned interesting. Charles Slingsby, a former lieutenant of the British navy married to an American and living in San Francisco, inherited money and lands in Yorkshire from his father, as did his heir – £100,000 – except his heir died at or soon after birth and so he adopted a child and passed it off as his natural son, or at least that’s the accusation being made by his brothers.  Follow-up: In February 1915, Judge Bargrave Deane, possessor of the most magistratey name in all England, ruled that the baby-substitution story was a fabrication.  He thinks the child (Teddy) looks like his parents, complete with his father’s “peculiarly shaped jaw.”  The judge called in his friend, the sculptor Sir George Frampton, who noticed Teddy’s odd-shaped left ear, which looks like his mother’s.  He’s a funny-looking kid, is what the court is ruling here.  Further follow-up: in 1916 the Court of Appeals overturned Bargrave Deane’s ruling, coming to the conclusion that the evidence that Mrs Slingsby had advertised to adopt a baby while supposedly pregnant (the theory now seems to be that there was never a legitimate baby, and to be fair, there does seem to be a lot of evidence for it, although the other Slingsby brothers were spreading around an awful lot of money in the New World bribing witnesses, so I’m not really sure).  In December 1916 the House of Lords refused to hear the appeal, noting that it was sorry to fuck over Slingsby (now serving again in the military) and his funny-looking bastard child.

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Today -100: December 2, 1914: Of wood, mahans, wardens, and tramps

Headline of the Day -100:  “Germany Won’t Pass Wood.”  No, don’t click: whatever you’re thinking (and you should probably be ashamed of whatever you’re thinking) is much more interesting than the real story.

Admiral Alfred Thayer Mahan, the famous naval strategist, dies. Though important in the US, he was really influential in Germany, whose military leaders (and the kaiser) read his books and decided they needed a big navy to compete with Britain.  Well, it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Pancho Villa arrives in Mexico City.  He says he’s only there to preserve order, and absolutely not to take personal revenge on his enemies.  So... that’s reassuring, I guess.

Thomas Mott Osborne, the new reforming warden of Sing Sing, arrives. You can tell the prisoners love him, because there were no fires, strikes or riots, which is the traditional greeting for a new warden.

There’s a bidding war for Charlie Chaplin, who is leaving Keystone.  Two companies have offered him more than $1,000 a week.

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Today -100: December 1, 1914: Of Gurkhas, war taxes, yellow books, and football

The Norddeutsche Allgemeine Zeitung claims that Britain’s Sikh and Gurkha troops sneak into German trenches at night to slit soldiers’ throats and drink their blood. As you do.

Germany announces more extortion from Belgium, a $7 million per month war tax, which will go to the expenses of occupation.  This is supposedly being imposed as punishment for the shooting of German soldiers by Belgian civilians.  The fines imposed up until now on Belgian cities, it is explained, were just for the widows and children of fallen German soldiers.

Luxembourg, which unlike Belgium rolled over for Germany, has been given $318,000 by German in compensation for damage to fields, roads, etc by the passage of German troops.

France publishes its Yellow Book on the causes of the war.  Evidently it was Germany’s fault.

The owners of British football clubs are not best pleased with the press campaign against them, and say they will stop playing, as is being demanded, when all the theaters, cinemas, golf courses and race tracks also close.

A majority of the US Supreme Court says that the Oklahoma Supreme Court was wrong to uphold a Jim Crow law allowing railroads to provide luxury accommodations – sleeping cars, dining cars, etc – only to whites.  However, they still throw the case out since the petitioners had not been refused such services and lack standing.

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Today -100: November 30, 1914: Love, not dreadnoughts and siege guns, will bring peace to warring Europe

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle says that Sir Roger Casement must have gone literally insane, probably from all that time in the tropics, to have gone to Berlin to negotiate.  The Irish nationalists repudiate Casement.

Woodrow Wilson is going ahead with his plan to settle the Colorado coal strike, even though the mineowners rejected it.  He appoints a commission to settle future differences (or, as the bitterly anti-union LA Times puts it, “President Vents Spite”).  Not that he can force anyone to listen to the commission, so I’m not sure what he thinks he’s accomplishing.

Gen. Pablo Gonzales is reported to have declared himself provisional president of Mexico, because Mexico definitely needed a third one of those.  Can’t have enough provisional presidents, I always say.

The commander of the United States Naval Training Station in Rhode Island bans the song “Tipperary” because it violates Woodrow Wilson’s neutrality order.

Speaking of violating neutrality, Today -100’s Headline of the Day: “Mr. Bryan Evades Embrace. He Had Just Predicted Love Would Bring Peace to Europe.”  A young woman who claimed to be his cousin, but wasn’t, tries to hug him.  There’s never a cameraphone around in 1914 when you need it.

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Today -100: November 29, 1914: Beware the French Dragons!

France and Germany and Austria will exchange civilian prisoners aged 45-60 who are medically unfit for military service.

NYT Index Typo of the Day -100: “DRAGONS WRECKED GERMAN AIR FLEET; French War Office Describes Night Attack of Cavalry on an Aeroplane Camp.”  What are French dragons like?  I picture him wearing a beret, with a Galois hanging from the corner of his mouth.

German newspapers are trying to reassure the public that the Russian winter isn’t really so bad for German soldiers.  In fact, according to the professors being trotted out, severe cold kills germs and is therefore healthy (cholera has already broken out among some soldiers).

Norway’s women’s suffrage society (est. 1885) dissolves, because they won.  In Norway suffrage was granted in installments (local elections to women paying a certain amount of tax in 1896, in state elections in 1907, county elections in 1910 for women over 25, and equal votes in 1913.

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Today -100: November 28, 1914: Of football, fighting clergy, disguised steamers, impudent good will, and muffs

London newspaper owners jointly decide to stop reporting on football beyond the scores.  If that doesn’t make everyone join the army, I don’t know what will.

Headline of the Day -100:  “German Clergymen Want To Fight.”  Some clergymen in Berlin protest being exempted (I guess actually barred) from the military.  It’s an insult, they say.

Churches are not exempt from military service, however.  At least according to the London Morning Post, which claims that the German army has put machine guns and anti-aircraft guns in the towers of Cracow Catholic churches to lure Russia into bombing them, thereby alienating the Poles.

German schoolboys have been “volunteering” for military training at their schools.  They will go to the front in the spring as young as 16.

Headline of the Day -100:  “Lusitania Drops Disguise.”  Arrives in New York painted in its Cunard Line colors again, after having been cunningly disguised for two months by being painted black.

British newspapers are castigating former diplomat Sir Roger Casement for going to Berlin and getting a statement from the kaiser that Germany would never invade Ireland (which the Daily News calls “an impudent message of good will”).  Casement is also negotiating for more concrete aid for Irish rebels.

Turkey has decided not to default on its pre-war bonds.  But it will pay the interest only in person at the Ministry of Finance in Constantinople.  Just make your way through the front lines, foreigners who hold most of the bonds.

Headline of the Day -100:  “WANT MUFFS FOR SOLDIERS.; German Officer Appeals to Women to Send Their Furs.”  Say, what sort of war is this, anyway?

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Today -100: November 27, 1914: We will again save the republic

Carranza arrives at Vera Cruz, declares it the new capital, or temporary capital, or something.  “We will again save the republic,” Carranza says.

Prime Minister Asquith says he won’t bring in legislation to ban football.  Or to seize all football grounds for military purposes.  Yet.

Fog of War (Rumors, Propaganda and Just Plain Bullshit) of the Day -100: Germany accuses Britain of a war crime: a British airplane was forced down behind German lines, and beside the pilot was a German prisoner, very cold and very naked, who’d been taken up in an attempt to scare him into revealing military secrets.  The pilot was then shot.

Headline of the Day -100 (LA Times):  “Russian Girl is Crucified.”  Another Fog of War story, one hopes.

A British battleship, the Bulwark, blows up in Sheerness Harbour, killing 738 of the crew. Not enemy action. Maybe it’s not a good idea to store shells next to the boiler room bulkhead after all.

Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes denies Leo Frank a writ of error on technical grounds, but expresses doubt that he received a fair trial, given the presence of a threatening mob.

Retired Tammany Boss Richard Croker’s marriage comes off. Since he was marrying an Indian, there was a crowd in front of the church of “ragamuffins in black face and motley attire, masquerading in honor of Thanksgiving Day”.  Elsewhere in the paper, the NYT complains that “Army of Beggars Mar Thanksgiving.”

This blog wishes you and your army of beggars a happy Thanksgiving.

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Today -100: November 26, 1914: Of pardons, Bavarians, football, Christmas ships, internment camps, and Indian maids

Outgoing South Carolina Gov. Coleman Blease will pardon or commute the sentences of 75 prisoners for Thanksgiving.  I’m still not sure what’s up with his campaign to use his pardon power to empty the jails.

Fog of War (Rumors, Propaganda and Just Plain Bullshit) of the Day -100: More stories about how disaffected the Bavarian troops supposedly are, fraternizing with French soldiers and not shooting at them but into the air.  I’m not sure whether this propaganda campaign (at least, I’m pretty sure it’s not true) is aimed at reassuring the French or dividing the Germans.

After the weekend, the British newspapers conducted a tut-tut campaign about how many healthy young male spectators there were at football matches and how few of them responded to army recruiters.  So the next step is a campaign to ban football, because of course it is.  A question will be asked in Parliament tomorrow.

One of the ways in which the US is helping out with the war is the “Christmas ship,” a philanthropic scheme to send presents to European children (and sell copies of the newspapers sponsoring the scheme, of course).  It was the least we could do.

The Duchess of Marlborough (née Consuelo Vanderbilt) has zeppelin-proofed her London home, Sunderland House.

Germany orders a census of all the animals in Germany, for rationing purposes.  Also, to save flour, Berlin bakers are banned from baking bread more than twice a day, which they do because everyone prefers fresh bread.  Berliners will eat stale bread and by god they’ll like it, officials declare.

British guards shot several rioting interned Germans at the detention camp on the Isle of Man.  News of this has reached Germany and there are now fears of reprisals against British prisoners.

Zapata’s forces move into  Mexico City as Gen. Blanco’s forces hastily depart, leaving barely any time for mobs to form and start looting. This is why you need to be prepared and draw up a shopping list.  Pancho Villa plans to enter the capital tomorrow.

Headline of the Day -100:  “Croker Is To Wed Indian Maid Today.”  Richard Croker, the former Boss of Tammany Hall, will marry Beulah Edmonson, a Cherokee woman “who last year rode a pony and sang Indian songs in the Hippodrome,” and rode a horse at the head of a suffrage parade in D.C..  The NYT says she’s 50 years younger than him, but it’s really 40, 41 years, tops.

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Today -100: November 25, 1914: Of invasions, missionaries & dwarfs, salaams, and Florida property

H.G. Wells suggested that if Germany invaded Britain, civilians should defend the country with carving knives or any other weapons they could find.  The government is trying to shut down this sort of talk (which would violate the rules of war and make the entire population of Britain legitimate military targets), but won’t say what it’s plans in case of invasion actually are.

Headline of the Day -100:  “German Missionary Tries to Blow Up Ship.”  In West Africa somewhere, a British gunboat called the Dwarf.  He says he’s a soldier first and a missionary afterward.

Fog of War (Rumors, Propaganda and Just Plain Bullshit) of the Day -100 / Headline of the Day -100: “Salaams of Indian Stay German Fire.”  One of Britain’s Indian troops was scouting at night when a German spotlight fell on him.  He started salaaming (bowing) his way to the Germans, where he pretended to be a disaffected colonial who just wanted to fight the British.  The next day he said he could come back with more like-minded Indians, so they let him go, like the lunk-headed Germans they are, not realizing that every single subject of the Raj is completely loyal to the king.

That article says that the Indians in Europe have been engaged in trenching and counter-trenching.  I have no idea what that means and no, Google, I did NOT mean “define contour-trenching.”

More Fog? Germany is said to be dismantling locomotives for their copper and brass, to make more bullets.

Zapata’s forces are entering Mexico City, which Carranza’s troops have all left.

E.C. Chambers, on trial for using the mails to defraud by the sale of Florida (swamp)land, claims that William Jennings Bryan himself inspected the land back in ought-ten and declared it perfectly good land (though under two feet of water) and later bought some.

I don’t normally do birth anniversaries here, but what the hell: Joe DiMaggio, whose autograph my father failed to get twice, once in the 1940s and once in the 1970s.

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There’s never an excuse for violence

I’m reading Obama’s comments on the Ferguson grand jury rather than watching them on tv because I can’t stand to hear his voice any more. To be fair, there hasn’t been a president in my lifetime whose voice I could stand to hear this far into their presidency.

“our police officers put their lives on the line for us every single day.” They sure put SOMEONE’s lives on the line every single day.

“As they do their jobs in the coming days, they need to work with the community, not against the community, to distinguish the handful of people who may use the grand jury’s decision as an excuse for violence...” Okay, this is my first Fuck You, Obama Moment™ in this address. You can argue that violence, setting a police car on fire, for example, is not the appropriate response, but the word “excuse” suggests that Some People just love them some violence and have no other motivation beyond their love of violence, and don’t really care about Michael Brown at all.

“...distinguish them from the vast majority who just want their voices heard around legitimate issues in terms of how communities and law enforcement interact.” The police don’t get to decide what “legitimate issues” are. Also, Obama, since you inserted that word “legitimate” in there, maybe you can tell us which issues related to cops shooting unarmed black kids are illegitimate? Because we’d really like to know.

“The fact is, in too many parts of this country, a deep distrust exists between law enforcement and communities of color.” How many parts is the right number?

“And there are good people on all sides of this debate”. There are also a lot of assholes. But I’ll bet you won’t talk about them.

“We have made enormous progress in race relations over the course of the past several decades. I’ve witnessed that in my own life. And to deny that progress I think is to deny America’s capacity for change.” This just occurred to me, and I haven’t read his memoirs, but has Obama ever talked about any discrimination he has personally felt in his life?

“there are issues in which the law too often feels as if it is being applied in discriminatory fashion.” How often is the right amount?

“That [progress] won’t be done by throwing bottles. That won’t be done by smashing car windows. That won’t be done by using this as an excuse to vandalize property.” There’s that word again.

“Those of you who are watching tonight understand that there’s never an excuse for violence”. Tell that to the fucking grand jury.

Or the Iraqis, Afghans, etc, yeah yeah, but I think we all know “there’s never an excuse for violence” was never intended to apply to Johnny Foreigner.

“But I think that we have to make sure that we focus at least as much attention on all those positive activities that are taking place as we do on a handful of folks who end up using this as an excuse...” You’re really beginning to piss me off, dude. “...to misbehave...” Oo, I love it when he talks to us like we’re naughty children. “...or to break the law...” Yeah, I don’t think anyone’s too impressed with “the law” this evening. “...or to engage in violence.” “There is inevitably going to be some negative reaction, and it will make for good TV.” I mean, not “Breaking Bad” good, but still pretty good.

Oh, and I hear Officer Wilson is engaged, and not to a big hairy cellmate named Bubba. Congratulations, Officer Wilson!

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Today -100: November 24, 1914: That’s a lot of bullets

After seven months, the American occupation of Vera Cruz ends, “with little show of enthusiasm on the part of the Mexicans.”  In the end, they just left, without deciding to which of the competing Mexican regimes to hand over the port, the customs house, and seven months of customs duties.  Carranza’s soldiers take over the town, following two blocks behind the withdrawing Americans, and issue orders that everyone has to turn in their weapons or face execution, anyone who commits crimes will face execution, and all the saloons are closed until further notice.  Which probably explains the lack of enthusiasm.

Headline of the Day -100:  “Wilson To Receive Women.”  For Christmas?  Actually, he will receive and, I’m gonna predict, condescend to, a women’s suffrage deputation.

The Belgian authorities in Antwerp are refusing to pay the fine demanded by Germany until they stop requisitioning anything they want from the city.

Germany complains to the US and other neutral nations that Britain is violating the laws of the sea in seizing what it declares to be contraband.

Someone or other has calculated that it takes 168 pounds of bullets, which is 5,860 bullets, to kill a man on the Belgian front.

Headline of the Day -100:  “Football, Not War, Attracts English.”  English newspapers are working themselves into a froth, as is the custom, over this.  Recruiters at Saturday’s games succeeded in getting only one man to take the king’s shilling.  Now that the first giddy rush to arms is over, recruitment is way down. They’ve raised the pay, already the highest in Europe (they’re the only warring country without conscription) and reduced the minimum height to 5’3”.

A British patrol trawler, the Dorothy Gray, rams a German U-boat, the U-18, off Scotland’s coast, causing it to founder and surrender.  26 crew are taken prisoner, only one died.

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Today -100: November 23, 1914: Of spies, plots, and again being a state

Fog of War (Rumors, Propaganda and Just Plain Bullshit) of the Day -100: the Allies have reportedly shot René Colaert, the mayor of Ypres (which is currently being destroyed by the battle of the same name; the town hall was blown up yesterday), as a spy for Germany.  None of which is true.

Russia arrests several Social Democratic members of the Duma for a supposed revolutionary plot to overthrow the state.

More Fog, from the Morning Post (UK): Kaiser Wilhelm is said to have demanded that Austria transfer all its troops to the defense of East Prussia because he thinks Austria itself is a lost cause. The Austrians would prefer that German troops help them defend Cracow. There’s also a story that retreating German and Austrian troops quarreled and shot at each other.

Still more Fog? Honestly, I don’t believe anything I’m reading today.  The military governor of the Austrian fortress of Cracow says civilians aren’t obeying his order to leave the city fast enough, so he’ll have any that don’t do so shot.

A committee of the Colorado Legislature demands that outgoing Governor Ammons “prepare to accept for the people of this State the responsibility of again being a State” and send the national guard back into the strike regions so that federal troops can leave.  They want him to issue a proclamation that everyone should obey the law and refrain from “incendiary utterances” and tweets, and make clear that every able-bodied man from 18 to 45 is a member of the state militia whether they like it or not. The governor-elect talks of deporting from the state any strikers who break the law.  Neither governor suggests that the mining companies accept Wilson’s proposed truce, much less negotiate in good faith with the miners.

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Today -100: November 22, 1914: Of unfriendly unhostile acts, free countries, swapped giants, and little lord fauntleroys

Turkey explains why it fired on a US launch in Smyrna.  See, they were just friendly warning shots, warning the launch that the harbor was mined and they shouldn’t enter it.  The Wilson administration is pretending to believe this, although we’re not quite sure what the captain of the Tennessee believes, since he reported the shots as “unfriendly” but also as “not intended as a hostile act,” whatever all that means.  It also seems that US embassy was informed that the port of Smyrna had been closed but didn’t have the means of communicating that information to US Navy ships.

The NYT Magazine asks “Did You Ever Hear of a Free Country Called Moresnet?”  Moresnet was a tiny sort-of-nation between Belgium and Germany, sort of jointly but very loosely administered by both, without a real government or courts.  And (Spoiler Alert) it won’t last long.

Evidently not just Carranza fled Mexico City, but also the entire police force.

Headline of the Day -100:  “Swap Giant for Dwarfs.”  William Hempstead, an eight-foot-tall Englishman stuck in Germany at the start of the war, is exchanged for two Germans who are under two feet tall, and are you fucking kidding me?

Headline of the Day -100:  “LORD FAUNTLEROY,' ORIGINAL, MARRIES.”  That’s Vivian Burnett, the son of novelist Frances Hodgson Burnett, is forever stuck with being called Little Lord Fauntleroy, the effeminate character his mother modeled on him.  Indeed, in 1937 the NYT reported his death at 61 under the headline “Original Fauntleroy Dies in Boat After Helping Rescue 4 in Sound.”

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Today -100: November 21, 1914: Of uniforms, knives, vicious lobsters, and illicit newspapers

Headline of the Day -100:  “Leaves Battle Front to Visit His Tailor; Marquis of Anglesey, His Coat Shot Away, in London for New Uniforms.”  The article notes that his uniform may have been more than usually fragile because it was made by a fashionable tailor, and that the previous Maquis of Anglesey, “Toppy” Paget, was renowned for his wardrobe of more than 300 coats (and for cross-dressing, but the NYT doesn’t mention that part).

Mexican Rumor of the Day -100: Gen. Lucio Blanco is now in charge, having imprisoned Gen. Obregón.

The US has decided to keep the customs duties it collected while occupying Vera Cruz until there’s a stable government in Mexico.  Could be a while.

Headline of the Day -100:  “Slew 1,200 With Knives.”  Moroccan troops.  Either the French didn’t trust with guns or they simply didn’t need them.  They attack Germans who were desecrating a graveyard at Tracy-le-Val by digging trenches in it.  I’m guessing there’s some slight exaggeration in this story from Le Temps.

Headline of the Day -100:  “Bitten By Vicious Lobster.”  A helper in the kitchens of the Hotel Klein in New Brunswick, NJ, is bitten on the finger by a lobster he was trying to grill.  He had to go to the hospital for more than a month and has now won $210 + medical expenses in court.  Don’t know what happened to the vicious lobster, who I have decided was named Harold, but I fear the worst.

Canada bans four German newspapers.  It is now illegal to sell or even possess one.

The British Parliament votes to raise another 1 million soldiers, in addition to the existing 1.1 million.  They are assured that will be quite enough to ensure victory.

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We’ll miss her when she’s gone. She is going, right? Please tell me she’s going.

Michele Bachmann complains about Obama’s immigration policy: “millions of unskilled, illiterate, foreign nationals coming into the United States who can’t speak the English language.” And they’ll take away jobs producing hilariously oblivious straight lines from hard-working American idiots.

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Today -100: November 20, 1914: Of bigger armies, volunteer prisoners, and squandered shells

Headline of the Day -100:  “Taft for a Bigger Army.” Also, bigger pants, bathtubs, pies.  However, he supports Wilson’s policy of staying out of the European war.

After multiple scandals at Sing Sing, the new warden will be Thomas Mott Osborne, a prison reformer who spent a week as a volunteer prisoner in Auburn Prison last year, just like Robert Redford in that movie, and wrote a book about it.  He is opposed to capital punishment and won’t attend executions, but says if there are to be executions, they should be public.

Headline of the Day -100:  “Squandered Shells to Please the Kaiser.”  While he was touring the front.

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