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John McCain posted this picture with the caption “@JoeLieberman @Grahamblog & I had good meetings with Iraqi leaders in Baghdad today at a crucial time.”
Judging by McCain’s appearance, I think by “crucial time” he meant that he needed to go to the bathroom.
Can we do better than John McCain? CAPTION CONTEST!
When I wrote my post on McConnell’s Heritage Foundation speech last week, I deleted mention of one piece of moronity. Talking about the stimulus, he said, “And it shouldn’t be lost on anybody, by the way, that the only one that refused a bailout, Ford, is the one that’s doing best today.” Yes, clearly what hurt Chrysler and GM was accepting the bailout money. The logic is inescapable.
Yesterday was the day before election day, the day traditionally known in Tammany as “Dough Day,” when all the money is distributed to district leaders (although Boss Murphy, who has delusions of respectability, likes to call it Paraphernalia Day).
A Wright Brothers’ plane carried some silk for a dry goods company – the first ever commercial air flight.
From NYT story about people who object to tolerance programs in schools:
“We do not want the minds of our children to be polluted with the things of a carnal-minded society,” Mr. DeMato, 69, told his flock at Liberty Baptist Church.
But what about you, readers? Are your minds polluted with the things of a carnal-minded society? Let’s put it to a little test. When you read that quote did you think
a) He probably hates gay people because he’s sixty-nine years old.
b) What an odd sexual position from which to deliver a sermon.
c) DeMato, DeMahto, let’s call the whole thing off.
If you chose a, your mind is not unduly polluted with the things of a carnal-minded society. If you chose b, your mind is in fact quite polluted with the things of a carnal-minded society. If you chose c, you’re just weird.
Several thousand Catholics marched in Washington D.C. to protest against profanity.
Dix and Stimson hold a debate of sorts, via telegram. Stimson sent a series of questions, mostly about tariffs, to Dix, who now responds, denying any inconsistency in his demands for a reduction in tariffs. Tariffs, with their “natural offspring – the trusts and combinations – which have increased the cost of the necessaries of life. No one knows this better than you, for you and your former law partner, Senator Root, had charge of the organization of more trusts and combinations than any other firm of corporation lawyers in the country.” (The governor of New York, of course, has nothing whatsoever to do with tariff policy.)
The National American Woman’s Suffrage Association says that 20% of Republican and Democratic candidates for Congress are in favor of women’s suffrage. That is, 180 of 672 candidates replied to NAWSA’s survey, of whom 107 (64 D’s, 43 R’s) support full suffrage, 36 (21 D’s, 15 R’s) favor partial suffrage (municipal or school board but not federal, for example), and 9 (all D’s) were completely opposed. The rest gave noncommittal replies.
Do conservatives really call Marco Rubio the “great right hope”? Trust the Repugs to adapt a racist term for a brown-skinned guy.
Mitch McConnell’s post-election speech at the Heritage Foundation, though widely quoted in snippets, is worth a skim.
“By sticking together in principled opposition to policies we viewed as harmful, we made it perfectly clear to the American people where we stood.” Well, you made it perfectly clear what you stood against, which is not the same thing. He doesn’t seem to know the difference.
He complains that since the 2008 election, “The Democrats’ idea of consensus was for Republicans to do whatever the administration wanted us to.” Which was bad. So he presents his idea of consensus, which you’ll be surprised to hear is for Obama to do whatever McConnell wants him to do: “If the administration wants cooperation, it will have to begin to move in our direction.” No hint that cooperation could ever involve the R’s moving in Obama’s direction.
But of course they can’t do that, because the Republicans are the American people and speak for them: “The formula is simple, really: when the administration agrees with the American people, we will agree with the administration. When it disagrees with the American people, we won’t. This has been our posture from the beginning of this administration. And we intend to stick with it.” Take a moment and just take in the arrogance of that statement. Also note that he can’t be saying that the position of the American people, with which the administration is invited to “agree,” was set forth by this week’s election, since that simple formula has been “our posture from the beginning of this administration.” That is, from January 2009 to November 2010, when the House, Senate, and presidency were all dominated by Democrats elected by the American people. So elections must be irrelevant to the determination of the position of the American people, which is always conservative and always unitary. Hard to know why the Republicans bother to let us vote really; we might just continue to elect people who don’t agree with the American people.
The Arizona Constitutional Convention is fighting over whether to include the local option for prohibition.
Dr. Crippen loses his appeal against the death penalty for killing his wife (or whoever that torso was), and will be hanged in a couple of day.
A few days ago, Henry L. Stimson, Republican candidate for governor of NY, spoke to several campaign rallies in NYC, driving from one to the next, while Roosevelt did the same 20 minutes later, so that if people wanted to hear TR, they’d have to sit through Stimson. Yesterday, the Saturday before election day, Stimson repeated the performance, but without TR as his closing act, so that the audiences were rather smaller, in one case so small that he refused to speak. There was a large audience at a Cooper Union meeting which amounted to “a grand testimonial meeting in favor of Theodore Roosevelt,” whose name was repeatedly cheered and who was praised to the skies by all the speakers, who “accepted the charge that he is the issue in this campaign”. Gov. John Franklin Fort of NJ said TR was at least as great as Lincoln and “as great as any man that ever lived and wrought in this land”. A man in the audience who called for him to “keep to state issues” was threatened by members of the audience until he left.
Pope Pius X has instructed the papal nuncio of Munich to order ecclesiastics under his authority not to read newspapers.
H.B. Hutchins, president of the University of Michigan, urges women students to study only subjects that would fit them to become homemakers and mothers. “Deliver me from the woman who comes to the university to prepare for a career.”
And a NYT editorial declares that women’s suffrage is unnecessary and that women themselves “do not favor suffrage for their sex, for very good and sane reasons”.
A meeting of Muslims in Constantinople acclaims Kaiser Wilhelm the “true protector of Islam” and appeals to him to save Persia from Anglo-Russian aggression.
Judge Simeon Baldwin, Dem. candidate for governor of Connecticut, says he will sue Roosevelt for slander for misrepresenting his views on labor law.
Roosevelt gives a speech in Cleveland, although since his progressives are not in charge of the Ohio Republican Party, he didn’t have much to say about the actual candidates. This is the sum total of what he said about gubernatorial candidate Warren G. Harding: “If Mr. Harding is elected you will have a governor who will put through a public utilities bill.” I don’t think they’d invented the bumper sticker yet but wouldn’t that be a great one?
State prohibition amendments will be up for vote by the electors in Florida, Missouri, Oregon and Texas, while Oklahoma will vote on substituting local option for the current state-wide prohibition.
Oklahoma, South Dakota, and Washington’s male voters will vote on women’s suffrage and Oregon’s on granting suffrage to all taxpayers, regardless of sex. Oregonians will vote on 32 initiatives and referenda, including two on liquor and one for a constitutional convention.
One place there won’t be elections any time soon is Nicaragua, where members of the regime of self-proclaimed Nicaraguan President Estrada sign a convention keeping him in power another two years. The US Special Commissioner Thomas C. Dawson also signs, although with what authority is unclear.
In Britain, suffragists will begin a “suffrage demonstration week” in favor of the women’s suffrage bill. So was the NYT headline “Votes for Women Weak” a typo or a pun or what?
A war between the US and Germany seems inevitable, says the NYT (although Germany thinks the US is bluffing). A tariff war. Over potash. That is, fertilizer.
Today -1 I ran the first Today -100 post. Seems like only Today -0.75, doesn’t it?
The Chinese emperor decrees the establishment of an Imperial Parliament in 1913. “The police went from house to house informing the occupants of the edict.”
Rumors are going around Panama that Taft’s forthcoming visit is part of a plan to annex it to the United States. This has been denied.
The writer of a letter to the Times shares a pamphlet he received which was put out on behalf of the Prohibition Party, “Fruits of the Liquor Traffic: a Brief Record of 100 Murders Caused by Drink,” by Gomer D. Reese. One of these “murders” was one Harris Cohen, aged 70, who, the letter-writer relates, no doubt paraphrasing slightly, “feeling unwell, viciously and deliberately entered a saloon in Trenton, N.J., calling for and obtaining a ‘seltzer,’ and having publicly imbibed the same, incontinently fell dead of heart disease. Will Mr. Reese kindly explain, before this cruel campaign is over, just what he would have us learn from this horrible example? 1. Was the seltzer very bad? 2. Or, being good, was the said awful Cohen so accustomed to stronger drink that the shock of plain seltzer slew him? 3. Is it wicked to drink seltzer? 4. Had we not better drink nothing?”
All good questions.
Henry L. Stimson reviews yesterday’s Carnegie Hall speech by his rival John A. Dix: “Canting and sickening hypocrisy, calculated to turn a man’s stomach.” The hypocrisy is that Dix wants tariffs reduced, but two years ago his partner in the wallpaper biz asked for increased duty on imported wallpaper. Aren’t you offended by Dix’s “sanctimonious cant”? Stimson thinks you should be.
This afternoon Obama held a press conference on the subject of how it’s all the economy’s fault.
THOSE WHO HAD BOTH WON AND LOST? HOW VERY ZEN: “Last night I had a chance to speak to the leaders of the House and the Senate and reached out to those who had both won and lost in both parties.”
LIKE WHEN BIDEN GETS INTO THE BOURBON: “I can tell you that some election nights are more fun than others.”
MOSTLY THEY SAID “WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY BACKYARD?” “Over the last few months I’ve had the opportunity to travel around the country and meet people where they live and where they work, from backyards to factory floors. I did some talking, but mostly I did a lot of listening.” Obama is renowned for his listening skills.
What Obama has learned during the course of all this listening, is that “People are frustrated -- they’re deeply frustrated -- with the pace of our economic recovery and the opportunities that they hope for their children and their grandchildren.” See, they’re not frustrated with him, it’s with the economy. And not even the trend of the economy, but the pace of that trend. So it’s all good.
WAIT, THERE’S A REASON? “There’s a reason we have two parties in this country, and both Democrats and Republicans have certain beliefs and certain principles that each feels cannot be compromised.” Funny, I’m pretty sure we have more than two parties. I mean, I voted for candidates from three parties yesterday.
ALTHOUGH ONE SEEMS TO HAVE A MONOPOLY ON TRI-CORNER HATS: “As I’ve said before, no person, no party, has a monopoly on wisdom.”
WHAT HE DO BELIEVE: “I do believe there is hope for civility.”
IT ALMOST SEEMS LIKE HE’S TALKING ABOUT SOMETHING OTHER THAN THE ECONOMIC SITUATION HERE: “And that’s because I believe in the resiliency of a nation that’s bounced back from much worse than what we’re going through right now -- a nation that’s overcome war and depression”. So get bouncing, America.
AP’s Ben Feller asks if “who do you think speaks to the true voice of the American people right now: you or John Boehner?” Oddly, Obama never addressed that important question, although I guess if we hear the true voice of the American people and it’s either unsettlingly robotic or choking back tears, we’ll have the answer.
If you were waiting for a big admission of his shortcomings, here it is: “And we were in such a hurry to get things done that we didn’t change how things got done. And I think that frustrated people.”
WHAT HE’S NOT GOING TO ANTICIPATE THAT THEY’RE NOT GOING TO, WAIT, WHAT? “Well, what is absolutely true is, is that without any Republican support on anything, then it’s going to be hard to get things done. But I’m not going to anticipate that they’re not going to support anything.”
Jake Tapper asks the big question: “what does it feel like?” Obama: “It feels bad.”
WHAT THE SMARTEST THING FOR US TO DO IS: “I think the smartest thing for us to do is to see if we can get Democrats and Republicans in a room who are serious about energy independence and are serious about keeping our air clean and our water clean and dealing with the issue of greenhouse gases”. So, not a very large room. Which saves on the cost of heating it. See, where’re half-way there?
POSSIBLY THE MOST DISTURBING-SOUNDING SENTENCE OBAMA HAS EVER UTTERED: “Cap and trade was just one way of skinning the cat; it was not the only way.”
He says eliminating Don’t Ask Don’t Tell shouldn’t be a partisan issue.
WHAT HE DOESN’T THINK ANYBODY DENIES: “So I don’t think anybody denies they think we’re in a ditch. I just don’t think they feel like we’ve gotten all the way out of the ditch yet. And to move the analogy forward that I used in the campaign, I think what they want right now is the Democrats and the Republicans both pushing some more to get the car on level ground. And we haven’t done that.” In this analogy is the Auto Club China?
Hans Nichols of Bloomberg asks “if you’re going to have John Boehner over for a Slurpee”. Obama: “they’re delicious drinks.” Boehner would get an orange Slurpee, of course.
WHAT THERE IS A INHERENT DANGER IN: “There is a inherent danger in being in the White House and being in the bubble. I mean, folks didn’t have any complaints about my leadership style when I was running around Iowa for a year.” So maybe you should be doing that, then. Also, you didn’t have a leadership style per se because you weren’t actually a, you know, leader yet.
WHAT THEY WERE ABLE TO DO: “And they got a pretty good look at me up close and personal, and they were able to lift the hood and kick the tires”. They did what you to you now? Show us on this Tonka truck where the Iowans touched you.
WHAT ONE OF THE CHALLENGES THAT WE’VE GOT TO THINK ABOUT IS: “And one of the challenges that we’ve got to think about is how do I meet my responsibilities here in the White House, which require a lot of hours and a lot of work, but still have that opportunity to engage with the American people on a day-to-day basis, and know -- give them confidence that I’m listening to them. Those letters that I read every night, some of them just break my heart. Some of them provide me encouragement and inspiration. But nobody is filming me reading those letters.” Well, they should probably get right on that.
“But, I mean, I think it’s important to point out as well that a couple of great communicators, Ronald Reagan and Bill Clinton, were standing at this podium two years into their presidency getting very similar questions because the economy wasn’t working the way it needed to be and there were a whole range of factors that made people concerned that maybe the party in power wasn’t listening to them.” Well, to be fair, Clinton had someone behind the podium giving him a blow job, and Reagan was staring off into space waiting for the director to tell him to get on a horse.
So evidently, presidential popularity is entirely a function of the economy and nothing to do with his policies. He could be Reagan or Clinton or Millard Fucking Fillmore. I’m pretty sure this is exactly the message the American people were hoping for from him.
WHAT HE’S NOT RECOMMENDING: “now, I’m not recommending for every future President that they take a shellacking...”
Although about the time President Palin takes office, Bristol should be giving birth to little baby Shellac.
NOW HE’S JUST TALKING ABOUT EVOLUTION TO PISS THE REPUBLICANS OFF: “But I do think that this is a growth process and an evolution.”
WELL, THE SEX JUST IS’NT THAT GOOD ANYMORE: “And the relationship that I’ve had with the American people is one that built slowly, peaked at this incredible high, and then during the course of the last two years, as we’ve, together, gone through some very difficult times, has gotten rockier and tougher.”
WHAT MAKES HIM COME AWAY FEELING SO MUCH MORE OPTIMISTIC ABOUT THIS COUNTRY: “because when I travel around the country, even in the toughest of these debates -- in the midst of health care last year during the summer when there were protesters about, and when I’m meeting families who’ve lost loved ones in Afghanistan or Iraq -- I always come away from those interactions just feeling so much more optimistic about this country.” Well that makes it all okay.
News you can use from the Daily Telegraph:
“Tanzania Elects First Albino MP.” Instead of chopping him up to use his body parts in witchcraft, so that’s progress.
A poll of 14,144 British men reveals that Salvador Dali has the most famous mustache. Hitler isn’t even on the top 10 list, though Chaplin is. I smell a fix.
More revelations from Bush’s memoirs: Vladimir Putin bragged to Bush about the size of his... dog. He said it was bigger than Barney.
A metaphor for the state of international relations? “Barack Obama Sex Doll for Sale in China.” Oh sure, the Telegraph has a picture of that, but not of the albino.
“Yes we can”
Name of the Day -100: a St. Louis former Republican Party ward boss and famous “character” has bet that he can drink 20 pints of beer every day for 30 days. He says he has a “system” for managing all that beer, and that he will win or die in the attempt. Oh yes, his name: Abe Slupsky. Almost an onomatopoeia.
NY Democratic gubernatorial candidate John A. Dix gives his only major election speech in the city of New York, at Carnegie Hall. The NYT notes that many women were present in the audience. Mayor Gaynor was unable to make a speech (having been shot in the throat in August), but he did send a letter of endorsement alluding to the Republicans’ alliance with “political scamps,” which everyone understood to mean William Randolph Hearst. Dix pretty much ignored Stimson in his speech and directed his attacks to Roosevelt, calling him “the apostle of tumult and the protagonist of misrepresentation,” an “instigator of panic” and the “destructive agent of business depression.” He also referred to TR’s “inordinate vanity,” “dangerous ambition,” “reckless conduct,” and lack of dignity and self-respect. I guess that pretty much covers it.
Dix’s speech was interrupted by a suffragist, Maud Malone, who was ejected. What she said, the NYT didn’t report.
I misread the headline “Drop Kickers at Harvard” as “Drop Knickers at Harvard.” I don’t know if that says something about me, about 1910, about Harvard, or possibly about all three.
Headline of the Day -100: “Jersey Poll Lists Full of Dummies.” They said it, not me.
First, fuck you Wisconsin and the cheese you rode in on.
Second, I lost. Well, Christine O’Donnell lost, but she’s me.
This morning I received a phone call from Susan Sarandon telling me to vote for Prop. 19 (marijuana legalization). Naturally, I do anything Susan Sarandon tells me to do (since the lemon juice scene in Atlantic City).
Lexington, Kentucky elects an openly gay mayor, Jim Gray. As far as I know, it wasn’t even an issue, as opposed to the 2004 US Senate race in Kentucky, where Jim Bunning’s proxies made unsubtle suggestions that the D. candidate, Daniel Mongiardo, was gay – the state senate president called him “a limp wrist” – and Mongiardo responded by trumpeting his hatred of teh gay. Mongiardo, who has since married – a woman – ran again this year but lost the D. primary to Jack Conway, who just lost to idiot Rand Paul.
Since Roland Burris was an appointee, his replacement takes office not in January but as soon as the Ill. election is certified, at which point there will be no black senators.
On the other hand, Tim Scott (from South Carolina) will be the first black Republican congresscritter since J.C. Watts left in 2003. Scott beat Strom Thurmond’s son in the primary.
Oklahoma, where the wind, as I understand it, comes sweepin’ down the plain, but not from Mecca, bans sharia law. In fact, State Question 755 (the “SOS Amendment”) bans the use by OK courts of any international law, so it might not be as irrelevant to the real world as it’s generally been portrayed.
News from the Daily Telegraph: a 10-year-old gives birth in Spain.
“Sicilian Bandit King’s Skeleton Is Too Short” (Salvatore Giuliano, supposedly killed and buried in 1949, evidently faked his death).
“Harry Potter Blamed for India’s Disappearing Owls” (for children’s parties and, sigh, sacrifices).
And I’ve been remiss in not mentioning Silvio Berlusconi’s latest scandal, intervening to get a 17-year-old illegal immigrant Moroccan bellydancer (and not a prostitute at all, she says) who goes by the nom de bellydance “Ruby” released from police custody after she was arrested for theft. He told the cops she was the granddaughter of Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak. She is not. Evidently she and the PM met at a “bunga bunga” party, which refers either to some sort of sex act (possibly imparted to Silvio by Qadafi)(!) or to a dirty joke, evidently involving a pair of his political enemies and the sexual practices of a tribe of African cannibals. I’d hoped to find the exact sex act/joke before posting, but we can’t have everything.
This is the second time the term “bunga bunga” has appeared in this blog; the last time it was uttered by Virginia Woolf and friends in a rather different context.
Ruby (who says she never had sex with Berlusconi) is writing a book.
Berlusconi says, “I have a gruelling work schedule and if I happen to look pretty girls in the face now and then, it’s better to be passionate about beautiful women than to be gay.” She’s 17 years old. He’s 73.
And, not surprisingly, Berlusconi’s package catches on fire.
There is a rumor of a revolution in Spain.
A false rumor.
Speaking of false rumors, a false rumor that Jews ritually killed a Muslim girl sets off a pogrom in the Jewish quarter of Shiraz in Persia. 12 Jews were killed and every house in the quarter was systematically looted.
In the absence of opinion polling, the NYT keeps reporting on wagering. For example, a week before the election, Dix is favored 3:1 over Stimson.
In Chicago, “Mounted police today charged mobs of striking garment workers and made numerous arrests, only to be dumfounded when met by groups of clubwomen and society leaders, who, when arrested, produced calling cards in lieu of bail bonds. It was a new experience for the police, and it plainly confused them. ...Most of the clubwomen... were garbed as working girls and the police could not distinguish them from strikers until after arrests were made.” It must indeed have been very confusing for the cops not to know who it was permissible to beat and arrest. For example, one clubwoman was, um, clubbed. The NYT keeps using the word “riot” but never describes any behaviour that would justify the term.
In the year ending June 30, 1910, 3,804 people were killed in the US in railroad accidents and 82,374 injured. There were 5,861 collisions and 5,910 derailments.
In a campaign speech for Henry L. Stimson, Teddy Roosevelt says “we stand against the worst alliance of crooked politicians and crooked business that this state has seen, or this city has seen, since the days of Tweed.”
At a Stimson campaign rally in the Grand Music Hall in NYC, the man introducing him noted that when Stimson was a US District Attorney he hired Felix Frankfurter out of Harvard, even after Frankfurter explained that he was a Jew, because that’s just the kind of guy Stimson is.
Ralph Johnstone, flying one of the Wright planes, sets a new altitude record: 9,714 feet. That’s nearly twice as high as the altitude records set in July. Spoiler alert: Johnstone died in a plane crash a couple of weeks later.
In Bristol, Connecticut, two members of the weird-ass Koreshan cult attempted to dig up the grave of Cyrus Teed, who died two years before but had proclaimed that he would rise up as the Messiah. However, before they succeeded, “both were deprived of their reason and died before they could be taken to an asylum.”
There’s a revolution going on in Uruguay.
In a bold move, Henry L. Stimson comes out against child labor to the New York Child Labor Committee.
Yesterday, outrage and disruption prevented French PM Aristide Briand going further in a speech to the French parliament after he said of the railway strike that “Had the actual laws of the country not been sufficient, I would not have hesitated to resort even to illegal measures for the purpose of preserving the fatherland.” Today he denied being a dictator and held up his hands, saying, “Look at these hands – not a drop of blood!” He wins a vote of confidence 329-188.
Front Page Headline of the Day -100: “Sailors in a Battle With a Blue Heron.”
I watched the Jon Stewart rally on C-SPAN, which provided the usual C-SPAN graphics, putting Father Guido Sarducci in quote marks in case we might be fooled, although R2D2 was just identified as R2D2. I skipped over most of the musical numbers, so I kept catching up with the DVR and had to alternate with the French tv series on Carlos the Jackal, which gave my evening a slightly odd vibe.
Signs spotted by me or others: “I didn’t have time to make a better sign.” “Give my false dichotomies or give me death.” “Hitler = Hitler.” “Death to Nobody.” “Look at my ironic hipster sign.” “Having a Sign Makes Me Right.” “I hope today isn’t too windy so my sign doesn’t blow away.” “My Political Views Can't Be Summarized by a Sign.” “Keep it Sane, Stupid [The acrostic of which is kiss].” “I can spell.” And the inevitable marijuana legalization sign as prescribed by law, “Fweedom,” with the “weed” in green. Dude.
In the end, I wasn’t that impressed, because while I support “sanity” in politics, pretty much by definition, I don’t see that as entailing “moderation” in politics, as Jon Stewart seems to. Skepticism is a virtue, but so is enthusiasm and principled activism and Stewart’s largely apolitical notion of politics seems to leave little room for activism and enthusiasm. Or who knows, since his message is mostly about what not to do and very little about how to engage in politics.
I also don’t share his belief that the insanity and violent rhetoric is solely a product of the media and politicians (“If we amplify everything, then we hear nothing”) and that the American people, left to themselves, would be moderate and reasonable and willing to compromise, although I’m sure it would be pretty to think so.
At any rate, we can all agree that Stephen Colbert had the better wardrobe.
(Update: 100 of the best signs – and more in comments – here. H/T to Alert Reader Josh.)
