A moral right

Vladimir Putin says that the United Russia party stands for no political principles and contains many crooks. Imagine what he’d say about it if it weren’t his party. I believe the point he’s making is that the only reason anyone would vote for it is because they want Putin to continue running the country with an iron fist. So, he says, when United Russia, inevitably, wins the elections, he will have a “moral right to hold those in the Duma and the Cabinet responsible for the implementation of the objectives that have been identified so far.” He won’t say at this time exactly how he plans to exercise this moral right, “But various possibilities exist.” For example, he could make himself pope.

Last night, George Bush got into his tux for a White House event for a group called America’s Promise Alliance which runs mentoring programs. At the dinner, he sat between Colin Powell’s wife Alma and American Idol contestant Melinda Doolittle (seen in first picture), and why look, there’s Colin, back at the White House. This calls for a CAPTION CONTEST, wouldn’t you say? If it’s any help, Bush in his remarks said, “And you have helped make real the promise of our Creator -- that there is value and purpose in every single human life.”

Attention, registered non-partisan voters in California

A mailing sent by county registrars of voters in California (I received this today), which seems to have been intended to be sent only to people with permanent absentee voter status, which I’m not, wrongly states that registered non-partisans who wish to vote in the February 5th presidential primaries in the Democratic or American Independent Party (the Supreme Court decided that the political parties are private groups can choose to abide or not abide by the state’s open primaries law, although for some reason the taxpayers still foot the bill for the primary elections for these private groups) have to return the form by November 26. This is only true for absentee ballots, and I’m not even sure (after a discussion with my county registrar’s office) that it’s a hard and fast deadline for that. If you vote in person and are a registered non-partisan, you can decide on election day to request a Dem or AmInd ballot. You can also vote for presidential candidates in those or any other party if you register by January 21. And since the only office being voted on in February is president, you can change your registration again in time for the June primary. (Update: in June 2008, non-partisans can vote in the Democratic or Republican primaries.)

There will also be propositions on the February ballot. And the June ballot. And the November ballot.

(Update: in response to a question in the comments to this post, I have tried to explain our strange Californian voting ways for those who are interested. Reading the explanation is also a completely legal means of achieving a state of mind usually attainable only through the ingestion of certain illegal substances. For my next trick, I will attempt to explain Trumpington’s Variation to the rules of Mornington Crescent.)

Wise policy helps keep us resilient

George Bush fired up his taxpayer-financed airplane today and flew to Indiana for a couple of hours to have lunch and give a speech about fiscal responsibility.

His word of the day: resilient. As in, “we’re a resilient economy.”

How resilient? “Just a few weeks after the terrorist attacks of September the 11th, 2001, our economy was growing. Think about that. After the worst attack on American soil, where nearly 3,000 of our citizens died, this economy recovered. That’s a resilient economy.” And what do we need to maintain this resiliosity? More terrorist attacks? Evidently not. “Wise policy helps keep us resilient; lousy policy will hurt the ability for this economy to grow.” To recap: wise policy is wise, lousy policy is lousy.


AND IN THE TIME MY SPEECHWRITERS SPENT PLAYING WITH THEIR CALCULATORS...: “Over five years, their proposed spending spree adds up to an extra $205 billion. Put another way, that’s about $1,300 in higher spending every second, of every minute, of every hour, of every day, of every year for the next five years. Think about what it means for you. If you’re driving a half hour to visit your grandparents, Congress would have spent an extra $2.3 million. If you attend church for an hour, Congress will tally another $4.7 million. If you watch a football game, Congress would rack up $14 million -- unless, of course, it goes into overtime.” So, as I understand it, we could balance the budget if we just stopped visiting our grandparents, attending church and watching football games.


WHAT WE NEED AND WHAT WE DON’T NEED: “We don’t need members of Congress telling our military commanders what to do. We need our military commanders telling us what to do so we can win the war against these extremists and radicals.” Civilian rule is for sissies; just ask Gen. Musharraf.

MAKING ADVICE: “If you’ve got somebody in harm’s way, you want the President being -- making advice, not -- be given advice by the military, and not making decisions based upon the latest Gallup poll or focus group.”

A SPECIAL GUEST IN OTHER WORDS: “And here’s what [Deputy Secretary of Defense Gordon England] wrote: He said delaying could have this kind of quote -- in other words, what Congress is trying to do -- some in Congress are trying to delay spending this money. ... And here’s what the Deputy Secretary said. He said, it would have ‘a profoundly negative impact on the defense civilian workforce, depot maintenance, base operations, and training activities.’ In other words, there’s a consequence for not funding this money.”

“Congress’s responsibility is clear: It should not go home for the Christmas holidays without giving our troops on the front line the funds they need to succeed.” And maybe an iPod. By the way, how many “Christmas holidays” are there?

Then he returned to the White House and, um, he, um... CAPTION CONTEST!

Not aware of any civilians in the area

In the court martial of an Army sniper – the case in which it came out that there’s something called an Asymmetrical Warfare Group that comes up with brilliant ideas like planting fuses and suchlike and then shooting anyone who picks them up – Staff Sgt Michael Hensley, a member of a sniper team called the Painted Demons, was acquitted on 3 counts of premeditated murder in Iraq but convicted of planting an AK-47 on the corpse of one of the people he shot. And of disrespecting a superior officer. He was sentenced to time served.

Today, US forces in Afghanistan killed 15 men they claimed were militants, plus a woman and two children. With a single grenade, I might add. Military spokesmodel Chris Belcher said, “When militants knowingly engage coalition forces with innocent people in the background, it only shows the extremists’ complete disregard for innocent lives.” Which might be a better excuse if the “engagement” was not, in fact, an American raid. Belcher continued, “on this operation we were not aware of any civilians in the area.” So that’s okay, then.

Tom Tancredo ad. Because some xenophobic dickhead needs to say it:

A course that could lead back to a path of democracy

On ABC this morning, Condi continued to oh so gently scold Musharraf. Actually, scold is far too strong a word. She prefers “counsel” and “encourage.” “Obviously, we are also encouraging that the state of emergency has got to be lifted and lifted as soon as possible.” As soon as possible? That phrase suggests that there is some reason why it is not possible right now, this very instant, and there is no such reason.

George Stephanopoulos pointed out to her that if and when Musharraf is sworn in again as president (he may be delaying this in order not to have to fulfill his promise to step down as army chief), it will be by a purged and supine Supreme Court (insert obligatory Bush v. Gore reference here). Condi responded, “George, this is not a perfect situation.” Oh dear, that puts us in our place for wanting utopia and the rule of, you know, law.

Pakistan, she continues, “is a country that has come a long way from 1999 and the military coup.” Who was behind that coup again, Condi? The “long way” Pakistan has come from the coup of 1999 to the coup of 2007 shows that “the road to democratic development is not smooth and even. ... But if the suggestion is that we somehow now abandon a course that could lead back to a path of democracy for Pakistan, I think that would be mistaken at this point.” Not actual democracy, of course, asking for that would be more of that airy-fairy, head-in-the-clouds perfectionism that adults like Condi are too pragmatic to deal in, but “a path of democracy,” or to be more specific a “course” that “could” lead to “a path of democracy” (Never ask Condi for directions; she’s all “turn left at the tree with the funny branch” and “go right at the empty lot where the Arbie’s used to be”). Because it’s all about the path, the journey, you see, not the destination; it’s very Zen, really, if arbitrary arrests, censorship and abrogation of the rule of law are Zen. And if you kids keep kicking the back of the seat, Gen. Musharraf is going to turn this car right around!

By the way, 3 British reporters were expelled from Pakistan because of an editorial in the Daily Telegraph about the coup which included an expletive – click here to find out which expletive – if you dare! (Second paragraph, first sentence, last word.) Musharraf wants an apology because the word “infringed norms of behaviour.” Mush is very big on the norms of behavior.

The discussion on This Week turned to whether Bush now has the authority to go to war with Iran. Condi: “Look, George, I’m not going to get into a constitutional argument about the President’s authorities. That stands on its own: the President’s authority to use whatever means he needs to use in order to secure the country.” Which of course is exactly what Musharraf claims justifies his seizure of near-absolute power. Funny, that.

I felt I was pretty multilateral

George Bush the Elder, 83 years old, made a spectacular entrance today at the re-dedication of his presidential museum, being sodomized in free fall in mid-air high above College Station, Texas, before the chute opened, if you know what I mean.


Meanwhile, his son was hosting German Chancellor Angela Merkel at his Crawford ranch, now that they’ve gotten that Sarkozy smell out. Today they held a joint press conference, photographed here by the AP in the style of a Mutual of Omaha Wild Kingdom cameraman sneaking up on a couple of gazelles.


At one point, Bush used the only word of German he knows, “Jawohl,” to put her at her ease.

He said that they had “meaningful, strategic discussions.” For example, “The Chancellor and I had a series of discussions on important subjects, starting with a dinner we had last night.” It is unclear if he meant that he had a discussion at dinner, or a discussion about dinner, especially, as we shall see, given how he ended the presser.

He said, “We discussed Iran and our deep desire to solve this important issue diplomatically.” Iran is not an “issue,” it’s a country. Iran is not yet one of those place-names that stand for something else, like Hiroshima, Columbine, Vietnam, or Intercourse, Pennsylvania.


He explained that General Musharraf is an entirely trustworthy fellow: “I take a person for his word until otherwise.” And Mush has indeed given his word, which has always meant so much in the past: “I do want to remind you that he has declared that he’ll take off his uniform, and he has declared there will be elections, which are positive steps.” Naked elections are your answer for everything, aren’t they?


Bush thinks he has detected the source of the problem: “We also believe that suspension of the emergency decree will make it easier for the democracy to flourish.” Ya think?

He explained why “the democracy” in Pakistan isn’t a big deal: “I vowed to the American people we’d keep the pressure on [Al Qaida]. I fully understand we need cooperation to do so, and one country that we need cooperation from is Pakistan. That cooperation has been made easier by the fact that al Qaeda has tried to kill leaders in Pakistan several times.”

Indeed, he thinks the only thing Pakistanis care about is fightin’ Al Qaida: “He [Musharraf] fully understands the dangers of al Qaeda. Benazir Bhutto fully understands the dangers of al Qaeda. By far, the vast majority of people in Pakistan... understand the dangers of al Qaeda.” “And so I believe that we will continue to have good collaboration with the leadership in Pakistan.” Collaboration. What a fine choice of word.

A reporter asked Bush if he is behaving less unilaterally in foreign policy these days: “I felt I was pretty multilateral the first four years of my administration.” I do not think that word means what George thinks it means.

He explained why you may want to pass up that Craigslist job posting: “I want to remind you that if you’re the chief operating officer of al Qaeda, you haven’t had a good experience.” I mean, double-entry bookkeeping is just a joke to those people.

As is always the case when George and Angela get together, things turned a little creepy. And as always, Bush gets in the last word:

PRESIDENT BUSH: I’m now going to go feed the Chancellor a hamburger. (Laughter.) Right here, Crawford, Texas. No, well, I mean back over there. Thank you all.

CHANCELLOR MERKEL: Obviously, for me, as a person who originally came from Hamburg --

PRESIDENT BUSH: Yes.

CHANCELLOR MERKEL: -- it’s even more important.

PRESIDENT BUSH: Hamburger.

God for Harry, England and a packet of crisps

Interesting analysis by the BBC’s Mohammed Hanif of Musharraf’s meandering televised speech last week.

The London Times op-ed editor asks for a new motto for Britain, in six words or less. Some of the replies so far (there are serious ones too, but sod that for a packet of crisps) (I think I just inadvertently coined my own entry):

• “Sorry, is this the queue?”
• “Full service will soon resume.”
• “Yeah, but no, but, yeah.”
• “No, please, after you, honestly.”
• “That’s really most awfully kind.”
• “At least we’re not French.”
• “At least we’re not American.”
• “Americans who missed the boat.”
• “Yer’ve got to larf, aintcha?”
• “Hanging on in quiet desperation.”
• “Britain: it sucks a bit.”
• “Once mighty empire, slightly used.”
• “Mind the gap.”
• “Is Princess Di still dead?”
• “Bond. James Bond.”
• “Fancy a cup of tea?”
• “Come for the Weather, Stay for the Dentistry (and the cooking).”
• “Lie back and think of England.”
• “The game is afoot, Watson!”
• “Don’t mention the war.”
• “I have a cunning plan.”

The last 4 I just made up.

Update: checking back a day later, I find only one new one worth mentioning: “An island in a teacup.”
And I have two more of my own:

“Mrs Peel – we’re needed.”
“Ying tong iddle i po.”

Meta-ish

This humble blog hasn’t been noticed by the right-wing of the blogosphere in a long time, but my post Thursday with all the pictures of Bush and the wounded soldiers has been, and gosh they don’t much like it. We can talk about them here without fear of discovery, by the way, because I notice that when they click over from, say, Jules Crittenden’s blog, not one of them reads anything besides the linked post (zero out of 66 so far), such is their intellectual curiosity. And yet, as is indicated by their comments on that post and in other right-wing blogs, chat groups and whatnot, they think they know from that single post, which mostly consisted of pictures, everything there is to know about me – not just that I’m a sick seditious bastard, a hate-filled moron with no honor who should leave the country, etcetera, but also that I personally know no one in the military, have never met a wounded veteran, am mocking the injured soldiers, and wouldn’t recognize the “You can’t handle the truth” speech from A Few Good Men.

They also insist that Bush really does care. In a previous visit to the same facility in January 2006, Bush happily joked about how he had injuries of his own, a minor scratch on his forehead sustained “in combat with a Cedar.”


The post I wrote at the time would have been a lot angrier, but I only learned later that he had just come from the amputee ward.

In the zone

A Beijing restaurant with an old-style-communist theme (wait staff in People’s Liberation Army uniforms etc) has been ordered by the local commerce bureau to remove a sign saying “liberation zone” pointing to the bathrooms. The bureau called the sign a “malicious satire detrimental to culture.”

By a curious coincidence, I’ve always thought of this blog as both a liberation zone and a malicious satire detrimental to culture. Does that mean this blog is also a bathroom sign?

Unafraid to make moral judgements about the world beyond our borders

Benazir Bhutto is being held under house arrest, but only “for her own security.” So that’s okay, then. (Update: she’s been released.)

Holy Joe Lieberman waxes nostalgic: “The Democratic party I grew up in was unafraid to make moral judgements about the world beyond our borders.” Good times, good times. Democrats today, however, “are viscerally opposed to the use of force – the polar opposite to the self-confident and idealistic nationalism of the party I grew up in.” So idealistic nationalism = the use of force. And how is that different from jingoistic thuggery?

The White House is having its annual Thanksgiving contest, in which the two turkeys to be spared the ax are named by the great American public. The choices offered by the White House this year are less creative than ever: Wing & Prayer, May & Flower, Gobbler & Rafter (Rafter?) (evidently a flock of turkeys is called a rafter), Wish & Bone, Truman & Sixty (the pardon-the-turkey thing was initiated by Truman 60 years ago, when I believe the turkeys were named Hiroshima & Nagasaki), or Jake & Tom. Surely we can do better. I declare this a CONTEST and open with my own entry: Water & Board.

Wherein is revealed the candidate who brings Americans together from all walks of life

Job change of the day: the British minister for defense equipment and support Paul Drayson, 47 (that’s Lord Drayson to the likes of you), resigned in order to compete in the 24 Hours of Le Mans race.

Headline of the day: “Man Punches Trick-or-Treat Boy, 8.” Well, to be fair, that does pretty much constitute a trick, now doesn’t it?

An email from the Giuliani campaign says that “[Pat] Robertson’s endorsement shows that Rudy is the candidate who brings Americans together from all walks of life”. Really? How does it show that? And doesn’t Robertson think that Americans from all walks of life, except the precise one he dictates, are going to hell?

Why is this man smiling? (Updated)

Just yesterday, Bush said (two posts back), “I’ve committed our troops into harm’s way twice, and it’s not a pleasant experience because I understand the consequences firsthand.” Today he went to an army medical facility and met some people who actually do understand the consequences of his decisions firsthand. Warning: graphic pictures of the consequences of Bush’s decisions.












Update: the White House website has five pictures of the visit. One is similar to my second picture above, one is just Bush giving his prepared remarks, and the remaining three are these rather tame pics:




Update to the update: it seems that Bush also played virtual reality games with the recovering soldiers, including a shoot-em-up set in Baghdad. See? He really does appreciate the consequences of war firsthand.

Bush meets Sarkozy: Which basically said, we want to help you survive

Bush was also interviewed by French television.

Asked if Franco-American relations have been changed by Sarkozy replacing Chirac, he explained very carefully, and with OTHER WORDS, that despite both of them being, you know, French and shit, they’re actually different people: “In the sense that every individual matters. In other words, I’ve dealt with a lot of foreign leaders, and some -- and each person brings their own set of personalities and values.” Thank you for that deep psychological insight into the human condition, George.

Sarkozy, he said, is “like me, he wants to solve problems: Here is a problem; let’s go solve it.”

“And I can’t thank President Sarkozy enough for sending the foreign minister to Baghdad, which basically said, we want to help you survive.”

Asked about the imminence of war with Iran: “I don’t know where you’re getting all these rumors -- there must be some weird things going on in Europe these days”. In Europe? Mais non!

But what happens, he is asked, “if the sanctions and the threats do not work”. “I’m not so sure I agree with your hypothesis, that ‘if they don’t work.’ I’m the kind of guy that says, let’s make sure they do work.”

Asked if removing the counter-weight of a strong Iraq didn’t vastly increase Iran’s power, he took a deep hit off his crack-pipe and said, “I think that, ultimately, they’re going to feel pressure about the type of government they have when their people look across the border and see a flourishing, free society.”

Later in the day, he held a press conference with Sarkozy.

He said that he’d finally talked to Musharraf. “And my message was that we believe strongly in elections, and that you ought to have elections soon, and you need to take off your uniform.” As Eli of LeftI points out, he evidently didn’t suggest that Musharraf end martial law, restore the Constitution, the Supreme Court, freedom of the press, release political prisoners, etc etc. Just the naked elections.

Asked by a French reporter about the Iraqi quagmire, Bush once again pulled out his trusty crack-pipe, inhaled deeply, and replied, “I don’t -- you know, ‘quagmire’ is an interesting word.” Adding, “and have you ever looked at your hands, I mean really looked at them?” Okay, what he really said, which is significantly more batshit out-of-his-head-loco, was, “If you lived in Iraq and had lived under a tyranny, you’d be saying, god, I love freedom -- because that’s what’s happened.”

He denied that his threats against Iran are responsible for the price of oil, insisting, “I believe oil prices are going up because the demand for oil outstrips the supply for oil.” He’s an MBA, you know.

Addressing the Iranians, he explained that he was just looking for someone to talk to who isn’t, you know, crazy: “we will work together to try to find if there’s not rational people inside your government who are tired of isolation and who believe there’s a better way forward.”

MAYBE A LITTLE TOO COMFORTABLE: “And so when you ask, am I comfortable with the Sarkozy government sending messages -- you bet I’m comfortable.”

What message is Sarkozy sending here?

Wherein George Bush reveals the lesson of Iraq

Friday, you’ll remember, Dick Cheney referred to Hugo Chavez as leading Peru. Chavez responds that this shows that the US is run by “a bunch of ignorant fools.” And your point is?

French President Sarkozy addresses the US Congress, says, “We love America,” mutters under his breath, “It’s just the damned Americans we detest.”

Bush was interviewed by German television today.

They ask if the “nuclear threat” posed by Iran now, with its complete lack of nuclear weapons, is greater or less than the threat Iraq, with its complete lack of weapons of mass destructed, posed 6 years ago. Bush responded with his characteristic command of verb tenses: “I think they were both dangerous. I think both of them could have been solved diplomatically. ... And I think they’re both dangerous. And I think therefore the lesson of Iraq is that we can work together and solve questions peacefully now.” See, and you didn’t think he’d learned the lesson of Iraq.

“And hopefully we can and hopefully we can keep pressure on the Iranians to say, one, we respect your people; two, we respect your history; but your government is making decisions that are isolating your country.” We can keep pressure on them by respecting their people and history?

Was he serious about the World War III line? “Oh, absolutely serious. I said, if you want to avoid World War III. I didn’t say I’m for World War III.” You didn’t have to say it. “If you want to see World War III, you know, a way to do that is to attack Israel with a nuclear weapon.” How many nuclear weapons would you recommend?

“In other words, I -- I’ve committed our troops into harm’s way twice, and it’s not a pleasant experience because I understand the consequences firsthand.” Well okay, secondhand. Okay, thirdhand... “And so I owe it to the American people to say that I’ve tried to solve this problem diplomatically.” Yes, saying that is the very least you can do.

On Putin: “My hope, of course, is I’ve tried to work with him as best as I can...” As best as you can, that’s the problem. “...to understand the checks and balances. And democracy requires a certain balance in society. And I would hope that he would make decisions that enhanced institutional reform, enhanced the institutions necessary for a free society. As I say, sometimes he listens, sometimes he doesn’t.” Note that by “listens,” he means “does what I tell him to do.” It’s a truly arrogant choice of word.

He is fascinated by the differences between Germany and America. Did you know they speak German instead of American over there? “[T]hat’s an interesting difference between, say, Germany and America. We’ve been attacked. We feel like another attack is coming”. The interviewer reminded him that Germans had some concept of what the fear of being attacked is like, with the Cold War and the Iron Curtain and all.

Asked what his legacy will be: “And that I helped this country protect itself, and at the same time was unashamed, unabashed at spreading certain values to others -- the main one being liberty, whether it be the freedom from forms of government or the freedom from disease and hunger.” Freedom from forms of government? I knew he was secretly an anarchist, I knew it.

And maybe a book of Mormon too

Campaigning at a Christian adoption agency across the street from Bob Jones University, Mitt Romney said he wants to require clinics to provide information on adoption to women who are there for abortions, whether they want it or not. He also wants to require all adoption agencies to offer information on abortions.

Just kidding.

Eating product

Today Bush held a White House Forum on International Trade and Investment. I won’t leave you in suspense: he’s in favor of it. “We want people eating product grown here in the United States of America. That’s what we want.” I wish he wouldn’t speak so appetizingly; I have to skip product lunch today.

UNDERSTAND? “As I understand it, you understand how trade benefits this nation. ... You understand what I understand: Free and fair trade means higher paying jobs for American workers.”

HE’S THE UNDERSTANDER: “When a job goes overseas, some family hurts in America, and I understand that.”


He pushed for passage of various trade agreements. And remember, Congress, if you’re not with us, you’re with the false populists: “Champions of false populism in the region are watching Congress -- they will use any failure to approve these trade agreements as evidence that America will never treat democracies in the region as full partners.” (If it’s not clear, Hugo Chavez is the “false populist.”)

HE’S GOT AN MBA, YOU KNOW: “And when people compete for the dollar, it means somebody is going to get a better price.”

Take into account their society and where they live

Last month I mentioned a lawsuit by some workers on a Dole banana plantation in Nicaragua sterilized by a Dow Chemical pesticide (which it seems Dow tried to pull from the market because of its dangerousness, but Dole threatened to sue Dow for breach of contract). Six of the workers won their case in a Los Angeles court. They’ve been awarded an initial $3.2 million, with more to come if the jury believes that Dole acted maliciously when it, for example, decided that informing workers about the pesticide in their own language was “not operationally feasible and does not need to be implemented.” A lawyer for Dow tried to tell the jurors (before the judge stopped him) that Nicaraguans deserve lower compensation for sterilization because they are of less value than members of other nationalities, suggesting the jurors “take into account their society and where they live,” assessing damages “in the context of their world and their society.”

Speaking of agribusiness, here is another convincing, to me at least, George Monbiot article on how “Biofuels could kill more people than the Iraq war.”

So there was no Daily Show tonight because the writers are striking against not being paid when the news satire they write is accessed on new media like a computer screen, just as if they were lowly, lowly bloggers.

We would hope he wouldn’t have declared the emergency powers he declared

Today Bush met with Turkish Prime Minister Tayyip Erdogan.

Bush’s word of the day was “people”: “In order to chase down people [PKK] who murder people [non-PKK, I assume] you need good intelligence.” “people [PKK] who are using murder as a weapon to achieve political objectives”. “he has constantly talked to my government about seeing if we can’t work together to get these people [Turkish soldiers captured by the PKK] released. And the point I bring up is that there is at least one effective measure for people in Turkey [I believe “Turks” is the word you’re looking for, George] to see that when we work together we can accomplish important objectives.” “We need to know where people [PKK, the hidden ones] are hiding.” “I’ve assured the Prime Minister that we’re working very carefully and closely with people in the Kurdish part of Iraq [Kurds?] to help deal with the movement of these people [PKK, the moving ones]”.

Bush also made good use of the word hypothetical to avoid answering questions. How would he react to a Turkish incursion into Iraq? “I don’t like to answer hypothetical questions.” And if Musharraf refuses to do what Bush asks (but not in person; Bush still hasn’t talked to Mush), will he cut US aid to Pakistan? “Once again, it’s a hypothetical question.”

Why does he so hate to talk hypothetically? He’s just not very good with verb tenses. “Previous to his decision we made it clear that these emergency measures were -- would undermine democracy.” “As I said earlier in my statement, that we made it clear to the President that we would hope he wouldn’t have declared the emergency powers he declared.” Phfew.


Y’ALL HURRY BACK NOW: “Now that he’s made that decision, I hope now that he hurry back to elections.” As I said, not so good with the verb tenses.

He does offer one great prospect for the Pakistani people: naked elections: “we expect there to be elections as soon as possible, and that the President should remove his military uniform.”

Here’s as close as he came to answering the question about cutting aid to Pakistan: “I certainly hope he does take my advice... And so that’s -- all we can do is continue to work with the President, as well as others in the Pak government, to make it abundantly clear the position of the United States. And then obviously we’ll deal with it if something other than that happens.”

Much of the talk with Erdogan was of course about the PKK. Bush repeatedly talked about the need to share intelligence, which... oh, insert your own joke here, it’s just too easy.

Erdogan doubtless recognized all this intel joke as a stall. “But what we did talk about is to make sure that there is good enough intelligence so that we can help deal with a common problem... And we need to know, in any of these actions, who they are and where they are, in order to make any strategy effective. And therefore, step one is to make sure that our intelligence-sharing is good. The problem oftentimes is that faulty intelligence means that we can’t solve the problem.” So what do we need, oh pointy-haired Dilbert boss? “Good, sound intelligence delivered on a real-time basis, using modern technology”.

NO, REALLY, HIS ACTUAL JOB TITLE IS “NUMBER MAN”: “I have set up a tripartite arrangement, for his number two man in the military to stay in touch with our number man and General Petraeus.”

He also discussed with Erdogan some of the other issues there am between the US and Turkey: “We understand there’s transit issues in airports; we understand that there is issues with money.”

They have to be dealt with

Pakistan’s irony information minister, justifying the crackdown on anti-coup protesters: “If people take the law into their [own] hands, obviously, they have to be dealt with”.


Actually, a minister of irony would be a great idea.

Of truffles, waterboarding and the dastardly Pakistani military

My favorite new crime: highway truffle robbery. Dennis Moore, Dennis Moore, riding through the land...

Arlen Specter will also vote for Mukasey. No surprise there, huh? Says Mukasey assured him privately that if there were a law against waterboarding, Bush would have to abide by it. So clearly that law should be passed – and signed into law – before the confirmation process goes any further.

State Dept Legal Advisor John Bellinger also refuses to rule out waterboarding. Indeed, it’s okay by him if foreign secret services use it on Americans.

Pakistan’s military has usually defended its coups as necessary to fight corruption or chaos or corruption of their precious bodily fluids or whatever, but Mush’s latest coup is clearly about nothing other than his own personal grip on power. The reputation of the military cannot but suffer from being associated with it. Yet I haven’t heard of any dissent at all within the military’s ranks, any reluctance to follow Musharraf’s orders.

By the way, I’ve created a new label for posts about Musharraf, dating back to 1999. Somewhere along the way, the usual spelling of his name gained an R.