Today -100: November 3, 1910: Of slupskies, political scamps, drop kickers, and dummies

Name of the Day -100: a St. Louis former Republican Party ward boss and famous “character” has bet that he can drink 20 pints of beer every day for 30 days. He says he has a “system” for managing all that beer, and that he will win or die in the attempt. Oh yes, his name: Abe Slupsky. Almost an onomatopoeia.

NY Democratic gubernatorial candidate John A. Dix gives his only major election speech in the city of New York, at Carnegie Hall. The NYT notes that many women were present in the audience. Mayor Gaynor was unable to make a speech (having been shot in the throat in August), but he did send a letter of endorsement alluding to the Republicans’ alliance with “political scamps,” which everyone understood to mean William Randolph Hearst. Dix pretty much ignored Stimson in his speech and directed his attacks to Roosevelt, calling him “the apostle of tumult and the protagonist of misrepresentation,” an “instigator of panic” and the “destructive agent of business depression.” He also referred to TR’s “inordinate vanity,” “dangerous ambition,” “reckless conduct,” and lack of dignity and self-respect. I guess that pretty much covers it.

Dix’s speech was interrupted by a suffragist, Maud Malone, who was ejected. What she said, the NYT didn’t report.

I misread the headline “Drop Kickers at Harvard” as “Drop Knickers at Harvard.” I don’t know if that says something about me, about 1910, about Harvard, or possibly about all three.

Headline of the Day -100: “Jersey Poll Lists Full of Dummies.” They said it, not me.

Election 2010 – The Enstupiding

First, fuck you Wisconsin and the cheese you rode in on.

Second, I lost. Well, Christine O’Donnell lost, but she’s me.

This morning I received a phone call from Susan Sarandon telling me to vote for Prop. 19 (marijuana legalization). Naturally, I do anything Susan Sarandon tells me to do (since the lemon juice scene in Atlantic City).

Lexington, Kentucky elects an openly gay mayor, Jim Gray. As far as I know, it wasn’t even an issue, as opposed to the 2004 US Senate race in Kentucky, where Jim Bunning’s proxies made unsubtle suggestions that the D. candidate, Daniel Mongiardo, was gay – the state senate president called him “a limp wrist” – and Mongiardo responded by trumpeting his hatred of teh gay. Mongiardo, who has since married – a woman – ran again this year but lost the D. primary to Jack Conway, who just lost to idiot Rand Paul.

Since Roland Burris was an appointee, his replacement takes office not in January but as soon as the Ill. election is certified, at which point there will be no black senators.

On the other hand, Tim Scott (from South Carolina) will be the first black Republican congresscritter since J.C. Watts left in 2003. Scott beat Strom Thurmond’s son in the primary.

Oklahoma, where the wind, as I understand it, comes sweepin’ down the plain, but not from Mecca, bans sharia law. In fact, State Question 755 (the “SOS Amendment”) bans the use by OK courts of any international law, so it might not be as irrelevant to the real world as it’s generally been portrayed.

Daily Telegraphy, and the return of bunga bunga

News from the Daily Telegraph: a 10-year-old gives birth in Spain.

“Sicilian Bandit King’s Skeleton Is Too Short” (Salvatore Giuliano, supposedly killed and buried in 1949, evidently faked his death).

“Harry Potter Blamed for India’s Disappearing Owls” (for children’s parties and, sigh, sacrifices).

And I’ve been remiss in not mentioning Silvio Berlusconi’s latest scandal, intervening to get a 17-year-old illegal immigrant Moroccan bellydancer (and not a prostitute at all, she says) who goes by the nom de bellydance “Ruby” released from police custody after she was arrested for theft. He told the cops she was the granddaughter of Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak. She is not. Evidently she and the PM met at a “bunga bunga” party, which refers either to some sort of sex act (possibly imparted to Silvio by Qadafi)(!) or to a dirty joke, evidently involving a pair of his political enemies and the sexual practices of a tribe of African cannibals. I’d hoped to find the exact sex act/joke before posting, but we can’t have everything.

This is the second time the term “bunga bunga” has appeared in this blog; the last time it was uttered by Virginia Woolf and friends in a rather different context.

Ruby (who says she never had sex with Berlusconi) is writing a book.

Berlusconi says, “I have a gruelling work schedule and if I happen to look pretty girls in the face now and then, it’s better to be passionate about beautiful women than to be gay.” She’s 17 years old. He’s 73.

And, not surprisingly, Berlusconi’s package catches on fire.

Vote early

and vote awful.

Today -100: November 2, 1910: Of rumors, betting, clubwomen, and trains

There is a rumor of a revolution in Spain.

A false rumor.

Speaking of false rumors, a false rumor that Jews ritually killed a Muslim girl sets off a pogrom in the Jewish quarter of Shiraz in Persia. 12 Jews were killed and every house in the quarter was systematically looted.

In the absence of opinion polling, the NYT keeps reporting on wagering. For example, a week before the election, Dix is favored 3:1 over Stimson.

In Chicago, “Mounted police today charged mobs of striking garment workers and made numerous arrests, only to be dumfounded when met by groups of clubwomen and society leaders, who, when arrested, produced calling cards in lieu of bail bonds. It was a new experience for the police, and it plainly confused them. ...Most of the clubwomen... were garbed as working girls and the police could not distinguish them from strikers until after arrests were made.” It must indeed have been very confusing for the cops not to know who it was permissible to beat and arrest. For example, one clubwoman was, um, clubbed. The NYT keeps using the word “riot” but never describes any behaviour that would justify the term.

In the year ending June 30, 1910, 3,804 people were killed in the US in railroad accidents and 82,374 injured. There were 5,861 collisions and 5,910 derailments.

Today -100: November 1, 1910: Of alliances of crooked politicians and crooked business, and flying high

In a campaign speech for Henry L. Stimson, Teddy Roosevelt says “we stand against the worst alliance of crooked politicians and crooked business that this state has seen, or this city has seen, since the days of Tweed.”

At a Stimson campaign rally in the Grand Music Hall in NYC, the man introducing him noted that when Stimson was a US District Attorney he hired Felix Frankfurter out of Harvard, even after Frankfurter explained that he was a Jew, because that’s just the kind of guy Stimson is.

Ralph Johnstone, flying one of the Wright planes, sets a new altitude record: 9,714 feet. That’s nearly twice as high as the altitude records set in July. Spoiler alert: Johnstone died in a plane crash a couple of weeks later.

Today -100: October 31, 1910: Of resurrections, revolutions, child labor, bloodless hands, and heron battles

In Bristol, Connecticut, two members of the weird-ass Koreshan cult attempted to dig up the grave of Cyrus Teed, who died two years before but had proclaimed that he would rise up as the Messiah. However, before they succeeded, “both were deprived of their reason and died before they could be taken to an asylum.”

There’s a revolution going on in Uruguay.

In a bold move, Henry L. Stimson comes out against child labor to the New York Child Labor Committee.

Yesterday, outrage and disruption prevented French PM Aristide Briand going further in a speech to the French parliament after he said of the railway strike that “Had the actual laws of the country not been sufficient, I would not have hesitated to resort even to illegal measures for the purpose of preserving the fatherland.” Today he denied being a dictator and held up his hands, saying, “Look at these hands – not a drop of blood!” He wins a vote of confidence 329-188.

Front Page Headline of the Day -100: “Sailors in a Battle With a Blue Heron.”

So now that sanity’s restored, what’s next?

I watched the Jon Stewart rally on C-SPAN, which provided the usual C-SPAN graphics, putting Father Guido Sarducci in quote marks in case we might be fooled, although R2D2 was just identified as R2D2. I skipped over most of the musical numbers, so I kept catching up with the DVR and had to alternate with the French tv series on Carlos the Jackal, which gave my evening a slightly odd vibe.

Signs spotted by me or others: “I didn’t have time to make a better sign.” “Give my false dichotomies or give me death.” “Hitler = Hitler.” “Death to Nobody.” “Look at my ironic hipster sign.” “Having a Sign Makes Me Right.” “I hope today isn’t too windy so my sign doesn’t blow away.” “My Political Views Can't Be Summarized by a Sign.” “Keep it Sane, Stupid [The acrostic of which is kiss].” “I can spell.” And the inevitable marijuana legalization sign as prescribed by law, “Fweedom,” with the “weed” in green. Dude.

In the end, I wasn’t that impressed, because while I support “sanity” in politics, pretty much by definition, I don’t see that as entailing “moderation” in politics, as Jon Stewart seems to. Skepticism is a virtue, but so is enthusiasm and principled activism and Stewart’s largely apolitical notion of politics seems to leave little room for activism and enthusiasm. Or who knows, since his message is mostly about what not to do and very little about how to engage in politics.

I also don’t share his belief that the insanity and violent rhetoric is solely a product of the media and politicians (“If we amplify everything, then we hear nothing”) and that the American people, left to themselves, would be moderate and reasonable and willing to compromise, although I’m sure it would be pretty to think so.

At any rate, we can all agree that Stephen Colbert had the better wardrobe.



(Update: 100 of the best signs – and more in comments – here. H/T to Alert Reader Josh.)

Today -100: October 30, 1910: Of campaign speeches, women voting, rubber bands, and lively Cocks

Henry L. Stimson “endeared himself instantly to a crowd of 1,000 people this afternoon on the railway platform at Saratoga” by making these remarks in a campaign speech: “Look out for the engine behind you! Look out!”

The Ladies’ Home Journal investigates what effects women’s suffrage has had in Colorado and Utah. The (male) investigator finds that child-labor laws are no better than in other states, that prostitution has not been wiped out, and that the women in Denver are bigger drinkers even than those in New York, Chicago or San Francisco. “Even some of the drug stores in Denver, according to good authority, serve whiskey and brandy to unescorted girls.” And women voters in Denver are also just as susceptible to bribery as the men.

So really, what’s the point in letting the little ladies vote?

English aviator Claude Grahame-White sets an air speed record, 60 mph, at a meet on Long Island. But the real hero, by which I mean idiot, of the day was J.B. Moisant, who entered the contest in a plane that wasn’t fully rebuilt after an accident (the rubber band that worked the controls was missing) (I’m not making that up). He took second place (and died in a plane crash in December).

Headline of the Day -100: “Littleton Making It Lively for Cocks.” Martin Littleton, running against Congressman William W. Cocks.

Today -100: October 29, 1910: Of warplanes, dubious attitudes towards matrimony, sugar trusts, Bourbons, and insane brides

Secretary of War Dickinson, in France, is rumored to be negotiating to purchase 10 airplanes for the army.

The NYT thinks Francis McGovern shouldn’t have promised to get married if elected governor of Wisconsin. For a start, “The women of Wisconsin will generally consider his attitude towards matrimony as dubious.” Fair enough.

Henry L. Stimson says the Sugar Trust is trying to defeat him.

Roosevelt calls the Democratic candidate for governor of Connecticut, former CT Supreme Court Justice Simeon Eben Baldwin (mandatorily retired at 70), retrogressive, reactionary and Bourbon because he ruled that the federal workmen’s compensation law was unconstitutional because it interferes with their liberty of contract. However, what TR doesn’t mention is that Baldwin supports a workmen’s compensation law in CT to change that legal doctrine.

Headline of the Day -100: “Bride Insane at the Altar.”

Today -100: October 28, 1910: Of undesirable aliens and election promises

The Commissioner of Immigration at Angel Island in San Francisco is suspended because of complaints from the Asiatic Exclusion League and others that he was allowing in too many Chinese, Japanese, Hindus and other “undesirables.”

Francis McGovern, Republican candidate for governor of Wisconsin, promises that if elected, he will get married, although he has no one in mind. He was elected and served two terms as governor but none as a husband. (Thanks to the Wisconsin Historical Society for research assistance.)

Today -100: October 27, 1910: Of messing with Texas, literacy tests, and repeating Dix

The New Mexico Constitutional Convention increases the amount of land it wants from Texas to 600,000 acres.

The Taft administration, under criticism for not having given a fraction the patronage to blacks that Roosevelt did, has been looking around rather explicitly for a token to promote. It now announces that it will appoint William H. Lewis assistant attorney general, the highest post a negro has ever held in the federal government. Wikipedia informs us that Lewis (1868-1949) was also the first black man ever to play college football, for Amherst and Harvard, where he coached for 11 years (which seems an odd use to make of a degree from Harvard Law School), and the first black member of the American Bar Association, where there was a strong move to expel him when his race was discovered. Southern senators will delay his confirmation until next June.

The NYT continues its laser-like focus on negro voting rights, giving an astonishing 90 words (many of them inaccurate or misleading) to the story that the Oklahoma Supreme Court ruled constitutional both the “grandfather clause” for the new literacy test and the special voting procedure adopted for the referendum in which all votes not cast against the measure were counted as being for it (voters had to scratch out the words “for the amendment” with a pencil, which was not provided in every polling station).

TR says that Dix is being supported by men who “wish to employ children in their business for unlimited hours.”

A Henry L. Stimson campaign rally in Rochester is marred by “continuous interruption by eight or ten indignant and somewhat intoxicated men, who kept repeating the name of Dix.” Er, are you sure it was a name they were repeating?

Full of rage

A forensic psychiatrist hired by the Pentagon says that Omar Khadr, who has been held in Gulag Guantanamo since he was 15, is... wait for it... “full of rage.” Evidently, “He is very angry about being in custody.” Dr. Welner has a degree in duh from the University of Miami.

The camera always adds 10 pounds of fascism

Rand Paul’s designated head-stomper Tim Profitt says “the camera angle made the scuffle Monday night appear worse that it was.... and I apologize if it appeared overly forceful”.

It’s all about the camera angles.

This trial we call show (addendum)

The Omar Khadr plea deal was more shameful than I realized: it requires him to give up his right to sue the US for any abuse at Guantanamo (and for being illegally detained without trial in the first place).

Today -100: October 26, 1910: Trust issues

TR has been attacking Dem. gubernatorial candidate for NY John A. Dix with dubious claims of a connection to the defunct wallpaper trust. Dix now attacks his opponent, Henry Stimson, for gathering evidence against the sugar trust while employed as a federal D.A., then resigning and taking a large fee ($27,000, as opposed to the $12,000 a year he made as a D.A.) for prosecuting the trust as a special prosecutor.

French PM Briand claims that arrested leaders of the railway strike have confessed that it was all a plot to ruin France by violence, anarchy and civil war.

Telegraphing punchlines

More stories from the Daily Telegraph.

Officials in Toulouse are using computers to email the satnav positions and photographs of dogshit to street cleaners. Or as we in the Blogger-American Community call it, “linking to Drudge.” Says a town council spokesmodel: “no one can now say we are not on top of the problem.” So let no one now say that they are not on top of the pooh.

Daily Telegraph Headline of the Day: “‘Hiccup Girl’ Charged with Murder in Florida.” Evidently, she achieved fame at 16 in 2007 because of her non-stop hiccups, appearing on the Today Show, where she was hugged by Keith Urban (which sounds like a euphemism for something, but evidently isn’t). Naturally, her life went bad after the hiccupping and the celebrity ended. She ran away from home, fell in with the wrong crowd, and they robbed and killed a guy.

Prostitutes who walk the streets by a highway in Spain have been told to wear reflective vests or face a 40 fine. Health and safety, you know.

This trial we call show

After eight years of being held without trial, mistreated, and facing a kangaroo court, child soldier Omar Khadr pleads guilty. The judge advises him, with what degree of irony we do not know, “You should only do this if you truly believe it is in your best interests.” Note that the judge did not say he should plead guilty only if he is in fact guilty. Because that really has nothing to do with anything.

We do not go to those areas

Philippines politics. You wouldn’t think an article whose opening paragraph talks about “local candidates who had gathered to sign an agreement promising not to kill one another in the final days of campaigning before local elections” could be accused of burying the lead, but then there’s this 10 paragraphs later:

“Over there, that’s MILF territory,” Arevalo said, pointing to his left. “We’re talking by the thousands. They’re just one kilometer away. We do not go to those areas.”

Today -100: October 25, 1910: Of negative campaigning

Yesterday the Times was suggesting that Rep. John Tener, the Republican candidate for governor of Pennsylvania, would drop out. But instead, Tener today swears out a warrant for the arrest of the president of the newspaper North American, which printed that Tener is “a friend and associate of swindlers.” Tener is connected with the National Public Utilities Corporation, which may or may not be a scam. Spoiler alert: Tener will win the election. He was, I think, the first successful professional-athlete-turned-politician (baseball) .

The NYT says Roosevelt knows he is lying when he accuses Dem. gubernatorial candidate for NY John A. Dix involvement with the old wallpaper trust. Dix became a director in a wallpaper company in 1907 but the trust effectively ceased to exist years before. TR is claiming that the trust still existed because it was appealing the initial ruling, which was in a case brought by the Continental Wall Paper Company, the trust, against someone who had not paid for wallpaper. That ruling was that the company was an illegal combination and its contracts were therefore unenforceable.

TR, on a roll, also attacked Eugene Foss, the Dem. candidate for Massachusetts governor, as “a man who has made his money in speculation.”