Today -100: October 1, 1912: Of Balkan wars, perfume, and fake lynch mobs

Bulgaria, Serbia and Greece are mobilizing their armies.

Latest fad in Paris: injecting perfume.

I mentioned that the US gave Mexico permission for some of its troops to travel through American soil to fight rebels. Texas Gov. Colquitt was asked to give his permission too and he did, but has changed his mind, though too late to do any good (especially since he sent his message to the departments of State and War on a Friday, and they are closed for the weekend).

The sheriff of Kenosha County, Wisconsin stages a fake lynching in which a fake mob pretends to overpower the sheriff and puts a noose around the neck of a black prisoner to coerce him into confessing to stealing a gun. It worked.

Want to know what William Howard Taft sounded like? The Library of Congress has two brief recordings dated today -100.

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What, you got something better to do?

On Fox News Sunday, Paul Ryan refused to explain which tax loopholes he’d close, because it would be very time-consuming, with the time and the math and the counting on his fingers and toes.

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Today -100: September 30, 1912: Of non-lynchings, red flags, Balkan wars, and kid gloves

A mob is thwarted from lynching Hugh Long, the mayor of Wagener, South Carolina and state representative-elect, after he shot and killed one Pickens N. Gunter, president of the Bank of Wagener, over their political differences. (Long will be acquitted next June).

Police in Lawrence, Massachusetts attack an IWW parade, essentially because they had red flags.

Russia is mobilizing seven army corps, as a precaution in case it gets involved in the increasingly likely war in the Balkans. Bulgaria, Serbia, Montenegro and Greece have all been issuing threats against the Ottoman Empire.

Socialist presidential candidate Eugene Debs holds a rally in Madison Square Garden. The NYT says the audience was equally divided by gender. Debs calls Woodrow Wilson “the kid glove on the paw of the Tammany tiger.” He notes that Taft, Roosevelt and Wilson have never had to look for a job, never been on strike, been slugged by a capitalistic policeman, been in jail, or produced enough to feed a gallanipper (mosquito).

Woodrow Wilson demands that the upcoming New York Democratic Convention not be run by Boss Murphy (Wilson’s been trying to force Gov. John Dix, Murphy’s man, out of office).

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Today -100: September 29, 1912: Of covenants, the typical Englishman of the year 3912, non-thinking people, and bears

Northern Irish Protestants sign the Covenant, pledging to resist Home Rule and never recognize the authority of an Irish Parliament, “in sure confidence that God will defend the right.”

A Dr. Forbes Ross suggests that with the current eugenic trends in England, 2,000 years from now the average Englishman’s face will be that of a typical criminal, with prognathous jaws and face, receding forehead, broad, flat nose, well-marked canine teeth, small eyes, short neck, head set well back between the shoulders, and a depraved gorilla countenance.


Taft attacks Roosevelt, though not by name, saying the Bull Moose Party split off from the Republican Party “not for any one principle, or indeed on any principle at all, but merely to gratify personal ambition and vengeance, and in the gratification of that personal ambition and vengeance, every new fad and theory, some of them good, some of them utterly preposterous and impracticable, some of them as Socialistic as anything that has been proposed in the countries of Europe... have been crowded into a platform in order to tempt the voters of enthusiastic supporters of each of these proposed reforms. ... an entire willingness to destroy every limitation of constitutional representative government in order that, by short cuts, these various reforms... may be accomplished by the decree of a benevolent despotism to be supported by the acclaim of hero-worshiping, emotional, undiscriminating, superficially minded, and non-thinking people.” Adding, probably, “But if superficially minded, non-thinking people want to vote for me instead, that’s cool.” Seriously, is that how you try to win back disaffected Republican voters? The rest of the speech was about the need to preserve the protective tariff.

An engineer, Carroll Livingston Riker, has written a book (which astonishingly seems to have been republished this year) proposing the building of a wall into the Atlantic from Newfoundland to redirect the Gulf Stream to the Arctic, melting the Polar ice caps and heating up the Earth, and all for only $190 million, less than the cost of building the Panama Canal.

Headline of the Day -100 (LA Times): “Kaiser Throws Carrot To Bear.”

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Today -100: September 28, 1912: Of insurrections

Roosevelt is campaigning in the South (Louisiana today, Tennessee yesterday), which he knows will never vote for anyone but a Democrat.

Evidently Augusta, Georgia is in a state of “insurrection.” Ah, that means that locals were a tad upset about National Guard shooting at striking trolley workers, killing one.

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Today -100: September 27, 1912: Of very delightful meetings

William Howard Taft and Woodrow Wilson meet at the Copley Plaza Hotel, Boston, the only time their paths will cross during the campaign. Wilson said afterward, “It was a very delightful meeting. I am very fond of President Taft.” They exchanged pleasantries about how their voices were holding out. The NYT notes that an hour before the two met, Wilson made a speech declaring Taft totally ineffectual. Oddly enough, Wilson had spent the previous night at the Taft Hotel in New Haven, in a bed specially made for President Taft.

Joseph Smith, president of the Mormon Church, endorses Taft (I think because he didn’t invade Mexico, endangering the future status of the Mormon polygamist colonies there). So that’s one state in the bag. One more state, and he’ll have two.

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Another caption contest (aka, a leftover picture I can’t think of anything to do with)

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Zombie-Eyed Granny Hunting (or, be vewwy, vewwy quiet, I’m hunting interns)

Caption contest:

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Today -100: September 26, 1912: Of aroused judges, and tea

Headline of the Day -100: “Divorce Judge Aroused.”

Mary Wood, President of the Pasaic, NJ branch of the Equal Suffrage League, resigns, saying the members do nothing but drink tea.

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Obama at the United Nations: There’s no video that justifies an attack on an embassy

Obama spoke this morning to the UN General Assembly (otherwise known as the bit of the UN that doesn’t count because France doesn’t have a veto in it).

HE WAS A STEEL-DRIVING MAN: “Mr. President, Mr. Secretary General, fellow delegates, ladies and gentleman: I would like to begin today by telling you about an American named Chris Stevens.”

IT’S JUST ALWAYS ALL ABOUT US, ISN’T IT? “The attacks on the civilians in Benghazi were attacks on America.”

SO IT’LL JUST BE CANADA AND MONACO? “Today, we must declare that this violence and intolerance has no place among our United Nations.”

Then he talks about the Arab Spring. “the world has been captivated by the transformation that’s taken place, and the United States has supported the forces of change,” adding, “except for, you know, Bahrain. Oh, and the Saudis, and, um...”

IT’S JUST ALWAYS ALL ABOUT US, ISN’T IT? “We were inspired by the Tunisian protests that toppled a dictator, because we recognized our own beliefs in the aspiration of men and women who took to the streets.”

AND BY ULTIMATELY, I MEAN AFTER DECADES OF BEING ON THE OTHER SIDE: “We insisted on change in Egypt, because our support for democracy ultimately put us on the side of the people.”

THE UNITED STATES IS ALWAYS GOOD AT TELLING EXACTLY WHEN THE INTERESTS OF THE PEOPLE STOP BEING SERVED BY A CORRUPT STATUS QUO: “We supported a transition of leadership in Yemen, because the interests of the people were no longer being served by a corrupt status quo.”

WELL, ASPIRATIONS AND AIR STRIKES: “We intervened in Libya alongside a broad coalition, and with the mandate of the United Nations Security Council, because we had the ability to stop the slaughter of innocents, and because we believed that the aspirations of the people were more powerful than a tyrant.”

OR TO TAKE THAT SECOND CRULLER: “Those in power have to resist the temptation to crack down on dissidents.”

LOOKIN’ AT YOU, ROMNEY: “In hard economic times, countries must be tempted -- may be tempted to rally the people around perceived enemies, at home and abroad, rather than focusing on the painstaking work of reform.”

It occurs to me that while he once again castigates the “crude and disgusting video” whose “message must be rejected by all who respect our common humanity,” at no point has he ever specified what problems he has with the film. What do you find so disgusting, Barack? The acting? The portrayal of Mohammed? Or are you simply outsourcing your disgust – Muslims claim to find it disgusting, therefore in solidarity we all have to?

In the next paragraph, he notes that he himself is a Christian, because of course he did. But we don’t have blasphemy laws protecting the sensibilities of Christians. And “As President of our country and Commander-in-Chief of our military, I accept that people are going to call me awful things every day -- (laughter) -- and I will always defend their right to do so.” Oh good, he just implicitly compared himself to Mohammed; that’ll go down well.

He goes on for a bit with a boilerplate defense of free speech – okay, but not particularly inspired – then uses a word, well let’s see if you spot the problematic word: “We do so because given the power of faith in our lives, and the passion that religious differences can inflame, the strongest weapon against hateful speech is not repression; it is more speech -- the voices of tolerance that rally against bigotry and blasphemy, and lift up the values of understanding and mutual respect.” The word, of course, is blasphemy, which does not belong in any proper defense of free speech.

ON THIS WE MUST AGREE (BUT DON’T): “And on this we must agree: There is no speech that justifies mindless violence. There are no words that excuse the killing of innocents. There’s no video that justifies an attack on an embassy.” Mindless violence? It’s precisely the minds behind the violence that’s the problem.

BUT SOMEONE IS WRONG ON THE INTERNET: “In this modern world with modern technologies, for us to respond in that way to hateful speech empowers any individual who engages in such speech to create chaos around the world. We empower the worst of us if that’s how we respond.”

AND BY “BE CLEAR,” I MEAN “LIE LIKE A WEASEL”: “Now, let me be clear: Just as we cannot solve every problem in the world, the United States has not and will not seek to dictate the outcome of democratic transitions abroad.”

AND HERE’S THE PART WHERE HE TAKES BACK WHAT HE JUST SAID ABOUT FREE SPEECH: “It is time to marginalize those who -- even when not directly resorting to violence -- use hatred of America, or the West, or Israel, as the central organizing principle of politics. For that only gives cover, and sometimes makes an excuse, for those who do resort to violence.” So Mr. Free Speech wants to suppress speech that “gives cover” or provides an excuse for violence. And I’m not sure what “marginalize” is supposed to mean, although I can guess, but the assumption behind the word is that the majority have the right to decide what sort of speech is acceptable.

UNLESS YOU COUNT FLAG RECOGNITION 101: “Burning an American flag does nothing to provide a child an education.”

UNLESS YOU COUNT WINDOW REPAIRERS: “Attacking an embassy won’t create a single job.”

FIRST THEY CAME FOR THE GREAT SATAN....The impulse towards intolerance and violence may initially be focused on the West, but over time it cannot be contained.”

He says of “extremists,” “They don’t build; they only destroy.” You didn’t build that!

OH GOOD, I WAS HOPING SOMEONE WOULD TELL ME WHEN IT WAS TIME FOR THAT: “It is time to leave the call of violence and the politics of division behind.”

GUANTANAMO? “On so many issues, we face a choice between the promise of the future, or the prisons of the past.”

WHEREIN OBAMA TELLS MUSLIMS HOW TO BE CREDIBLE: “The future must not belong to those who slander the prophet of Islam. But to be credible, those who condemn that slander must also condemn the hate we see in the images of Jesus Christ that are desecrated, or churches that are destroyed, or the Holocaust that is denied.” That sentence is weird, right?

WALK, NO, WADDLE, YES: “Understanding that such a [Middle East] peace must come through a just agreement between the parties, America will walk alongside all who are prepared to make that journey.”

REALLY? HAVE YOU CHECKED WITH STEPHEN HAWKING? On Iran’s nuclear program: “But that time is not unlimited.”

WHAT WE RESPECT: “We respect the right of nations to access peaceful nuclear power, but one of the purposes of the United Nations is to see that we harness that power for peace. And make no mistake....”

Whenever a president or candidate says "Make no mistake," I go out & make 22 mistakes on purpose.

— rob delaney (@robdelaney) September 25, 2012

“...a nuclear-armed Iran is not a challenge that can be contained. It would threaten the elimination of Israel...” Or would if Israel didn’t have several hundred nukes. “...It risks triggering a nuclear-arms race in the region, and the unraveling of the non-proliferation treaty.” The one Israel didn’t sign.

HAS ANYONE TOLD THE IRAQIS? “The war in Iraq is over. American troops have come home.” Well, been transferred to Afghanistan. “We’ve begun a transition in Afghanistan, and America and our allies will end our war on schedule in 2014.” It says so right here on Google Calendar.

SO THERE’VE BEEN NO MORE THAN SIX ANGRY MOBS??? “for every angry mob that gets shown on television, there are billions around the world who share similar hopes and dreams.”

IS THAT LIKE WHEN ROOMMATES’ MENSTRUAL CYCLES SYNCH UP? “They tell us that there is a common heartbeat to humanity.”

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Comment-geddon

For 6½ years this blog and many others relied on the commenting service Haloscan/Echo/JS-Kit. Thousands of comments were made here from 2005 to earlier this year and were entrusted to it. But Haloscan/Echo/JS-Kit decided to get out of the commenting biz, so on Monday, all those comments will vanish. All that cleverness, outrage and snark, gone.

There seems to be no way to import them into the Blogger system.

This is quite upsetting.

I switched to the Blogger comments system a few months ago, so you can make comments or, about twenty times more frequently, try to get spam past the filtering software. Seriously, does it seem likely that readers of this blog are that interested in Louis Vuitton bags?

Anyway, I wish Haloscan/Echo/JS-Kit luck in its future endeavours.

And by luck, I mean syphilis.

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Today -100: September 25, 1912: Of marines, bull moose heads, and imbeciles

President Taft sends marines to patrol the disputed Haiti-Santo Domingo border, where Dominican rebels have been interfering with the Americans collecting the Dominican customs duties.

Roosevelt is campaigning in Oklahoma in a car decorated with the head of a bull moose. Gross.

Headline of the Day -100: “Ohio’s Many Imbeciles.” The president of the State Board of Administration says that if they don’t start sterilizing them forcibly, the state will go bankrupt within ten years from the cost of supporting the weak-minded. There are over 100 of them in the state institution.

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Today -100: September 24, 1912: Of petticoats

Sign of the Times -100: A letter to the NYT bemoans the vanishing of the petticoat industry, thanks to “freakish French fashion, which insisted that women show their shapes instead of draping their shapely forms.”

Want to know what Woodrow Wilson sounded like? The Library of Congress has five brief recordings dated today -100.

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The State Department deploys its strongest Word of Condemnation

saying the reward offered by the Pakistani Minister for Railroads and Assholery for the murder of the Innocence of the Muslims auteur is “inflammatory and”... wait for it... wait for it... “inappropriate.”

I’m sure Ghulam Ahmad Bilour feels thoroughly chastened.

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Today -100: September 23, 1912: Of pathetic spectacles, nun grabs, angel dicks, and moose bribery

Theodore Roosevelt’s running mate, California Gov. Hiram Johnson, denies that he called President Taft “the most pathetic spectacle in our history.” Rather, he says, he said that politically Taft was the most pathetic spectacle in our political history. So that’s okay then.

NYT Index Typo of the Day -100: “TAFT LETS NUNS KEEP THEIR GRAB.” Nuns teaching in schools on Indian reservations will be allowed to wear their habits (but only the 51 nuns who are already teachers, not any future ones). Note that these are government employees in nun garb.

Paris authorities are refusing to unveil Jacob Epstein’s sculpture of an angel with a large penis on Oscar Wilde’s tomb (I’d include a picture, but I can’t find one from before some moron castrated the poor angel in the 1960s). Rodin supports Epstein, “a talented artist who will make his mark.” With penises!

Several suffragettes heckle British Chancellor David Lloyd George at a meeting in Llanystumdwy and are attacked by the audience. One of them is beaten and her clothes torn off and distributed amongst the crowd as souvenirs, as was the custom. (A longer description appears in the NYT magazine section in October).


Elsewhere, a suffragette threw a worm at Winston Churchill as he was playing golf.

Headline of the Day -100: “Charges Moose Bribery.”

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Today -100: September 22, 1912: Of whiskers, gum, stones, and so-called civil rights

Headline of the Day -100: “ROBBED OF HIS WHISKERS.; Old Bridge, N.J., Resident Reports an Odd Hold-Up.”

The British are developing the American habit of gum-chewing.

Northern Irish Headline of the Day -100: “Ulster Leaders Stoned.” Would explain a lot.

It’s the 50th anniversary of the Emancipation Proclamation (well, of Lincoln’s threat to issue it if the South didn’t surrender), and the NYT Magazine has an article about how “The Negro Has Accomplished Much Since Emancipation.” Let’s see how much I can read before I throw up. Well, it seems that in 1862 negroes were “ignorant, untrained, emotional, an easy mark for promoters and hypocrites, and in no sense equal to the obligations forced upon him for political uses,” but they’ve gotten somewhat better since then by working hard and not expecting anything from white folks. And Southern negroes “have not taken an active part in politics for years; but they have lost nothing of really intrinsic value by their abstention... and do not seem to feel the loss of their so-called civil rights.” So that’s okay then.

Want to know what Teddy Roosevelt sounded like? The Library of Congress has three short recordings dated today -100.

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Today -100: September 21, 1912: Of lost hope, alliances, warplanes, and making imperial ends meet

Election 1912 Headline of the Day -100: “Roosevelt Has Lost Hope.” According to one letter he allegedly wrote to some unnamed person in London (this story is sort of like the Huffington Post -100).

Bulgaria, Serbia, Montenegro, and Greece (which last week initiated conscription) form a military alliance against the Ottoman Empire. The Balkan League.

(Usage note: In English, Serbia was called Servia until early in World War I, when it was decided that Britain’s brave little ally needed a less, um, servile-sounding name.)

The Interparliamentary Union, whatever that is, approves a ban on the use of airplanes in warfare, proposed by Belgium’s former prime minister (and Nobel Peace Prize winner) Auguste Beernaert. So that settles that.

Congress snuck into the Post Office Bill a provision that any newspaper going through the mail has to display the names of its owners, editors, and publishers.

In Britain, Dr. Elizabeth Wilks of the Tax Resistance League has been protesting the lack of women’s suffrage by refusing to pay income taxes. Thanks to a quirk of British law (tax law hasn’t caught up with the notion that married women can own property in their own right, which has been the case for a few decades now), it’s actually her husband who has to report her income (but he has no legal power to compel her to tell him what her income is) and pay the tax. Indeed, when the Inland Revenue seized her furniture, she went to court and won a claim that they could only go after her husband for her income tax. So now Mark Wilks, who in any case can’t afford to pay her tax from his own, smaller income (he’s a schoolmaster) is going to jail.

The former Empress of France Eugénie is shocked at the current price of gowns in Paris. Why, when she was empress, she never paid more than $120. “Even then I was accused of extravagance. If I had had to pay what you ladies pay I should never have been able to make both ends meet.”

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Kerry joins the Appropriateness Police

John Kerry castigates Iraq for letting Iranian planes overfly its territory on the way to Syria: “It just seems completely inappropriate that we’re trying to help build their democracy, support them, put American lives on the line, money into the country, and they’re working against our interest so overtly.”

Oh the utter ingratitude, after all we’ve done to for Iraq.

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Just a reminder

that Adnan Latif died in Guantanamo 12 days ago, and the government won’t tell us the cause of death.

We know he was a hunger-striker and was presumably forcibly fed, although the government claims that he wasn’t hunger striking at the time of his death. Of course, the Pentagon no longer tells us how many hunger strikers there are at Guantanamo.

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Today -100: September 20, 1912: Of recalls and covenants

Theodore Roosevelt says he’d be okay with the recall even being applied to the office of president.

Next month, Ulster Unionists will all sign a “Covenant” to fight “the present conspiracy to set up home rule in Ireland”.

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