Sunday, April 20, 2003

I would suggest he not pop his head up

There’s nothing like the current Bush administration to make you regret the times you rolled your eyes while listening to a conspiracy theorist or told some reductionist Marxist that the world was really more complicated than that. Evidently, it’s not. Now, corporations are buying legislation directly; the US is turning its attention from Iraq to the next country on Israel’s enemy list and is planning a pipeline to deliver Iraqi oil to Israel; the only Iraqi government office in Baghdad that wasn’t bombed was the oil ministry, which was also the only place protected by troops from looters on day one of the occupation; and the media, well....

I hate to think the world is really this unsubtle, but Time magazine recently pulled from its website an article it published in March 1998 by George Bush the Elder and Brent Scowcroft, giving reasons they didn’t remove Saddam Hussein in the 1st Gulf War. It even airbrushed it from the Table of Contents for that issue (incidentally, that issue is “premium content,” meaning that you have to have paid them in order to access it, so the removal of the article is also a rip-off to whoever pays them for premium content). Anyway, if you want to read it (I didn’t), it’s archived here.

So possibly the conspiracists had it right all along. Maybe we should all take another look at the Trilateral Commission.

Here’s a nicely appalling anti-abortion parody.

Rumsfeld says that the US probably can’t find Iraq’s weapons without someone leading us to them. So what’s the point of having a CIA, NSA, DIA, etc? Let’s abolish them and just post a $1 billion reward every time we want information like this. Even the British Tories are saying that if Blair doesn’t produce evidence about WMDs there should be an investigation as to whether the intelligence services misled the government. No one is making such a demand in this country.

Trouble in paradise, or at least Baghdad: the #2 man in Chalabi’s Iraqi National Congress (which is neither Iraqi nor national nor a congress) has declared in favor of an Islamic theocracy (and named himself mayor of Baghdad and lord of all the rubble he surveys). Chalabi denies any such intentions. When the CIA was giving all that money to the INC, did it know about this? According to “Mayor” Zubaidi, he was chosen as mayor not by reverse alphabetical order as you might imagine, but by “tribal leaders and educated people, the doctors of the city and other prominent leaders.”

The US is meanwhile restoring Baathists to power, if they ever left. In fact, that general who was just captured, who had been in charge of the chemical weapons program, well, the US military just offered his brother his job back. He works at the oil ministry.

Remember the restaurant the US allegedly bombed in an attempt to assassinate Saddam? It’s reopened. This is possible because all 4 bombs missed, hitting civilian houses. The restaurant turns out to be pretty down-market too, not really Saddam’s style--$1.50 chicken, not gold toilets--so he was probably never there to begin with. Bush’s advice to Saddam today: “I would suggest he not pop his head up.” Why? It’s hard to see him being in much danger from us.

Bush spent Easter with two of the POWs, like they haven’t suffered enough. Have you noticed that our designated heroes from this war are all POWs? I think it’s a post-9/11 thing that even during a war of conquest, the US celebrates its “victims.”

Bush says that Syria has gotten the message. “I'm confident the Syrian government has heard us.” Yup, those were pretty loud explosions.

Slovakia, which is not Slovenia no matter what the Bushies think, has signed a deal with the Vatican on “freedom of conscience,” which of course means no such thing. Under it, no doctor will have to give an abortion, teacher teach sex ed, judges can throw out divorce applications on religious grounds, etc etc. Like Poland, when it joins the EU it will demand an opt-out on “cultural” issues, like giving equal rights to gays.

Have I ever mentioned the tv-parody website If not, now I have. In the current one, I esp like the idea of a youth-oriented news programme [the site is British] called “Now ’n Shit.”

I’m going over the links archive at dead website, since it is bound to be pulled at some point. Expect some odd links over the next little while, such as:

A concentration camp made of Legos.

Or torture devices and scenes of industrial accidents, also made of Legos.

How to cure depression. You won’t believe me if I tell you the title, so just click (make sure you scroll down to the other suggested books).

How to live forever.

No comments:

Post a Comment