Friday, February 08, 2008

Wherein is revealed the best vice president in history

Today it was Bush’s turn to address the Conservative Political Action Conference.

He called Cheney “the best Vice President in history. Mother may have a different opinion.” This is not only George acting out his daddy issues in public, but doing so in a forum of people who have nothing but contempt for his father.

Also: Vice Presidents John Adams, Thomas Jefferson, Teddy Roosevelt...?

NAMES, WHY DOES HE NEVER GIVE US NAMES? “We believe our nation has the right to defend itself -- even if sometimes others disagree.”

WE DON’T NEED NO STINKING PERMISSION SLIPS: “They tend to be suspicious of America’s exercise of global leadership -- unless, of course, we get a permission slip from international organizations.”

AND THEY WERE PROBABLY JUST WAITING TO BE ASKED, TOO: “And we darn sure didn’t seek the approval of groups like Code Pink and before deciding what to do.”

“When I took office, our society was grappling with a troubling rate of drug use among our children. ... We believe people should be held responsible for their actions and we know that people can change their behavior. ... We helped move drug addicts from a culture of victimization to a culture of responsibility.” This from the serial drunk driver who somehow never got sent to jail, the guy who stopped showing up for his Air National Guard service the minute they introduced drug-testing.

WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CLUE? “Six-and-a-half years ago, our country faced the worst attack in our history. I understood immediately that we would have to act boldly to protect the American people.”

NOTE TO WHITE HOUSE TRANSCRIBER: A [SIC] AFTER THE WORD PROGRESS WOULD ALSO BE GOOD. “Yet even the enemy recognizes the progress we’re being [sic] making.”

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