Monday, November 14, 2011

Obama at APEC: The United States is, and always will be, a Pacific nation

Obama held a press conference following the APEC summit in Hawaii.

OF COURSE THE STAMPS WILL BE MADE IN CHINA: “Ninety-five percent of the world’s consumers are beyond our borders. I want them to be buying goods with three words stamped on them: Made in America.”

DUDE OWNS A GLOBE: “As I’ve said, the United States is, and always will be, a Pacific nation.”

He said of sanctions on Iran, “And they’re having an impact. All our intelligence indicates that Iran’s economy is suffering as a consequence of this.” He’s applauding making the Iranian people suffer. Swell.

“TECHNICALLY”: “the recent IAEA report indicates what we already knew, which is, although Iran does not possess a nuclear weapon and is technically still allowing IAEA observers into their country...”

IT’S NOT A RACE – ISRAEL WON THE RACE 50 YEARS AGO: “all three of us [Hu & Medvedev] entirely agree on the objective, which is making sure that Iran does not weaponize nuclear power and that we don’t trigger a nuclear arms race in the region.”

IN WHICH ONE WORD EQUALS THE SAME WORD: On Chinese currency over-valuation: “But the United States and other countries, I think understandably, feel that enough is enough.”

MAKES YOU WONDER WHY WE HAVE MORE THAN ONE POLITICAL PARTY (NOW SOMEONE’S GOING TO WRITE IN COMMENTS THAT WE DON’T – AREN’T YOU, ELI?): “I’ve been very frank with Chinese leaders, though, in saying that the American people across the board -- left, right and center -- believe in trade, believe in competition.”

He calls on China to become “a responsible leader in the world economy.” Evidently being a responsible leader like Obama means getting to talk to everyone else like they’re unruly teenagers: “But that requires them to take responsibility, to understand that their role is different now than it might have been 20 years ago or 30 years ago, where if they were breaking some rules, it didn’t really matter, it did not have a significant impact. ... Now they’ve grown up, and so they’re going to have to help manage this process in a responsible way.”

ACT LIKE DICKS AND SCREW OVER THE POOR?: On the “super-committee” and the deficit: “I still hold out the prospect that there’s going to be a light-bulb moment where everybody says ‘Ah-ha! Here’s what we’ve got to do.’” If it’s a compact flourescent light-bulb, Michelle Bachmann is going to throw a fit, you know.

ACT LIKE DICKS AND SCREW OVER THE POOR?: “Do I anticipate that at some point they [Republicans] recognize that doing nothing is not an option? That’s my hope.”

On the Sarkozy-Obama open mic moment re Bibi “The Liar” Netanyahu: “I’m not going to comment on conversations that I have with individual leaders”.

Obama ditched the hallowed tradition of making APEC leaders dress up in funny “native” costumes, because he has no sense of whimsy.

Here was Ponchopallooza ‘04 in Chile:

Bar Girls in Hanoi, 2006:

(Click here for my favorite of my APEC pics posts.)

Whatever the fuck this was supposed to be in Australia 2007:

Ponchopalooza ‘08 in Mexico:

Chinese Restaurant Waiters in Singapore 2009:

Next year, Vladivostok. I wanna see some damn Cossack costumes.

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