Guns for cons

It’s now legal to bring guns into bars in Arizona. Project for some day when I’m bored: join NRA, attend meeting of same, propose ending the unfair infringement of the 2nd Amendment rights of prisoners, see how much support I get.

Veiled

From a NYT story that asks the burning question, “Is Iran Designing Warheads?” (I’m picturing arches and majestic domes): “The Israelis, who have delivered veiled threats of a military strike...” Yes, veiled, just the word I was looking for. Because there is nothing more subtle than the Israeli threats to bomb the shit out of Iran.

Propaganda kills

an Afghan girl. The Times: “This is believed to be the first time that a civilian has been killed by a box of public information leaflets.”

A courtesy

The Honduran coup regime’s foreign minister threatens to de-embassize (that’s a word, right?) Brazil’s embassy if it doesn’t hand President Zelaya over or remove him from Honduras within ten days, but “As a courtesy, we are not planning to invade the place.” Because no one – no one! – can accuse Honduras’s coupsters of lacking courtesy.

Don’t you hate it when an anecdote just trails off?

Obama, yesterday: “I was up at the G20 -- just a little aside -- I was up at the G20, and some of you saw those big flags and all the world leaders come in and Michelle and I are shaking hands with them. One of the leaders -- I won’t mention who it was -- he comes up to me. We take the picture, we go behind. He says, ‘Barack, explain to me this health care debate.’ He says, ‘We don’t understand it. You’re trying to make sure everybody has health care and they’re putting a Hitler mustache on you -- I don’t -- that doesn’t make sense to me. Explain that to me.’ He didn’t understand.”

Er, so how did you explain it to him?

I got nuthin’

Baltimore public schools institute Meatless Mondays, replacing the traditional Mystery Meat Mondays.

So, does Dexter, serial-killer trying to blend in with a society whose mores he does not feel, = Don Draper? Discuss.

For extra credit, where does Roman Polanski fit in to this thesis?

Ahmadinejad and the nuclear enrichment plant of doom

Obama on the evidence of Iran’s secret nuclear facility: “This was the work product of three intelligence agencies, not just one.” Well, if it’s three whole intelligence agencies, then it must be true. (I think he means the CIA, MI6 and French intelligence). “They checked over this work in a painstaking fashion.” Seems to me I’ve heard this sort of thing before.


The most unlikely part of this story? That the US supposedly for years possessed intel that would have advanced Dick Cheney’s agenda, but failed to leak it.

Senators Bayh, Kyl and Lieberman issued a statement accusing Iran of a “consistent pattern of deceit, concealment and bad faith,” because if there are three things Joe Lieberman hates, they’re deceit, concealment and bad faith. “Until Iran proves otherwise, we must assume the worst about its nuclear intentions and activities -- and act accordingly.” Can’t let the smoking gun come in the form of a mushroom cloud.

Obama’s UN speech & the Middle East

Israeli Foreign Minister Lieberman praises Obama for saying in his UN speech that Israel is a Jewish state. As always with American foreign policy, Obama treats the Palestinians who live inside Israel proper as the forgotten people, the equivalent of an embarrassing fart, best ignored.

Obama also again called on the Palestinian gov to “end incitement against Israel” without naming the newspapers he wanted suppressed and individuals he wanted cracked down on. If you’re calling for a country to repress free speech, you should at least be specific about which speech you want repressed.

Sarah Palin and the land bridge to Asia

Oh, which speech to blog about today, Obama at the UN or Sarah Palin in Hong Kong? What to do, what to do.

From Sarah Palin’s speech in Hong Kong (no link, since the Wall Street Journal took down the excerpts from the closed-door event they’d posted earlier):

OF COURSE SHE’D HAVE TO FIND... SOMETHING ELSE... TO HUNT FROM PLANES: “We got a chance yesterday to see some of the magnificent city of Hong Kong, and while the wildlife to human ratio here, it differs from that of Alaska, uh, I do think I could get used to this.”

AND VICE VERSA: “And we have a special place in our hearts in Alaska for the Pacific Rim.”

WHAT AN AWFUL THING TO SAY ABOUT YOUR DAUGHTER: “We have the world’s most abundant salmon spawning grounds right there in Bristol Bay.”

WHAT SARAH HAS ALWAYS BEEN REALLY INTERESTED IN: “Personally, I’ve always been really interested in the ideas, too, about the land bridge.”

YES, ALASKA AND HONG KONG ARE JUST EXACTLY THE SAME: “We have much in common with Hong Kong. We’re both young and transient, independent and libertarian.”

WHAT YOU CAN CALL HER: “You can call me a common sense conservative.”

HAVE YOU CHECKED BEHIND THE SOFA CUSHIONS? “what happened to that Reagan legacy, the Reaganism that worked what happened to that?”

IT WAS THE JEWS, WASN’T IT? “While we might be in the wilderness, conservatives need to defend the free market system and explain what really caused last year’s collapse.”

HOW TO GET OUT OF HERE: “Ronald Reagan, he was faced with an even worse recession and he showed us how to get out of here. If you want real job growth, you cut taxes!”

BECAUSE ALL YOUR WORDS EXCEPT FOR THOSE TWO WERE SO RATIONAL: “I seem to have acquired notoriety in national debate. And all because of two words: death panels.”

WHOLE? “we should seek, as we did in Europe, an Asia whole and free.”

Some common ground

Honduran President Zelaya has returned to Honduras – well, the Brazilian embassy in Honduras. Very possibly still wearing his pajamas, we just can’t tell.


Hillary Clinton helpfully advises that it is “imperative that the return of President Zelaya does not lead to any conflict or violence”. She did not proffer any suggestions as to how the elected president might restore himself to power without “conflict” but did suggest “instead that everyone act in a peaceful way to try to find some common ground.” Some common ground between, you know, Zelaya being president and Zelaya not being president.

What, not even the giant puppets?

Ahead of the G-20 summit in Pittsburgh, Obama gave an interview to the editors of the Toledo Blade and the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette. His message to protesters: give up. Capitalism will always defeat mere democracy:

I was always a big believer in - when I was doing organizing before I went to law school - that focusing on concrete, local, immediate issues that have an impact on people’s lives is what really makes a difference and that having protests about abstractions [such] as global capitalism or something, generally, is not really going to make much of a difference.

So go bother your city council, and stop pestering Obama with your silly “abstractions.” Don’t bother your little heads about national and international policy. No we can’t! No we can’t! No we can’t!

He did add, “I think that’s part of what makes America wonderful is people have a lot of different opinions”. A lot of impotent, impotent opinions. So stay home and just shout your different opinions at the teevee. That’s what makes America wonderful.

Czars

The wingers have gotten very upset about the number of unaccountable “czars” Obama has advising him. After all, George Bush always submitted the voices in his head for Senate confirmation.

Obama doesn’t want witch hunts taking place

I am not paid enough to read all 5 transcripts of Obama’s tv appearances today, much less watch them (Lindsey Graham made a little joke about him appearing everywhere except the Food Network – because if there’s anything Lindsey Graham hates, it’s a media whore). So let’s look at just one, Face the Nation.

On insurance companies: “We don’t mind them making profits, we just want them to be accountable to their customers.” Whatever that means.

Asked if insurance companies won’t just pass the proposed taxes on them on to their customers (but in an accountable way): “Here’s the problem, they’re passing on those costs to the consumer anyway.” They’re passing on costs that don’t exist yet?

SO STOP SENDING HIM THOSE EMAILS ABOUT INCREASED SIZE, HE JUST ISN’T INTERESTED: “I have no interest in increasing the size of government.”

On the Justice Dept investigation of the CIA’s interrogation practices (or, as he put it, “problems that occurred under the previous administration”): “I don’t want witch hunts taking place.” Although dunking them in ponds to see if they’re witches would be nicely ironic.

Really, with no doubt at all that the CIA tortured prisoners, the phrase you choose to describe investigating and prosecuting those practices is “witch hunt.”

Talking about the cancelled missile defense program, Mister Diplomacy referred twice to “the Iranian threat” and twice said that Russia was “paranoid” about the program.

Taking fashion tips from Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids

I rather like how the last sentence in this London Times story: “Mullah Omar, the Taliban leader, yesterday reminded western forces they had lost in Afghanistan before. ‘We fought against the British invaders for 80 years from 1839 to 1919 and ultimately got independence by defeating Britain,’ he said in a statement on a Taliban website. Omar is believed to be in hiding in Pakistan.” Neatly puts the one-eyed wonder in proper perspective.

The thing about getting a dead-trees newspaper is that your eye falls on things you would never ever click on. For example, without the NYT styles section this week, I would not be up on the latest fashions.

David Petraeus would totally do Afghanistan

David Petraeus has an op-ed piece in the London Times entitled “Afghanistan is Hard All the Time, But It’s Doable.” Cue porn music.

He introduced himself to his London audience (the article was adapted from a speech) thus: “The region under my command consists of 20 countries, from Egypt in the west to Pakistan in the east, and from Kazakhstan in the north to Yemen and the waters off Somalia to the south.” He thinks 20 countries are “under my command.” No imperial hubris here.

(Except for suggesting that John Donne’s Meditation XVII was about counter-insurgency, which is something I’m pretty sure I didn’t realize in the 9th grade, Petraeus says exactly what you think he would say about Afghanistan, so you needn’t bother clicking through.)

Precedents in assholery

Monday, the Obama admin filed a brief in District Court arguing that prisoners at Bagram Airfield have no habeas corpus rights because it is located an active war zone, glossing over the fact that some of the prisoners were only in an active war zone because they were kidnapped from other countries and brought there. Reminds me of the 2,264 ethnic Japanese the US seized from Peru and other Latin American countries during World War II and transported to the internment camps in the US. When the US began paying reparations to interned Japanese-Americans in 1990 it excluded these internees because they had been... wait for it... illegal immigrants.

Condoms to the rescue. Again.

Slate asks the question, “Can Condoms Combat Climate Change?”

CONTEST: Complete this response: “Yes, but only if...”

Under the order of Islam’s enemies

Why we fight, redux: The upper house of the Afghan parliament votes to condemn Karzai’s amnesty of Pervez Kambaksh, the student convicted of blasphemy for downloading material about women’s rights from the internet, complaining that he did so “under the order of Islam’s enemies,” by which they mean Western nations (there is no evidence one way or another that Obama actually did press for this). Oh, let’s do keep troops in Afghanistan forever, just to keep these people who think we’re Islam’s enemies in power.

The Republicans in the California state senate, having failed to kill a program that provides help to poor people in filling out their tax returns, a program which the makers of the software program TurboTax have contributed millions to campaign funds in an attempt to eliminate, retaliated by blocking 20 bills, including funding to keep domestic abuse shelters open. The funds had passed the lower house unanimously, but needed 2/3 in the senate. Other bills that fell victim to the hissy fit would have prevented the firings of cops and firefighters and distributed money to prepare for swine flu – not even California money but federal dollars, which the state will now lose. The legislative session has now expired.

Stupid Hollywood Movie Idea of the Day: Battleship: The Motion Picture. As in “You sunk my battleship.”

All the news that’s fit not to print

In a 2,579-word front-page article asking the question how many Israeli settlers would resist being removed from the West Bank, the NYT fails to mention the many subsidies that settlers receive from the state.

And on the NYT’s op-ed pages, Reagan’s assistant secretary of state for Africa Chester Crocker talks about how Obama needs to get “engagement diplomacy” exactly right, without quite mentioning that his and Reagan’s policy of “constructive engagement” was in support of the apartheid regime in South Africa.

Maybe it’ll make more sense in Farsi

The tv show “Lost” has gotten approval from the Iranian authorities to be sold in DVD form and possibly broadcast, dubbed into Farsi. Naturally, there will be some censorship because, as the Ministry of Culture and Islamic Guidance put it, “that Kate is just too damned hot.” (The former head of the ministry had denounced the show for its “Zionist concepts,” by the way.) There is also talk of doing an Iranian version.

CONTEST: So, what sort of changes would have to be made to Lost to make it more acceptable to the mullahs? Also – what Zionist concepts could they be talking about? Locke as Moses?