Friday, February 17, 2006

And we tell the truth

Secretary of War Rumsfeld says that the US is less competent in “manipulating opinion elites” than are the terrorists.
A few years ago in Iraq, under Saddam Hussein, an Iraqi could have his tongue cut out if he was found in possession of a satellite dish or used the Internet without government approval. Today, satellite dishes are ubiquitous in that country as well. Regrettably, many of the news channels being watched through these dishes are extremely hostile to the West.
So Rummy is advocating going back to the tongue-cutting-out-thing, I take it.

(Also, I don’t know of anyone having their tongue cut out for using the Internet in Iraq, and I don’t think Iraq banned satellite dishes; that’s Iran you’re thinking of. But other than that...)

Rummy laughs at the thought of people’s tongues being cut out

He says the US is slower to respond because “unlike our enemies, which propagate lies with impunity -- with no penalty whatsoever... Our government has to be the source. And we tell the truth.”

Rummy laughs at the thought of telling the truth

He complains that “allegations of ‘buying news’ in Iraq... leads to a ‘chilling effect’ for those who are asked to serve in the military public affairs field. The conclusion is drawn that there is no tolerance for innovation”. Hate to tell ya, but bribery isn’t an innovation, it’s actually a pretty old concept.

He cites as an example of improving practice the deployment of a military communications team after the Pakistan earthquake, “to help focus the attention of the media on the U.S. government’s truly extraordinary commitment to help the Pakistani people.” Well, its truly extraordinary commitment to be filmed helping the Pakistani people. He says this “changed dramatically” the attitudes towards the US in Pakistan. Evidently his speech was written before the riots this week in which a KFC and other symbols of America were burned. “Indeed, it was not long before the new favorite toy in Pakistan was a small replica of a Chinook helicopter, because of the many lives our helicopters saved, and the mountains of relief supplies they delivered.” Are you suspecting what I’m suspecting, that the mountains of
relief supplies included small replicas of Chinook helicopters?

Rumsfeld pretends to be a bird (or possibly a Chinook helicopter)...

But quickly realizes his mistake when he sees Dick Cheney with a rifle.

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