Sunday, September 17, 2006

I think you’re wrong. I think you’re right.

The interrogation “techniques” the CIA wants legalized evidently are: induced hypothermia; forcing suspects to stand for prolonged periods; sleep deprivation; the “attention grab” (grabbing the detainee’s shirt); the “attention slap”; the “belly slap”; sound and light manipulation. I’m actually surprised for some reason that direct physical assaults are listed.

Fred Barnes provides a few more details of Bush’s get-together with conservative pundits last week. He said, “I’ve never been more convinced that the decisions I made are the right decisions.” Isn’t it cute how he still thinks that his refusal to admit mistakes will convince other people that he hasn’t made any?

He said, “It’s impossible for someone to have grown up in the 50s and 60s to envision a conflict with people that just kill mercilessly, using techniques that are kind of foreign to modern warfare. But it’s real. I’m telling you, it’s real.” Yes, we all got lulled into a false belief in the gentleness of humankind by the Nazis and so forth during the mid-20th century’s golden age of peace and love.

He said that when people wanted him to ask for the American people to make sacrifices in The War Against Terror (TWAT), what those cynical bastards really meant was tax increases. “That’s what that means as far as I’m concerned.”

Bush insisted that he does not live in a bubble. “I listen to a lot of people. I’ve got smart people around me.” Name one. “And they can march right in here – this Oval Office can be slightly intimidating, but I’ve got people here who can fight through the aura and say, ‘I think you’re wrong. I think you’re right.’” That’s just how they say it too: they say the first sentence, then see Cheney pointing the shotgun at their face...

They probably are required to march when they enter the Oval Office, too.

And Maureen Dowd, who I assume was not invited, reports that Bush blamed American impatience on there being too many tv channels.

Until there’s an all-Simpsons channel, there are not too many channels.

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