Wednesday, April 30, 2008

I firmly believe that if you have low expectations, you’ll achieve them

The US has moved a second aircraft carrier, the USS Abraham Lincoln, into the Persian Gulf. Secretary of War Robert Gates says the move “could be seen... as a reminder.” Oh good.

Today Bush met at the White House with the national teacher of the year, Mike Geisen of Prineville, Oregon, and the state teachers of the year. Mr. Geisen provides us that great rarity, a picture in which George Bush is not the goofiest-looking individual.

CERTAINLY NOT HIS ENGLISH TEACHER: “You know, I like to tell people that -- you know, one of the interesting questions you get in my line of work is ‘Can you name a teacher who had influenced you?’ I said, ‘Yes, my wife.’” Dude, at an event for teachers, you’re really not supposed to imply that none of your teachers ever influenced you. Although I’m sure all his teachers went into hiding long ago out of sheer shame.

SPECIAL: “And really the best teachers have a special intuition -- and I suspect a little potential -- the ability to see potential and the ability to have the patience necessary to watch it grow.”

STILL CALLS: “It basically -- if you really think about the [No Child Left Behind] Act, it, one, refuses to, what I used to call -- still call -- refuses to accept the soft bigotry of low expectations. I firmly believe....” STRAIGHT LINE ALERT! STRAIGHT LINE ALERT! “...that if you have low expectations, you’ll achieve them.”

WHAT A TEACHER OUGHT TO WELCOME: “I also believe that if you’re a teacher that you ought to welcome a law that says we trust you in your ability to set high expectations.”

HE JUST COULDN’T REFRAIN FROM BRINGING RELIGION INTO THE CLASSROOM, COULD HE? “And I ask God’s blessings on your work and the work of teachers all across America.”

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