Monday, May 22, 2006

I hear the Counterinsurgency Center for Excellence is totally a party school

Why does anyone buy arms from the US? The US is refusing to sell Venezuela the replacement parts to keep its F-16s flyable, and claims that Venezuela must get US permission to sell them to China or Iran, as it is threatening to do. So the US took their money, tries to dictate what they can and can’t do with the product they bought, and won’t support that product. Who do they think they are, Microsoft?

My question is, if Venezuela can’t get spare parts, how could Iran?

The military thinks the way to solve its problems in Iraq is to keep popping out new organizations. I know, said Gen. George Casey, let’s create a Counterinsurgency Center for Excellence and... OK, half of you think I made that up; we’re simply not going to be able to go on with this paragraph until you’ve confirmed that it exists by clicking here. Did you know that the “best tactic in counterinsurgency warfare” is to “get out of the vehicles and walk”? That’s just one of the things they teach at the Wayne and Garth Excellent Counterinsurgency Center for Excellence, where students are also taught to... wait for it... “think outside the box.” For example, “there are certain things you can do that are not helpful, like the escalation of force. Let’s really think about, ‘Do we have to shoot our weapons to warn people?’” Cuz, see, and just hear me out here, “If we do escalation of force and it results in some needless casualties, then you haven’t created a lot of support for what we’re trying to do.” So evidently you can major in The Totally Fucking Obvious, with a minor in Duh Studies.

Another new organization: the National Unity Office, a group within the Coalition forces which will “interface with the [Iraqi] government to help them achieve their goals.” Another idea of Gen. Casey, who believes that there are three pillars for Iraq’s unity government (UG) to be successful: unity, security and prosperity (or, as I’d rearrange it for acronymous reasons, prosperity, unity and security).

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