Thursday, May 18, 2006

I would emphasize getting it right more often

Michael Hayden has a cunning plan for the CIA: “I would emphasize getting it right more often.” That’s so crazy it just might work. Makes you wonder why no one has ever thought of it before.

He will also preserve the CIA’s “proud culture of risk-taking and excellence.” And especially, excellent risk taking.

Bush went to Arizona today, to look at the border. He declared it to be a big border. “You might remember I was the governor of a border state, so I understand how big the border is.” And you thought he didn’t learn anything when he was governor of Texas.

Yes, Mr. President. It certainly is a big border.

It’s not just big, it’s got lots of shiny toys, like motion censors and infrared cameras and unmanned aerial drones (unmanned because that’s work Americans just won’t do). “We’re in the process of making our border the most technologically advanced border in the world.” I’m sure it will make us the envy of xenophobes everywhere.

He said that “We have a duty in Washington, D.C. to conduct this debate with dignity and honor.” Of course he wasn’t in DC when he said that, he was in Yuma, so instead of the whole dignity thing, he went riding in a dune buggy. Wheeee! The driver, by the way, is a Border Patrol agent who rejoices in the name Rocky Kittle. Only in America. Which is the point, I guess.

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